How I have missed you and your witty, biting charm! The last time I wrote, I said I was taking a break and would return. Well, here I am again and no longer all that single... but how that came about is another story for another day. My issue is this: We have been dating for two months and everything is great.
I mean, he's not perfect, but who is? He treats me wonderfully, he does things for me and is always taking care of me and providing for me, even though we don't live together. However, it seems like, especially here lately, that I have been getting bent out of shape and blowing things he does way out of proportion. IE: tonight we were playfully wrestling and he scraped my brand new tattoo on the top of my foot and made it bleed.
I got mad because he said he didn't do it, I must have done it myself, until we noticed the green ink under his toenail. (Can you say BUSTED?!) I am getting to that point where we are getting fairly serious and my "fight or flight" instincts are kicking in. I KNOW he is NOT my ex, but every time I get to the point where I am this serious about a guy, my "fight or flight" kicks in and I usually end up running. I don't want to run this time, but I feel the overwhelming urge to
. Every time he does something that I don't like or hurts my feelings I think, "See, he is just like all the rest, he is going to hurt you or break your heart." We already got into a huge fight and almost broke up because this girl he knows text him, coming onto him, even though he swore he didn't take it that way.
So, I want your opinions. Have you ever had the urge to run from a relationship because a prior relationship was abusive/ negative?
I don't want the past to ruin my future, but I can't help but be scared and want to run away as fast as I can.
As always, please be gentle, this is my heart you are dealing with and I look forward to hearing your opinions!
The Single Girl