Oh wow.

So I think i have to agree with singnelise  (thanks for blogging!!). I have almost forgotten about this blog  But I have quite the update....
I no longer have the "butteryfly" feelings for S. I have come to realise (which took a long time), that things have changed and it was time to move on.
Althought I have moved on from S.
There now is Matt.
I meet him half way through last year, we sorta hung out at the begining of the summer, but then he went away to camp for the rest of the summer.
Now he is back and going to uni. and we have been hanging out a lot more. Now our relationship to begin with was very flirty (jokingly) and now i think i kinda like him.
But when do you know if you can date one of your best guy friends? He knows like everything about me. But should I bother with dropping hints and possibly informing him that i like him? or do I just let it be? And how can you tell if the flirting is more then just horsing around??
oh my.
This seems like something you'd see in a movie or read in a book?

Well I haven't posted in quite a while, but that doesn't mean i'm not reading a bunch of blogs.
And I recently just read a blog posted by bittersweet_syphony and at the end she wrote

"You'll never find the right person if you never let go of the wrong one, right?"

I was an eye opener to me, maybe S and i not working out was a sign that he was obviously not the right guy. Time to move on...I think so.
Now, This all seems so simple written out, could it be?
School starts up again in a little more than a month. What happens if we regain communication and i start to fall for him again? help?

So the short version of my sop story,
I liked this guy lets name him S, So S and i had a thing going on and then school band trip came and we spent a lot of time together.
We held hands, cuddled, etc. and we both knew full well that we liked each other and then all of a sudden i was told by someone that there was no chance of us going out. So i confronted S and he said he was going to be really busy this summer and didn't want to blow me off all the time. So this was all kinda like a slap in the face for me.

So back at school things were kinda akward between us and then it got better i showed up to his rugby games. and we chatted and then things got a little flirty between us again. my hopes got up again. and then ..... summer vacation...haven't seen nor spoken to him since school ended.

So to the point of the subject of this entry.
I feel completely lost without seeing him everyday. he's on my mind..a lot more than i think he should be right now. and i have no way of communicating with him...no phone # , email, facebook, NOTHING. (he has dial-up.)

So i've tried the whole get over him and move on. Attempted that...the guy i was flirty with...he's gone for the summer...7 weeks. And then i meet up with one of his friends at a bonfire...and she said that all S ever did was talk about me and that he really liked me.

And now i'm just fed up with my feelings....normal?