Thursday, 27 September 2012
It is impossible to provoke me to the point of physical releases of aggression as a result of verbal provocation, and if the person happens to be female, you couldn't get me to physically fight back (on the offensive) even with physical provocation. I only fight if I know I'm going to win and there is nothing honorable or even remotely respectable about a male "winning" (if you can even call it that) against a female in a physical confrontation or against a person who doesn't want to fight.
In no way am I an "abusive" person and even if she were, I could handle it.
I am often insulted for being so assertive, expressive, and open about my frustration with my current romantic situation verbally, online, and in text because I am secure in knowing that I could never bring myself to hurt a female regardless of whether they are aware of it or not. I only mention this because saying that I'm not a violent/aggressive person is given no merit because I could be seen as a liar and before a relationship even begins, my reputation is already damaged because of other's lack of self-control.
Why, as a male, should I have to come off as being "polite" and "respectful" if the female in a relationship doesn't have to only for everyone to automatically assume the female is so weak and vulnerable? In my opinion there is a huge and sickening gender bias and double standard at play that leaves males forced to "act" like good guys EVEN WHEN THEY ARE GOOD GUYS, making them look "emotionally weak and immature" in comparison to females, while women can say whatever they please because they could never be just as aggressive, right?
I recently had many readers on Datingish call me controlling, abusive, manipulative, and many other negative things in regards to my behavior about a relationship with another Xangan. However, the fact that right in her video section there is a clip where she says she would break something over my head for saying 'the number of people a person has sex with correlates to their ability to trust/love a new partner' is totally overlooked.
All the while, I had the police called on me for trying to contact her after I had said, "You really don't want me as an enemy." (It was considered a threat in spite of the fact that I said it because after weeks of her ignoring me and being disrespectful when I would attempt to contact her, I couldn't help but think this was all a big game and she said and did the things she did deliberately to hurt me.)
I could've either done everything she told me to do and the relationship would've fallen apart because catering to her every want/need would make me look emotionally weak/pathetic to her (she ended up saying things along the lines of, "I want you to do it because you want to, not because I tell you or ask you to," only to later conclude we're not "compatible" because I shouldn't have to "change for her" I should "just be that way"), or I could've put her in her place like I'm doing now by telling her she was spoiled and impossible and she owed me the decency to talk to me about her feelings in a relationship we never mutually agreed to end (to which she and everyone else calls me emotionally abusive/controlling/manipulative).
If she's so weak and vulnerable and a victim, what right does she have to call me emotionally immature/childish and be all-around disrespectful if I can't argue back directly without law enforcement getting involved?
I only appear "weak" because if I show my strong side or any assertiveness whatsoever and attempt to contact her to resolve these issues, she automatically assumes I am a physical threat and is gone like the wind before I have a chance to explain myself and then have people threatening me with violence because I'm "abusive" or "stalking."
Does she not owe me the chance to maturely discuss our feelings so we can resolve these issues and continue where our relationship left off? That is, do I not deserve a chance to redeem myself after she falsely assumed I was a physical threat (as she clearly still blames me for her assumption)?
What do you think, readers? Is there a gender bias at play?