Last month, I spent a weekend at my aunt and uncle's house. They have a pet dog named Glory, who my aunt and cousins love. My uncle? Not so much. According to my aunt, my uncle far prefers cats to dogs, while my aunt is the other way around. When they first got married, they had a cat for several years. But when the cat died, they got not a cat but Glory, a hyperactive border collie.
My uncle tolerates Glory, and treats her as part of the family. He just isn't quite as affectionate with Glory as he was with their late feline.
This got me thinking about pets and the role they can play in relationships.
When I was very little, I was terrified of dogs. But at 7 years old, my parents got a tiny black labrador who we named Danny. 14 years later, Danny is much bigger, older, and spends most of his day fast asleep. And I have turned into a huge dog-lover. So much so that I'm not sure that I could date someone who hated them.
Of course, I don't have a dog of my own quite yet, since Danny spends his days in Tokyo with my parents. But I plan to get one as soon as I'm financially stable and stay in the same place for long enough. I love dogs, and I see them as a staple part of my future life.
So a guy who hates dogs? Maybe if I really really REALLY liked him. But probably not.
There's also the fact that I secretly judge people who don't like dogs, including my former 5-year-old self. Dogs are adorable and full of unconditional love. How can you not like them?
As for cats? They're cute, but I'm not huge fans of them. Also, I'm allergic, so I'd have trouble living with a cat, if it came to that.
Other pets I would probably be OK with, presuming they weren't hugely dangerous exotic animals. But it would depend on the pet, and ultimately, on the person.
What do you think? How has your pet affected your relationships?Image Source
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Comments (26)
I don't think I could date someone who didn't like my cat, or someone who didn't like cats in general. Thankfully, though, my crush loves my cat...(maybe even more than he likes me.) And my cat loves him. She follows him everywhere when he's at my house. She even waits outside the bathroom door if he goes in there. If he and I ever got together and moved in together, I sometimes wonder if my cat would suddenly decide he was the center of the universe and forget about me. lol. But I'd rather have that than someone who hates my cat.
My fiance hates dogs. He claims to hate my two but I still catch him loving on them all the time. :)
I love cats and dogs and rodents... but not snakes. If my partner would have a snake, I probably wouldn't mind as long as she doesn't force me to get in contact with it.
i couldn't date someone who hated cats or dogs. my boyfriend doesn't like cats but he puts up with and is civil with my cats, even though he's allergic. i know if we end up moving in together i can't get another cat, but if my cat reese is still alive he'll come with us until he passes away. it's a compromise. we WILL get a dog or two though. i've had a guy that i was once interested in talk about kicking a cat and i immediately dropped him on his ass. if you have that kind of regard for furry little animals i don't want you anywhere near my life.
I could never date somebody who doesn't like Animals.
I wouldn't date someone who couldn't stand animals. I'm an animal lover, my current boyfriend has a cat (and is completely biased towards his cat and cats in general), and I have four lovebirds. It's implied for both of us that the animals a) came first, b) aren't going anywhere, and c) are non-negotiable. With that said, any future pets between both of us need to be a joint decision and investment regardless.
I used to be terrified of animals when I was a kid. We never had any pets, except for a goldfish my sister won at a carnival, but that lasted about 1 month. Other than that, no pets. My husband loved dogs. He had one when we were first dating--I was still scared but I slowly warmed up to them. Now I am not afraid, but I am not one to go pet other people's dogs unless I have become acquainted with them. If the prospective date owns pets and I don't care for them, I will have to deal with them because he already had them. It would be unreasonable to ask him to get rid of them, wouldn't it? Likewise, I wouldn't want someone to ask me to get rid of my beloved meow meows because he didn't like them.
I don't really care for pets, but my relative's dog kneels down on his paws and wags his tail whenever he sees me. I think he is saying...I worship you. Would you play with me
then he follows me and is eagerly expecting that I throw his dog toy for him to fetch like his owners often do, but I don't. he sniffs my leg and continues to wag his tail as he wants to play badly! I don't want to play though. I ignore the dog every time but he doesn't care and kneels to worship me every time he sees me
no wonder they say that dogs are their best friend; human best friends don't kneel/bow down in respect to greet me. the dog is exactly like that dog in the UP movie where he tells the human that he has just met him but already loves him
as long as the dog doesn't jump up and lick me, which I hate, then I'm okay with them. as with kids, I'll hang around them for a while, but I won't have one for long term or babysit long term. I prefer low maintenance pets. I used to have a turtle and he was the best turtle ever. he didn't really bother me and gave me my space and I did the same
well, he didn't really have a choice since he can't jump over the tub that I kept him in. he tried to escape when I let him out to play in the sun. he is an explorer
I also judge people who don't like dogs. Like how I call my bf a loser for thinking cats are better. He's changed his mind though.
