Saturday, 28 July 2012
I'm not a feminist. I'm not a "masculist" (or whatever that would be called). I'm a dreamer. You can call it as you see it as you read through this post, but I'm simply a dreamer all the way. So I'm sure most won't understand this post. I hope I'm wrong, though.
Feminism is responsible for a lot of awesome things. We can now vote, go to school, get real jobs and make it just as far as a man could in life. I know you hear a lot of, "women get paid less than men," but that must vary depending on the field because I have always been paid equally with men. But there are some of us out there who are maybe considered "old-fashioned," or even sexist, if you want to go to the extreme, simply because they like how certain things used to be.
My big thing is getting asked out. Call me whatever you want to call me, but I have never asked a guy out. I don't want to. You see, dating is somewhat of a game. You flirt your ass off. He asks you out. You stress over what to wear and how much make-up you should cake onto your face. He leans in for the kiss. You close the gap and poof! A connection is made (well, possibly).
There used to be a time where a man and a woman each played a certain role in the dating game. And every now and again you do find men who still agree with the "old-fashioned" ways, but I've found that our roles are now very screwed up.
I firmly believe in a "to each her own" attitude. As long as you're not hurting anyone else, do and like what you want. But I really hate it when someone's opinion suddenly becomes the social norm and you can either get on board, suffer because of it, or look picky because you're not comfortable with it. But that's the bottom line here. I'm not comfortable asking a guy out. You see, I'm not a girly girl at all. I love my jeans and sneakers, I prefer to be the one holding the door open and I can change my own oil.
But I grew up sneaking copies of Cosmo and Glamour instead of Seventeen, so I had this idea in my head of how dating would be. I started dating around fifteen and from then until I hit twenty, I had always been asked out. Then, as I began to hit up the bars more, I found quite a few guys to flirt with. So I would flirt... and flirt... and flirt... and the whole time I would feel this pressing expectation, like he expected me to say something like, "Hey, I just met you and this is crazy..."
Things are different these days, and I know it's either get with it or get left behind. But I suppose this is one tradition I didn't want to see die out. I still haven't asked a guy out, and I don't think I ever will. To me, being asked out is a guy showing me that he's a man. He's confident enough to go for what he wants and he's not afraid of rejection. Maybe I will find myself waiting around for that guy for awhile, but that's okay. Maybe I'll just go south and find myself a country boy. But for now I simply tell myself that I know what I want and that's all that matters.
Am I alone, here? Are there any other girls out there who feel like this?