I was asked the other day by a girl some stuff about guys. One of her questions was "why does he flirt with me, but not ask for a number?"
This answer is very simple, because I do this all the time.
I flirt because it's fun. Flirting is a great way to be nice and upping my chances of going on a date with her.
I just don't grab her number because
women expect you to call them once you have their number. I may be busy literally and seriously for the next 2 weeks, and really, I don't want to have to deal with feeling bad because I didn't call you in 2 weeks. So I just flirt mostly, keep it simple, and that way, no one is disappointed.
There is a second reason, which all guys are very much aware of.
We fail to get your number sometimes because we know that there are other guys out there as well who want (or have) your number. Or even worse, we think you're taken (which most girls seem to be after the third week in October and through the week after Valentine's Day). I often wonder why.
I admit I'm also guilty of this as well, but if it looks too good to be true, it usually is, in my case. I will also admit that sometimes, I forget. I know that most girls would think "why would you forget something like that?" but we do - we're guys, not girls who remember everything.
Laziness is also a possible reason, as is a disease that most of us guys seem to have called "obliviousness".
There is also denial - "I don't think she likes me like that" or "She's probably got a boyfriend anyway".
I am guilty for all of these, because I'd rather assume that a girl isn't interested in me than go after a girl that REALLY isn't interested in me, and I look like a hopeless stalker or something (women often like to assume that guys are).
So, in conclusion, the reasons why guys flirt but don't get the number:
DenialObliviousnessForgetfulnessPossible guilt due to time restraintsAssuming you have someone else you like (or are with)Thanks for commenting/recommending.
True
Comments (33)
Fear
I don't ask for a number because I don't have a phone.
I don't ask because I'm bisex.
You also don't NEED to ask for a phone number if you see the girl every day or something like that. People can flirt and not be intrested on going anywhere further than that as well.
I know some girls that if a guy asks for their number, they give a rejection hot line. No wonder why guys hardly ask for numbers, girls do dumb immature nonsense.
@TheSpaceBass@xanga - hahaha truth.
Reading your entry reminded me of one of my biggest pet peeves: the misuse of the word "literally."
Wow this sounds exactly like how I think and I am a girl. Â
@mycontinuity@xanga - Yeah, mine too! I read the post and where the word was used, I don't even know what he was trying to say. I can't imagine what definition the word was thought to have had... I hate when people misuse words!! Makes me want to send them a post-it note :)
I flirt because you think I'm flirting when I'm just having a normal conversation in which certain things I say is driven by emotion so I can't help but sound that way >.>
My reason: Just because you flirt with me doesn't mean your interested (and I don't want to look like a fool). I won't kid you, I flirt with girls all the time that I am completely uninterested in. I often assume that the girl is doing this.
@MochaSprinkle@xanga - LOL. I wish more people would (nicely) correct me when I make mistakes online so I can be aware of it.
@atmaster@xanga - girls do stupid things, but then guys also do dumb things too, like flirting and showing interest, and then doing NOTHING about it :)
misleading and frustrating, and to me, a tad disrespectful.
flirting is fun! i try to flirt with girls who have boyfriends (but not in front of their boyfriends) because we know that we'd never go out with each other and enjoy the fun-ness that is flirting!!!
my current reason for not asking for numbers: i have a girlfriend already
in the great words of fat joe... "i'm not a player. i just crush a lot" hahaha
well said son
i like the way that you think :)
@mycontinuity@xanga - I literally died after reading your comment =D
@MochaSprinkle@xanga - me, too! if one were not literally busy, is one busy figuratively? o_0
how about this reason: asking for numbers is outdated!
the last time a new guy flirted with me he just told me that he would find me on facebook later.
I don't think flirting is nice and I think it is overrated.
@in_a_landscape@xanga - Definitely. I flirt with people I'm interested in all the time, too. Flirting is fun and harmless.
in all honesty, I'm a habitual Flirt-er. no lie.
sometimes i don't even know I'm doing it. i think that a LOT of people are like that. which is why asking for numbers is hard, because sometimes it's hard to gauge ACTUAL interest from habitual flirting---ya know?I only flirt with intentions of being with the person. You wouldnt catch me flirting any other times.
But yes all these reasons are true
@EarthsAzureLight@xanga - I was wondering why that wasn't there!
But, this is a really insightful post =]
These days I assume the if the guy is "flirting" or being nice, it's just because he's friendly. I've met too many guys for whom I developed even the smallest feelings just because they were giving me special attention. So now I just don't care. If he's being nice and I take a liking to him, I'll be nice as well. If I'm not interested, I won't flirt back. If he's not going to make an effort to contact me afterwards, whether it be because he's not interested or too shy, then I'm not going to think about it too much.