Sunday, 29 July 2012
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Do Attractive People Suck in Bed?

Recently, I've been thinking about whether or not good-looking people make equally good pleasure partners. I say this based on my (admittedly limited) experiences with two attractive guys. They were both definitely more experienced than me (we talked about our pasts) yet incredibly so-so with their techniques.
For example, a good ol' makeout session: Guy 1 was way too aggressive and sloppy even after I told him so (alas, me trying to lead him just led to more of the same) and Guy 2 was basically a limp fish, passive until I kissed him and even then very blah with his interaction. Being a HUGE romantic (books and movies have maybe ruined me for life), I *might* have had some unrealistic expectations about how skilled attractive guys should be, but I didn't think they were that unrealistic.
I had great chemistry with both of them - intellectual, emotional, and physical with Guy 1 (we were in a relationship for a short time) and mostly just physical with Guy 2 (yes, hookup, though we had a longer history of being sort-of friends/flirts). Considering I didn't have much experience myself, I warned them beforehand and kept up that open communication channel during and after (because honesty is a big thing for me).
In this way I could learn, so to speak, and they wouldn't be offended if I had any critiques. (Before you start about "discussion" ruining the mood, I went on to have more "sessions" with both of them, so I seriously doubt there was a negative impact on their libidos.) Welp, they didn't have much to teach me and didn't do much for me in that sense (one of the reasons things obviously didn't last with either guy), and I've been wondering ever since if good-looking people are really as sexually able as they're stereotyped to be.A short scene from one of my favorite movies, Ten Inch Hero, has the shop owner, cook, and hot waitress arguing about looks and how truly indicative they are of one's abilities in bed. Both the shop owner and cook think good-looking women (and by extension, good-looking people in general) are fairly mediocre in bed (C grade) because they don't have to try so hard.
The guy is so grateful to just have her with him that he doesn't care, so the beautiful woman goes through life blissfully unaware of her lack of prowess in the sack. Of course, the waitress argues that's not so because she thinks she's hot shit, but if you watch the rest of the movie, she's kinda wrong.So, readers, I ask: In your opinion, do you think there is validity to the stereotype of attractive people (however you define good looks) making great lovers? I'd love to hear about your perspectives, especially if you wouldn't mind sharing stories from personal experience.
As always, thanks for your consideration!
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Comments (38)
For real, I ain't never really been with no ugly girls, so this is hard to answer.
For real, I ain't never really been with but 1 girl, so this be vurry turribul to conceive upon.
Did I ever mention I'm evil?
I am ridiculously awesome in bed! ......aw crap.
Yes, you can establish a correlation with a sample of two. In my experience, ability in bed is in no way correlated with looks.
is ten inch hero a porno? cause it sure as shit sounds like it.
so, here's a fun little statistical fact. 2 data points aren't enough to draw conclusions about an infinitely-sized population. what that means is that you need a larger sample size.
it sounds like a pretty dangerous mission, but i'm willing to take one for the team and bang a lot of good-looking girls to see if there's any observable difference.
by the way, it sounds like guy 2 was bad with you because he wasn't into you.
i resent this. i'm awesome in bed and i think i'm goodlooking.
also the best looking guys i've been with have been the best in bed.
Hispanic women are great in bed.
@TheNotoriousGOD@xanga - Oy, genius, if you can draw conclusions about an infinitely-sized population from 2 data points, it's not statistical... it's binary. So it's not a "drawn conclusion", it's the fact of the matter, and statistics do not apply. So statistically, you're right, but in reality, you're wrong.
Here's a fun huge true fact:
Zion's 1st Law of Cognitive Neurophysics
No two things are ever the same. If they are the same, they are one thing.
Observable differences ≠An exhaustive list of all differences.
I generally think that way heh. The girls I've known who think they're hot and get hit on way too often, or get any guy they want based purely on how they look tend to be the worst in bed. I think it's more of a fact that they haven't had the need nor desire to try, they get it without needing to practice/try/whatever so they think what they're doing is the way to do it. Not that means ugly girls are going to be great in bed, just seems that so called 'hot' people tend to be less impressive and worse than average people. If they're more aware of themselves and spend time to realize it they're not bad. Same can go for 'hot' guys or guys with big penises, who know they're big and flaunt it. They tend to not do much because they haven't had to before. Heard waaay too many girls complain about how some guy was so proud of how attractive or big he was, but then turned out to be horrible in bed. Of course that's not always true, but you know seems to be the way it goes. Though the girl could also just suck so the guys don't wanna put in any effort? Dunno.
@T3hZ10n@xanga - oy, genius. when you get a degree, move out of your parents' house, and get paid to know what you're talking about, maybe i'll start to take you seriously.
@eatdrinkandbemaryy@xanga - "i'm awesome in bed and i think i'm goodlooking."
This post is examining the opinions of the people that slept with you, so of course you'd resent this, because you don't have sex with yourself, nor do you have a say in other people's opinions of you that have.
@TheNotoriousGOD@xanga - Lol... I share my wisdom free of charge so you have nothing to lose if I'm wrong.
