Idk. That photo is fucking hot.

Regardless of whether or not people were born gay or went through a phase, I think it's up to the person to really know what they want. In the end, it's the person's final say of whether they are straight, gay, or bisexual. I understand the point you are trying to make (and it has a lot of logic behind it), but mainly, I think it's up to the individual's point of view and what they know they are. 

What i'm more worried about is that you have feelings for somebody while you're with your boyfriend. To me, that's emotionally cheating no mater the gender of the "other person". If you know you're going to break up why stay together, deny your feelings for this girl and what could potentially end up being a great relationship?

This is an interesting post and I agree, I don't believe people are born gay, that is just ludicrous.  That's like saying they are born murderers, or born presidents.  Come on, see my point?

If you truly feel something for this girl, don't shove it in a corner and forget about it.  That is what being young is all about, "explore".  I mean come on, you only live once and there is no reason to live with regrets.  I'm not saying you have to marry the girl, in fact you can stay in the perverbial closet if you are uncomfortable with it.  I'm just saying, enjoy life to the fullest.

@P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga - LMAO

@olwd@xanga - As @Nous_Apeiron@xanga said, "Sexuality is a spectrum...". A spectrum that includes the "dimension" of time (I hate that people refer to time as a dimension) is a continuum. To put it simply, sexuality is as fluid as you allow it to be. If you don't have sex with females, you're not bisexual.

I think sexuality is too fluid to put a label on. I mean, pretty much everyone who claims they're 100% straight can appreciate a good-looking person of the same sex, and vice versa with people who claim to be 100% gay. I don't necessarily think you're born one way or the other, but I also don't think you can choose which gender you're attracted to, just like you can't force yourself to find someone attractive. I don't think people in countries like Rwanda (where homosexuality is punishable by death) would choose to find people of the same sex attractive if it wasn't something they had no control over.

@T3hZ10n@xanga - LOL, a little Bi.  LOL  oh dear

@daydreams_nightmares@xanga - Wow, so happy I don't live in Rwanda!  Yikes!

I used to hook up with girls... I even thought I was a lesbian for a while. I guess for me it was mostly a phase. I got sick of girls pretty quick. I am just not cut out to deal with their bullshit on that level. Having close girl friends is hard enough.

So I guess I chose to be straight. I do find myself a lot more attracted to guys than I was at one point... but at that point almost all my sexual interests were completely different. People evolve. I still hit on girls when I'm drunk, and sometimes fantasize about them, but rarely.

I think you can realize your sexual orientation at a very young age, even too early to remember a time earlier, but I don't think it's a gene. My gay friends argue this with me all the time. Most of who you are as a person is not genetically predetermined, even if you feel you have no control over it. No you cannot control who you are sexually attracted to. But you can:

1. control who you actually do sleep with

2. learn from your past and become turned off by things you once looked for in a partner

Some people would consider me a lesbian, some would consider me bi-curious at best. Does it really matter what you call it? Just do what feels right to you. And if it starts to feel wrong, you can always stop. You don't have to force yourself into a box (hehe) just to fit the definitions you've been given on sexuality. It's fluid, it evolves, it isn't black and white and it isn't genetic.

When I hear people using the argument, “Why would you CHOOSE to be gay? Of COURSE they were born gay!” I think about how much that cuts out of the human spectrum and how ignorant it is of world influence.

It sounds like you just have a problem with the phrasing:  while I agree that it's probably not *just* genetics that determine a person's sexuality, the argument of "born gay" is that people cannot help who they're attracted to.  And while I agree that environment plays a huge role in it -- I think that's why a lot of gay men got married and had kids "back in the day", -- genetics (or whatever) also plays a strong part because that led to a lot of unhappy marriages & divorces since...y'know, they were gay & couldn't help it.  

I'm sure there are also people who've had homosexual experiences and gone on to lead otherwise heterosexual lives (and vice versa), but nobody documents them because these people are confident enough in their sexuality to know who they are and not let that "one time at band camp" mess with who they know they are.  

Basically, it's up to you to determine how you identify yourself because no one else can know what's going on inside your head; other people shouldn't be labeling you so don't let them tell you what you are / aren't.  (I guess you missed that part in the episode where Blaine basically says that to Kurt after he gets mad about the kiss w/Rachel)

You're just confused. The answer is simple: did you CHOOSE to fall in love with a girl in the eighth grade or was it something that just happened? Maybe that doesn't make you permanently or exclusively gay. But it definitely means you need to reevaluate what being straight means to you. 

The "people don't choose to be gay" argument stems from the emotional aspect rather than the physical aspect. I realize everyone is different, but who has ever said, "Damn, I really, really, really wish I were attracted to her but I'm just too damn straight. I guess I'll have to work harder at being a lesbian. But every time I think about going down on a girl, I want to puke. I'm really going to have to work at that."

Acting upon one versus the other doesn't mean you don't have the capacity to swing either way. It obviously means that you do have that capacity if you had to make a choice.

It's not even that there necessarily would have to be a gene that is the decision maker for someone to be born gay or straight. Hormone levels pre-birth also play a roll in our sexual/gender identity. Even in the womb, we are exposed to the "nurture" aspect in the nature vs. nurture argument.

For some people, sexuality is fluid. For some, it's completely rigid. Heck, even rigidity and fluidity can change within the same person.