We have two cats both rescues would love a dog though! Ones mama came to our back door begging for food, someone threw her out when she was pregnant and we kept the lightest color kitten (Simba now 16 pds) since i seemed to react terribly to darker cats . I was allergic to cats for years and it has faded away, which is great becuase i love cats, i still react when i meet a new cat but then im fine after that! Then Milo 6-7 pds was a friends cat who was her baby for years until she had a baby and stopped taking care of him! Her husband was mean to him any way would pick him up and toss him and push him away and scare him every chance he got. He started peeing all over her house, not so much becuase he was bad or sick but becuase she wasnt feeding him or changing his liter box. Despite be petrified and skittish he has never had a single accident with us. Im so proud of little man he has really come out of his shell his coat is glossy and he isnt dull and no longer constantly sheds, when someone comes over he goes right up to them and says hi, accept his previous owners he still hides from them. The friend came over about a year later and was shocked we still had him. I talked to her recenty she metioned she wanted another cat i told her the apartment only allows us two so we couldnt take any more for her. Her husband wantes a dog and she refuses so he will just keep mistreating any cat she gets. I also had a bird for 10 years precious passed away in april, i was devastated my baby was gone. My familys dog Missy is still hanging in there she just turned 13 she is a Golden, love her to pieces when she is gone it will be very hard on all of us. I love all animals tho they all have their personalities and quarks. Milo loves to cuddle and be scrated all over accept his head and simba wont cuddle at all and doesnt like to be touched anywhere but his head.
@wing_stock@xanga - I used to be afraid of dogs because of an accident when I was 6, a dog I had known for years bit me all the way through my lip when I was petting it. I still am a little nervous around bigger dogs, but have adopted a now medium sized dog :)
Pets are very important in my life. I live in a household with four dogs and a cat. One of the dogs is mine. I also technically have a cat that lives up in Iowa with my aunt right now. I'm going to bring her down as soon as I can or get her when I move up. It all depends on which ever comes first. When you bring a pet into your home, they are your responsiblity. I can't stress that enough and I take responsiblity for my pets. I couldn't date anyone that wasn't willing to have them around or ultimately didn't like them. It just goes directly against my nature and what I value in life.
As for how pets have effected my relationships in the past, I'd say it's been an overall good experience. One of my more serious exes had/has a dog named Missy. He has other dogs in the house, but that's his dog. He got along with my dog, Akela, which was great. Missy, on the other hand, was overly protective of my ex. It took time, but she eventually warmed up to me. I adored her. She's the cutest min-pin ever, but it did take time and patience for her to even like me. It eventually got to the point where she would even cuddle with me. Part of why my ex and I lasted so long is because we could connect with our love of our pets. That's just an example of what I mean.
I think as long as your partner doesn't mind you having the pet, it doesn't really matter if they just tolerate them or actually like them. Of course it would be better if you did both love the animal, but they'll probably come to love it over the years anyway. :)
Luckily my BF and I both like/love cats and aren't very keen on dogs- they're often cute and we always comment on ones we see on the street, but we're unlikely to ever get one. If I ended up with someone who did want a dog, though, I probably wouldn't mind. ^^
One of my friends HATES cats and says they don't have souls, but loves dogs. I don't judge him much for it because if we ever ended up living together (and with a cat), I think I could convert him. >:3
My hubby hates any pets in the house that can't be kept in a cage. Hence, we have no pets in the house that can't be kept in cages. I hate that. No brownie points for him! I really want a cat at the very least; something cuddly and unconditionally loving.
It would be a huge dealbreaker if the guy I dated didn't like dogs.
Thankfully, my boyfriend loves dogs. :)
I had the issue of loving cats and tolerating dogs. There are a lot of cats out there that have wonderful, loving personalities while just being a lot cleaner than dogs. If I'd never owned cats like that, I probably would agree that people are strange for not liking dogs.
