I dated this guy for a couple months and I broke up with him because my feelings started fading. We didn't talk for about 2 years, but randomly the other day he added me on Facebook.
I was thrown off and didn't really know what to do, say, or expect. He stopped talking to me after we broke up because he started seeing a girl that really didn't like me. It made no sense to me because he and I were really good friends. Anyways, I accepted it because I heard that they broke up and I just wanted my friendship back.
I've been with my current boyfriend for almost 2 years so right when he started talking to me, I let him know how happy I've been and how I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. He seemed happy for me. We talked almost every other day for a while but then randomly, he wouldn't answer me-so I stopped trying to text him and talk to him.
We didn't talk for almost a month so I decided I should try to text him. When I did, the first thing he said to me was, "I have a girlfriend...." I didn't know what to say so I just said, "And I have a boyfriend; I thought we were friends?"
Right before that, he was telling me he still loved me? I don't get guys.
It seems to me like he was hoping that i would dump my boyfriend for him but when I didn't, he went to the first girl he could get.
What do you think?
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Comments (13)
I think you're right. He added you and started talking to you because he was in between relationships. He was probably bored, and wanted to see if he could start something up, maybe just to see if he could break you and your guy up, or just to have a FWB thing until he found someone else. Once he found someone else, he didn't need to talk to you anymore. Some guys are like that, and not the good ones.
I think you are reading way too much into his intentions unless you left something out. Maybe he just attracts overly possessive and jealous women and whoever he is with doesn't want him talking to an ex girlfriend. Even if he does still love you and wanted you to leave your boyfriend, why does it matter if you love your boyfriend? Do you really expect him to just pine for you and never attempt other relationships or something?
he wants to distance himself from you out of respect for his new gf since he still loves you and you already have a bf that you're happy with, so there's nothing that he can really do about that, and you didn't say that you still loved him, too, which you don't have to if you don't feel the same. he felt that there is no more hope left since you didn't reciprocate the secret feelings that he hoped that you'd been hiding inside, but you moved on so he found a new gf, which I hope isn't a rebound and he's using her. so he decided that he wants to devote more time into his actual gf than a past friend that he barely talked to. I don't think that you'd feel comfortable if your bf still hangs out or talks to a girl that he still loves or is fond of in a more than friendship way. if you accepted it before, then accept it again. you didn't talk to him for 2 years and moved on. he did ditched you again, so just don't talk to him again if he tries to talk to you since you know he is a flimsy friend that comes and goes whenever he pleases.
Just checking...RANDOMLY added you on FB?
I mean, last I checked, someone had to submit a friend request, and get it confirmed etc etc.
Not so random.
anyway...he was bored, lonely, thought he'd check in with you. It was fun to reconnect, but you are taken. Then he got interested in someone who was available...NEXT!
I think he's not your friend. Don't waste any more time on him.
You have a boyfriend. Who cares.
women...
a guy would never talk to a woman hes not in some way sexually interrested to.
unless you slept with him for about 200 times and he actually got bored of the sex
OR
you are not sexy and he "manzoned" you but really thinks your "cool" and that is rare to happen.
I really have to say though.
true friendship for men is hardly ever achieved and usually takes a lifetime to establish
" you broke up with him because your feelings started fading". for a man that is somewhat telling him "fuck off your not worth a friendship".
why? cause in most cases we value friendship a step higher than a romance
@germanafro@xanga -
as a matter fo fact i woudl rather marr ymy best friend than my current girlfriend
I think that trying to understand why everyone does what they do is a great way to drive yourself insane. Iwould just take his actions for what they are: a sign that he's not really interested in maintaing a friendship with you, and go on with your life like you were doing before the confusing messages.
I mean you're not really friends, you're exes and for a lot of people it is understandable to not want your partner to talk to their exes often. So really I would not worry about it so much. Move on with your seperate lives.
@leftovers_for_lunch@xanga - either that or he was bitter about her breaking up with him, and wanted her to break up with her current bf so he could be like "Sorry I have a girlfriend"
So... you were his top pick but he had to move to option number two. Makes sense to me.
.He was trying to get back with you, but dropped out when he found out you were attached. He then found someone, and now has no need for you. It sucks, I know.