Friday, 01 February 2013
In a recent conversation I had with a friend, she revealed to me that my ex felt the need to tell a mutual colleague of ours that the reason we were no longer together was because he was "in a point in his life where he was looking for a wife." When she told me this, I felt my heart break into a million more pieces. I was so angry... angry that he did not think I was "wife material," angry that he washed his dirty laundry out in public, angry that he never once told me he felt this way, but mostly angry at myself for believing that we had a future together.
In that moment, I wanted to call him out and give him my two cents. It's a good thing I didn't, because I probably would regret it.
I've had a week to soak it in and he's wrong; I was a damn good girlfriend and I would have been a damn good wife.
And then I realized, I'm glad we're not together because the truth is, I don't want to have to fill this role that he has imagined for his wife. The day I marry someone, the day someone becomes my husband, it's not because he has met the qualification of "husband material," it will be because he is the person I want to share the rest of my life with. It will be because he brings happiness to me, it will be because he understands and supports me in everything I do, and it will be because he is my best friend and I couldn't imagine a life without him.
Have you ever been told directly or indirectly that you weren't wife or husband material? Have you left someone for those reasons?