This post was submitted anonymously.
I have a friend named "Alice," and she has just been dumped- hard. She was dating this guy "Benjamin" for a few months. Then, last June, Benjamin dumped her. It came as a complete surprise to Alice but not to the rest of us because basically Benjamin was a jerk. He treated Alice really badly, like he was doing her some huge favor by dating her. He clearly thought he could do better and every time I saw the two of them at a party, Benjamin was always trying to flirt with one of Alice's classmates.
Total douche, seriously.
Anyway, apparently Benjamin had a HUGE crush on Alice's pal "Caroline," but Benjamin never had the guts to ask Caroline out because she had a boyfriend of her own. Finally one night when we all went out for karaoke, I ended up making out with some middle-aged Korean dude (don't ask), Alice spent half the evening puking up marshmallow vodka and Benjamin ended up confessing all his feelings to Caroline at the bar. (I have no idea where Caroline's boyfriend was at that moment. I know he came out with us that evening, though.)
Caroline subsequently decided to break up with her boyfriend and date Benjamin.
Benjamin dumped Alice and now he and Caroline have smoochy, happy, golden photos all over Facebook. Alice is devastated. I've tried-I mean, TRIED-to be a good friend to Alice! Seriously! I've taken her out to Starbucks and asked her if she wanted to talk about it and everything, but it's all been a bust.
Alice just sits there and mopes or cries. She looks at other hot chicks in the room and says, "If I looked like that, I bet Benjamin wouldn't have dumped me." She asks how long me and other friends "knew" about Benjamin's feelings for Caroline. Then she cries again. It has been such a drag to be around her lately. All my other friends say that I have to wait it out, but I just don't know what to do.
What do you say to a friend who's just been dumped besides the usual clichés?