Thursday, 28 June 2012

  • The Science of Love



    Wearing matching rain jackets is my girlfriend's unscientific test for when a couple moves from being in lust to being in love. But seemingly there’s a bit of brain science behind the switch. Sexual desire activates a part of the brain called the striatum, but love and lust light up different areas, the Huffington Post reports. So how much of this love science do you buy into? 

    I was originally a psychology major, but picked up magazine journalism after one too many psychology classes bored me to tears. But the Syracuse psychology department is experiencing a bit of redemption in my eyes, as they were part of this sexy little study.

    Lust activates an area of the striatum associated with simple pleasures, like food. But to be honest, I didn't need the Journal of Sexual Medicine to tell me that there isn't much difference between how I feel about ice cream and sex.

    In contrast love activates an area of the brain that links value with pleasurable rewards like sex, researchers from Concordia University, the University of Geneva, West Virginia University and Syracuse University (Woohoo!) found. 

    Maybe it’s not what the romantics want to hear, but it sounds like you really do learn to love someone the way you were toilet trained as a kid. The more a need is rewarded successfully (sex/needing the bathroom) the brain conditions us to engage in behaviors that will replicate the feeling of reward. Cue long term relationship, no bathroom accidents, matching rain jackets, and lots of love in your heart.

    But I'm not sure how much I like science invading my love life. Do I really want to know the profound effect the striatum has on my sexual desires? And what I really want to know is, if all this sexualpsychobabble is true, why does your heart hurt when things go wrong?

    Were you aware of “learning” to love your partner? Do you believe in the science of love?

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Comments (9)

  • left_girl@xanga

    I studied psychology for a few years... And went over the "science of love" at least once. From the earliest moments of desire (pre/post friendship, however a particular relationship came to be) are guided by chemical onsets in the brain. Releasing neurotransmitters and oils and even scents... short term basis includes  the locking eyes, first touch, kiss... so on, so forth... and long term "love" is perpetuated by physical touch (releasing dopamine, norepinephrine, and other "feel good" chemicals) as well as history and growing knowledge of our other. It's the addition to neuropsychology, the cognitive and behavioral aspect of love. While psychology claims metaphysical importance, it still cannot fully explain it, and I believe it is found in deep and sincere love to another individual.


     I never had those physical moments before falling in love with my now-best-friend and lover. We grew to love each other through time spent chatting, exchanging art and music, emails, and many phone conversations. The consummation of our bodies was incredible, but physical science could not explain our love pre-body. 
  • nonurbusinessyo@xanga

    Seeing as I am a bioscience guy, I find the study of love via science highly fascinating.  If you ask me what love is in a philosophical sense, I could never pin down an object definition. It's kinda like porn, you'll know it when you see it.  But if you talk the scientific measurement of love then I can get behind that.  This can be a spike in brain activity in specific areas or increase levels of serotonin in the blood, something measureable.  Heck, I even pay attention to my own body reaction as I go through the various stages of courtship and it's really fascinating to see the biology at work as you are falling in love.
  • P0RCELA1N_D0LL@xanga

    your heart "hurts" because the stress, nervousness, etc, raise blood pressure, so the blood vessels in the heart constrict/contract, and cause pain and other miserable symptoms that sometimes might result in a heart attack. this pain isn't just caused by "love," but anything extremely stressful might have a similar "painful heartache" symptom so the thoughts in the brain trigger other body reactions linked to the heart, thus causing your heart to hurt. it's all in your brain. but the romanticized version says to "follow your heart." I'm a logical romantic
  • methodElevated@xanga

    I'd love to see more articles like this on Datingish.
  • GagaMonster

    I have a Master's in psychology, and I think your heart hurts when you lose someone because you have put so much into the relationship, you have investments in that person (emotional and maybe even physical), and the person you relied on to feel good and gain those long-term pleasurable rewards is gone and not able to provide you with the attachment you felt you had with that person.  I'm much more interested in the psychological effects than the brain chemistry, so honestly I'm not sure what your brain is specifically doing when your heart hurts.  I can only imagine that if your brain links value to pleasurable reward and that defines love, then taking away that value (the person you love) will result in a kind of withdrawal, similar to when a hardcore heroine user stops using.  Thanks for such a thought-engaging post!!!
  • Iona@healthkicker

    @methodElevated@xanga - Hi, I wrote this story, but sorry I'm replying under my healthkicker writer's name. Thank you, I really appreciate it :)
  • Iona@healthkicker

    @GagaMonster - Thanks, again, I'm replying under my healthkicker account, but I appreciate your comment, it's great to have such informed feedback. all the best. iona/lovelife
  • XxQuT3nShYxXBX@xanga

    very interesting post, totally got me wanting to research love from a scientific point of view.  
  • ValaniRose@xanga
    Party over here, party over there...

    It's cool to see there's a solid difference in the locations where lust and love fire in the brain. However, I might argue with the conclusions of the study. Aside from what an above commenter wrote, I've never seen anyone, including myself, fall in love with someone for whom they didn't feel an initial "spark". And that spark always seems to include some sexual tension, but is not the same as simple lust. In love, there is an immediate, added connection (or perceived connection if the love is one sided) of emotional fulfillment and values.


    That's how my experience has worked in any case. As a non-scientific, but universal proof in my own life, ALL of the happiest long term relationships and marriages I have seen among my friends began this way - whether they had a crush they didn't act on for twenty years or met one morning and spent the rest of the day planning their future together. The latter scenario includes a very happy couple that has been together for 35 years. It's very surprising to see, because everyone tells us love doesn't happen this way, that you have to build it up over time and whatnot. There is some maintenance involved, of course, but these couples who were in love from the very start seem happy to do it. My guess is that love is not cultivated in that particular part of the brain, but maybe it starts there to begin with. I also wonder how the researchers screened for "love" versus "lust." Love is such a subjective term, and I'm sure a few people could have accused my friends of just being in lust or infatuated with their partner in those beginning days of their relationships. Just wondering. Interesting study. I hope they do some follow up studies as well.

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  • lovelife
    • From: lovelife
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    • About Me: I love lots of things, although at the top of my list is Harper Beckham, possibly the best dressed baby ever. Aside from creeping Harper I love Stumbling, running, weight training, and eating chocolate pudding whenever possible. I'm not a relationship expert but I'm happy to throw my two cents in
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