There's always a reason for a date not to blossom into a full-blown committed relationship. Maybe one person isn't in the most secure of places in his or her life. Maybe there just wasn't enough chemistry. Maybe they want something a bit more casual.
Still, what do you do with all of that initial attraction? Is it something that can be wiped away quickly or does it need to slowly dissolve after many more attempts at the same thing?
Multiple times, I've found myself in a relationship purgatory. While the initial dates didn't lead to a heavenly relationship, I never burned any bridges with them--communication, outings, and flirtations carried on.
My first encounter with this very grey dynamic left me in tears. My second time around, however, leaves me somewhat elated and comforted. There are obvious differences between the two men I've been caught in this black hole with, but the overall structure seems the same: talk when you think of the other, see the other when you're in town or up for an adventure, leave it as simply another chapter to whatever bizarre story you're creating together.
I'm not sure I'd consider it dating, as the time between each date seems random and often too long. I wouldn't really consider it a fling because, while there may be some fooling around, the dates rarely lead to sex. It's a curious dynamic and I feel as if, this time around, I'm beginning to accept it.
Have you ever been in a similar situation with a love interest?
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Comments (2)
Yeah. Hated it because it seems characterized by feeling "meh" about someone... and having them feel "meh" about you.
Yep. I really liked the guy too... it lasted for over a year, and we would go out on dates and have an amazing time, and for most of the "relationship" most of the physical stuff was kissing at the end of the date (we didn't do anything more for ten months). However, we never established anything, and never talked about it moving forward (even though I would've loved for that). Weird state to be in...