Never Say Never? | datingish

Wednesday, 12 September 2012

Never Say Never?

A few days ago, I listened to Taylor Swift's new single, "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together." It's no instant classic, but Swift is experimenting with a new poppy sound that is quite catchy. If you haven't heard it yet and don't passionately hate Swift, I recommend it.

Lyrics-wise, the song is as straightforward as the title suggests. Swift sings to her on-again/off-again boyfriend that this time, they are over for good and that they are "never ever getting back together."

But is that a good idea?

People always say, "Never say never" (yes, I know it's a paradox; no, it's not important). And in terms of trying out new things, it's wonderful. In terms of relationships, I really have no idea.

For example, a year ago I thought that I would never ever do a long-distance relationship, and spent much of my time telling people so. My boyfriend is currently in the Caribbean, while I live in New York.

That said, I am completely over my ex-boyfriend and can't imagine getting back together with him. We have issues that I doubt we'll ever be able to get over, even if we got back together by some miracle. Issues that I'm sure would destroy our relationship if left unresolved. So in some ways, I do agree with the sentiment of Swift's song.

Still, it's funny how the world works, and how people change. You never really know what's going to happen. So I wonder... when it comes to relationships, can you ever really say never?

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Comments (18)

Um, duh. No two relationships are alike. There will be some that you can say "absolutely never" and others where you can't say that.
- 9/12/2012 4:19 PM
- thegunslingergirl@xanga (message)
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I think it depends on the relationships themselves. If the person was abusive, I would think it's safe to say that it would be best if that relationship never resumed.
- 9/12/2012 4:27 PM
- babybug329@xanga (message)
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Two of my exes are married, and even if they got divorced I wouldn't ever get back with them. so yes never. and my third ex the one that i was only official with for 3 days -- too immature.
- 9/12/2012 4:49 PM
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I think 'never say never' is a good thing to live by, but it depends on the relationship, too. My ex cheated on me after being together for five years and was cheating on me for a year, I would NEVER get back together with him. If our relationship had ended temporarily because of long distance (which was what he had said in the beginning) there could be a chance of us getting back together. There's definitely instances when never is the very best option though.
- 9/12/2012 5:09 PM
- sunflowersforlove@xanga (message)
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the chanting part kinda reminds me of the We Are Young song by Fun. something about songs with echos that annoy me. the song would be ok if it weren't for the Ooohhhh...part. I will never get back together with someone if they made a song that annoying after the breakup. I usually can't stand songs sung by females, but I often like sweet songs than breakup songs. Hey There Delilah the "oHhhhh...what you do to me." sounds sexy than annoying when the Ohhhh is sung by a guy.
it depends on the reason for the breakup. if he's a traitor, never. otherwise, it might be negotiable.
- 9/12/2012 6:02 PM
- P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga (message)
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You can really say never if that person is dead, oops that sounds bitter.
- 9/12/2012 7:20 PM
- Living_just_2_breathe@xanga (message)
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"You never really know what's going to happen."
In a universe of probability that's a self-fulfilling prophecy. The more you believe it to be true, the less you try to find out what is going to happen.
"So I wonder... when it comes to relationships, can you ever really say never?"
Yeah, but that really isn't up to you to decide. Girls and their annoying little power trips.
It's one thing to say you never want to get back together, but taking it upon yourself to lay out his destiny for him is something else entirely.
- 9/12/2012 9:03 PM
- T3hZ10n@xanga (message)
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I think anybody can change in between when you knew them in a relationship, and when you know them in the here and now. Perhaps they've been with a few people since when you two were last a couple. They may have a few more years of life experience under their belt and be more suited towards a long-term relationship. Who knows?
- 9/12/2012 8:56 PM
- Gaia (message)
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when i entered college at age 17 i said i'd never drink or womanize, but we've all seen how that worked out for me.
i *do* use the word "never" when it comes to ego and/or dignity, though. i would never take back an ex. that's a move for bitches.
- 9/13/2012 1:02 AM
- TheNotoriousGOD@xanga (message)
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Eh, there are certain cases where I can pretty confidently say "never."
- 9/13/2012 10:27 AM
- AuCinema@xanga (message)
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That song is horrible.
- 9/13/2012 2:33 PM
- ninetailedevee@xanga (message)
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People change. Not everyone. But some people do change. So, I wouldn't say never. I mean I'm never getting back together with my ex, but that's mainly because I'm totally and completely in love with my boyfriend/fiance'. So, the other dude is completely out of the picture! :)
- 9/13/2012 3:03 PM
- xhalesx@revelife (message)
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I think you can only say "NEVER" when you've broken up so many times. Like if it is a reoccuring thing then that's a sign that a person should not attempt to get back together with that person because they obviously couldn't work things out. However, if it's a one time break up, anything is possible with time. The two people can either go their separate ways, or eventually realize they want to meet each other half way.
- 9/13/2012 3:50 PM
- StarApril25@xanga (message)
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lol a justin bieber quote a taylor swift song all in one post? hahaha
And to answer the question: No, anything is possible.
- 9/13/2012 10:28 PM
- nepenthium@xanga (message)
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I always said I never would, but I did, and it ended just the same way it did the first time. Now, I think I can firmly say I wouldn't do it - I've done it before and it was a disaster, so I doubt I'll ever try it again.
- 9/14/2012 1:33 AM
- notinwonderlandanymore@xanga (message)
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It's your decision to make, it's your destiny to take.

But sometimes, when we do really love the person, there's no "we are never ever getting back together", they'll make a way to get back together, no matter how hard life is. But as time passes by, everything will be different, like if you are giving up or already gave up, that's when you will say it.
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- 9/14/2012 11:16 AM
- adsegui@xanga (message)
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weird how some swift songs just start playing in my head when i go through another heartbreak
- 9/15/2012 12:36 AM
- f5ye_angel5@xanga (message)
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I had been having problems with my on boyfriend. We were together for a year and a half straight. Off and on for three years before that. Well. I found out he was lying to me one day and was sexting my one friend. Well i was devistated and went for a long drive. It just happened to be the day this song came out. and I have been okay ever since :P <3
- 9/25/2012 2:57 PM
- star_shine_quotes@xanga (message)
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