Wednesday, 10 October 2012

  • When Do I Ask Her Out?


    I met this girl at the Freshers Party a week ago. We've been texting since the following day. I haven't had a relationship previously and obviously, I'm not good at talking to girls as a result. Our texting is very infrequent, like one long text every hour and we've yet to talk on the phone.

    She has been sick recently and stopped texting altogether. Even though I've texted her, she hasn't replied at all.

    What should I do at this point in time?

    When would be the right time to ask her out for lunch, if at all?

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Comments (15)

  • Marica0701@xanga

    Stop texting and call her.


    (Texting as the main mode of communication irks me.)
  • Erika_Steele@xanga

    This post is slightly vague.  What do you "talk" about when you text each other? If she is sick, don't worry about her not texting.  If you are interested, ask her out.  The only thing she can say is no.  I'll leave it at that b/c dude, call her and ask her out already.
  • TeamBranham@xanga

    you might have already missedn the window of opportunity, but still ask her to an actvity you both enjoy. dont put pressure on each other. just enjoy each others company and the event
  • IcECaT123@xanga
    I'd say take a chance and just call her. if you guys clicked once in person, why not over the phone too ? maybe an event will come up over the take you both could attend.
  • miss_lyrical@xanga

    just call her and ask her out. if she says no, move on. no sense in sitting there torturing yourself thinking about this, just do it. good luck.
  • UnconventionalButterfly@xanga

    @miss_lyrical@xanga - agreed
  • TheNotoriousGOD@xanga

    as the *only* guy here who knows what he's talking about, you should probably listen to my advice before anyone else's.  (not to sound too cocky or anything.)  i think you missed the boat on this one, dude.  but, we are missing some important details:

    -how do you know she's sick?
    -how long has it been since she last responded to your messages, and how many times did you text her after that? 

    without knowing those things, the best i can say is that you text her in a few days saying "long time no speak, how are you?"  if she responds, give a friendly but SHORT response and say you should go get coffee (or whatever).  if not, don't follow up, it's game over.  honestly this is quite a long shot, but you have nothing to lose, as long as you don't creep on her.

    the good news here is that you are still SUPER young, so you have much time to grow and learn.  when i went to college i had 0 experience with girls.  just don't make the mistake i did and waste your first 2 years being sober and celibate. 

  • galliver@xanga

    I...for once I have to agree with @TheNotoriousGOD@xanga. Not responding to texts 'because you're sick' is kind of a weird excuse...I probably text/chat more when I'm sick than otherwise, but I guess some people may be different. So I'd give it a day or two in case she feels swamped with your messages (not that she necessarily is, but people don't make sense), then text or call to say you haven't heard from her and ask her out. Casually. (Yes, it's still worth a try.)

    Or if she actually gets back to you, that would be a good time.

    Good luck!
  • TheNotoriousGOD@xanga

    @galliver@xanga - for once??? 

  • Gaia

    The first and only thing you should do at this point is send her a text that says, "I hope you feel better soon."

    That's it. Period.

  • P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga

    it depends on what type of sickness she has. when I'm sick and on meds, I usually sleep a lot and don't feel like doing anything. if I have a cold, then it'll be a few days before I feel better, but I had bronchitis before and I was so sick and coughing nonstop that I barely had the energy to do much of anything let alone care to text. I was so tired, but couldn't sleep since I felt like I couldn't breathe! if I texted people saying that I felt like I was about to die and couldn't go out, they'd probably roll their eyes and think I was lying, but I was indeed sick that time. so she is either really sick and you caught her at a bad time, or she just isn't interested and making excuses. some guys noticed that I didn't log into my social profile for over a month because I was so sick that I didn't care about checking messages. they asked if I was okay. they probably thought that I was kidnapped than sick. I knew of a guy, who disappeared for about 2 weeks, and it turned out that he was sick. he had a fever and bad infection that caused so much pain that he was bedridden. he was working out too much at the gym and likely caught some type of virus while there via dirty workout equipment. eww. I sent him something sexy yet he didn't reply as usual, so I knew something was up. I was like...where did he go?? he appeared later healthy and sexier
  • kawasaki_saiyan@xanga

    Good luck!
  • wildchildofthebluemoon@xanga

    I, too, agree with @TheNotoriousGOD@xanga. You never really do know, but it goes both ways with men and women. If you make an effort to go out with her, and she digs you, she will make it happen.


    People do have really weird excuses for failing at texting back though. Ugh. Its a cell phone, people. If you don't want to have it with you all the time, get a damned home phone.
  • akarui_mitsukai@xanga

    First, call her up & be like "was just wondering if you were okay?" and if she says yes, then ask her out somewhere local for a common lunch. Don't even offer to pay unless she gives you the chance. Otherwise, it would be awkward. There will be better chances for that kind of stuff later if there's more to come. :) Best wishes! Always be a good guy, and may you get a deserving girl! :) *hugs*
  • P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga

    @TheNotoriousGOD@xanga - she means that you're usually deplorable and have no redeeming qualities.

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