I have been single for a total of 4 months in the past 6 years. At the age of 18 I met my first love and we dated for 9 months. After that ended, I had 3 months to try and see what kind of game I had. Apparently the answer was “none.” I drunkenly made out with one guy from San Francisco at a party. He had a fake grill and it was not a high point in my life.
Then I met my next love and we dated for two years. At that point we broke up and I slept with an old friend. A few weeks later I ended up getting back with my boyfriend and was forced to feel pretty guilty about my hook up. Three years later, I am now resolutely single, but totally clueless about how to date without getting into a relationship.
I recently had my first first date in five years. It was with a nice guy I met at a bar. He was thoroughly vetted by the girlfriends I was having drinks with, and they approved me to take him up on his offer of cutting my hair (he is a hair stylist). The haircut was great and we had a lot in common, so I asked him out.
On the date, I learned that he had just gotten out of a 6 year relationship. I felt comforted knowing we were in the same boat, but worried he may have the same issue as me: not knowing how to keep things casual.
This was amplified by the fact that he asked me to hang out again the very next day. I was excited that he liked me enough to want to hang out again, but worried things may be moving too quickly.
Tell me lovelies, how do you keep things casual?