If I don't get paid to know what I'm talking about, I have no incentive to slack off, now do I?
Take deez nuts seriously.
http://youtu.be/YOshf_FeG6c
No, it all depends on the chemistry between the two people. If your partner "sucks", it doesn't always mean it's their problem, it can probably mean that they're put off by your body, lack of enthusiasm or otherwise.
I'm not attractive and I suck in bed.
I agree with you - generally, the hotter the guy, the less he has to try, and the more clueless he is in bed. My best lover was not the best looking guy in the world- but oh man, he could make me scream....
But I also think it's a little deeper than hot=bad in bed, and ugly=amazing in bed. It's more about passion for your partner. If your ego is SO HUGE that you're obsessed with yourself and how hot you are, and how your partner should WORSHIP the ground you walk on, you're not going to be a giving lover. But when you are humble and adore your partner with all the love and respect in the world, you will do everything in your power to pleasure them. And when two people like that come together, you have amazing sex.
This is stupid. Looks have no bearing on how good or terrible you are ~ it's about chemistry and experience.
One time I was having a threesome and the guy who was doing me wasn't hot, so I couldn't feel much, but once the other guy who I was in love with started kissing me I became super wet and started to cum. It's all about looks I think.
I think penis size, breasts, how their body looks, and stuff like that matters too. It shows that they know how to fill their inner needs and take care of themselves, and then I feel like they'll take care of me and our future kids too. Looks are very important. It's weird how these days we try to say that they're not. I don't understand what they're talking about.
Sure, we should make an exception for the guy who gets hit by a car and looks like a pizza, but I'm happy to say that I don't like fat guys with little dicks who can't get an erection because they keep stuffing themselves with food and have little self control. It's their fault that they have diabetes and it says lots about their inner self.
I still like fat guys though. A lot of them have big penises and really pleasure me. Some of them are really funny and make me laugh lots too. I'm just saying physical features tell you lots about someone's character, that's all.
I think that's why I find more pleasure in good looking boys.
the shy/quiet ones are usually hot freaks in bed
I'm mostly talking about me
it depends. the freakiest guys that I knew were older than me. guys around my age that I knew weren't that freaky. I don't just mean sex, but I also size up their overall naughtiness via dirty talk and just them telling me about their fantasies in general. I'm not satisfied with just sex. I like guys to be major teases just like me. one guy was about 3 years younger than me, but he was just about as naughty as the older ones that I knew. he was very good looking, great style, super toned body, and he had a big joystick. I usually don't prefer white guys but he was mixed black and he was just that much sexier to me because idk, and maybe I'm feeding into the stereotype, but he just oozes testosterone and incredibly hot to me. so just thinking about him turns me on and I think my premeditated horny thoughts about him causes me to find him that much more pleasing to my eyes, thoughts and body
maybe you aren't passionate about these guys enough or vice versa, so you just aren't that into each other to feel the passion with each other. I don't really find guys with thin arms sexually appealing, because it just reminds me of my own girly thin arms lol and I can't imagine them in that way or I mean if I can't picture the guy effortlessly lifting me up and carrying me in his arms with his powerful arms, then I don't think that I'd be that enthusiastic with sexual thoughts about him. not that guys, who aren't buff don't have testosterone, because they still do, or that buff guys are better in bed because they seem to have more testosterone, and I'm not going to automatically be sexually attracted to any old buff guys, because I'm not. there is more to it than that. or there could be exceptions, because my two crushes at work don't have buff bodies. one is slightly out of shape but he still looks so sexy to me-his voice captured my attention, and the other is tall and slim, but he is so handsome, so I'm already mesmerized by his face to really mind that he isn't toned as the other guys, but who knows, since he wears a suit and I haven't seen him naked. he could have one of those slim and ultra toned bodies that aren't flashy, but he outshines the rest overall. I'd choose him over the other buff guys that I talked about. he has the height advantage that I find hot. so average height buff good looking guys versus tall and slim with super gorgeous smile, the smile often wins me over:) that's just me. to each their own. you can't really know until you know. I don't sleep around, so I wouldn't really know lol
hmm. ive mostly had sex with ridiculously good looking dudes in the past and they are all pretty good. with the exception of one dude that cannot get it up and one that cannot finish without oral. -__x. i would think the opposite is true. since logically the better looking you are the easier it is for one to get laid and the more you get laid the better you are at it(hopefully).
I don't think you can ever answer this because beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and sexual chemistry always varies.
My boyfriend is so good , I love love having sex , he makes me feel so beautiful and pleasures me in all the right ways. We have the greatest chemistry in everything.
Mind you, he is not super hot, but to me he is.
It's really dumb to think that attractive people are good in bed. I can see why people might make that assumption but I wouldn't. I agree with whoever said, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
Doesn't there need to do some kinna foreplay first before she goes all oral on him ?
I think it's more to do with the fact that most humans are not good at sex at all, despite their interest in the subject. Being good at sex is all mental. It takes experience, creativity, a lack of inhibitions, and the emotional maturity to deal with giving and recieving pleasure. Also, quality bondage gear...