This post was submitted anonymously.
My boyfriend broke up with me this weekend. We'd been together for 5 1/2 months and it was really great, but when we fought, it was really bad. We argued more often than most couples should - about three times a month on average. But we learned from each fight and things got better. We moved very quickly and the stress really started developing when we tried to discuss moving in together into a new apartment when my lease ends in December.
As volatile as it was, I love him deeply and am sad it has ended. Yesterday we exchanged all of our personal belongings, he gave me back my house keys, I gave him back the promise ring he gave me.
I don't know what to do. In the grand scheme of things 5 months isn't a long time, but I really did love him and think we could have continued to work our issues out together. Yes there are things we don't like about each other but when you love someone, shouldn't that help with compromising for each other?
The main issues that he had with me include:
1. My finances - I didn't save as much as I should have but he taught me how to.
2. My workout ethic - I do a lot of yoga and am very happy with my physique and he is as well, but the issue is that I'm not so much into running but he wants to run with me and I don't really enjoy running.
The main issues that I had with him are:
1. The way he gets angry easily - It's part of his personality.
2. The impatience he has when I am upset about something and want him to comfort me - He wants to offer solutions, not just hear me vent and sometimes that's all I need.
3. He just started a new job and is very stressed - He gets stressed out a LOT.
4. He doesn't enjoy hanging out with my mother (she's totally overbearing so I get it) but uses her as an excuse for his stress even though we only see her at dinner with my whole family once a month. After dinner, he always tells me that he actually had a really good time, so I don't buy it.
Towards the end, the fights became more frequent and less constructive.
But I still love him and he said that in a month or two we can reconnect to see how the other is doing. I want him back even though things were tough, I do love him. But I also don't know if I am saying this because we JUST broke up or if I believe we are really meant to be together.
I'm scared to be lonely and have been crying my eyes out for the last 24 hours. I just don't know what to do. In a moment of anger last night I jumped onto a dating website and am already getting responses from guys. It kills me to be lonely but the thought of getting intimate (emotionally or physically) with anyone makes me feel sad and I miss my ex even more. We had so many plans for the future. My family really liked him, he is great with my nieces and I always thought he would be there to protect me.
Please advise, I'm having a really rough time right now.