Anyway, the fiance ended up being allergic to cats, so I had to start pushing my tolerance for dogs into something better. I ended up with a golden retriever, who is a lovable mess of a family member. I am considering getting rid of all black furniture and clothing in the house - even so, she definitely is a sweetie. It's such a love-hate relationship!
...and she's such an energetic bull that she's skull bashed me on two occasions as I was getting up in the morning. One time I passed out and had to skip work! She's actually caused a couple of injuries too, just from being unable to control herself. She's getting better as she gets older... but man, don't call someone crazy for preferring cats. Loving family cats exist without all of the downsides that dogs can bring to the picture. Lastly, there's a such thing as liking dogs, but not necessarily preferring to live with them. That's what I consider myself.
I couldn't date anyone who would end up making me not have a pet. I have cats, chinchillas, and a snake. When I get a house, I'll also have a couple dogs. My chinchillas both have about 20 years of their lives left, and my cats have somewhere in the area of 10. Add a dog to that, and I'll have them all for at least the next 12 to 15 years. If a guy isn't okay with that, then it won't work between us. (Oh, and I'll be in vet school soon.)
I fucking hate dogs in my house. You own a dog great. I like other people's dogs just fine. They ARE fun to play with, but just like a child I want to hand them back and not have them in my house. Dogs shed way more than cats and they are WAY too damn needy. You say unconventional love and I say needy. There is also having to pick up there steaming piles of shit. With a large or medium sized dog (because small dogs shouldn't exist) their poop is a lot compared to a cat and picking it up with a plastic baggie is just disgusting in comparison to scooping cat litter. I hate that too mind you, but if I have to choose I choose litter. All this being said I let my last girlfriend, who was living in my house, get a dog. I loved playing with him, etc., but because of him my anxiety and panic disorder kicked in full time and I had to go back on anxiety meds, which I did not have tobe on for 3 years. He is gone now and I am slowly weaning myself off the meds again. Dogs suck in my house. I will never date another dog lover again.
I love animals and any man or woman who wants to be with me must be ok with me owning pets. I grew up with dogs, cats, fish, and frogs...and random injured wildlife that we took care of.
I am in the same boat as you. Major dog-loving, could not date someone who hates dogs. One of my two deal breakers (other being a smoker). Nothing against cats, but I'm terribly allergic and couldn't see myself dating someone who has a cat. I'd be miserable staying at his place, and couldn't sleep in his bed in the cat ever gets on it. Been there, done that with my best friend, which isn't a big deal because I didn't stay the night at her house that often. But I felt like crap, even with allergy meds.
So wouldn't date someone who would be opposed to a canine presence, and couldn't date a cat owner.
i wouldn't last in a relationship with someone who hated dogs or cats because i couldn't imagine my life without pets. the only real valid excuse for not wanting pets is when people are deathly allergic. i wouldn't judge that person for not wanting pets, but i wouldn't give up my animals to be with them.
my boyfriend loves dogs, but my dog is very very overprotective of me. they have a pretty cute love-hate relationship, because when we first started dating, my dog (a soon-to-be 10-year-old black lab) wouldn't even let us sit next to each other or hold hands! he doesn't bite and isn't vicious, but he would bark and cry loudly or jump in between us/on my boyfriend, haha. one time he went in for a hug and my dog (who is pretty huge) jumped in the middle and pushed his arms down with his paws. :p we've been together for over a year now and my dog has become more relaxed and will let us lay together and show more affection, but he still hates it when we kiss! he'll try to distract us when we start kissing by running over and dropping his tennis ball in my lap and barking at me until i throw it. he has some jealousy issues but i don't blame him, we've grown up together and he's just trying to protect me. my boyfriend is definitely used to it now and while he claims that he has a "war" going on with my dog, i catch them playing together a lot haha.
I always said I would never marry a man who won't let me have my animals, because that's how my dad was, but I am a HUGE animal person. I had been caring for injured, sick or abandoned animals since I was 10, went to Equestrian college & plan on a farm with many animals. I know if I had no animals, I would be absolutely miserable, so I couldn't fall in love with someone who doesn't want animals.
As far a specific animal goes, I actually need a dog because between horses & the couple cows I plan on having, I want something that herds. I also want something to protect us. I love cats, but my cat would probably barely wake up from her nap if an intruder was attacking me.
My boyfriend and I have discussed this. When we get married, we will have no pets. Certainly no indoor pets. I have a rabbit right now. So that is probably the only pet we will have for a VERY long time.