So I recently caught my boyfriend in the act of looking at some odd pictures. I know anime females, like most cartoon females, are meant to be exaggerated in their "womanly" features, but this whole nudity thing is quite new to me. What's even more new, for lack of better wording, is that my bf is looking at them. I find it disturbing.
I honestly was naive enough to never believe that was the sort of thing people got off on. It was more of a "If I don't see it, it doesn't exist," sort of thing. I just caught him looking at it (well not just looking, if you know what I mean), and I'm put off by it. Even more by the fact that he did it while I was in the house. It wasn't at a time where I would be sleeping either. It seemed he was so turned on by what he saw that he forgot there was a chance I might walk in on him.
I did some research and I'm trying to be understanding about it, but I don't get it. I feel like it's fine for other people, but not within my own household, especially not my BF. I'm trying not to be judgmental, but it really caught me off guard. I don't see the sexuality behind it. I see some sort of sexual fetish that tries to be childish at the same time. I'm seeing it more as a problem, like psychologically; I feel like it could be a deal breaker for me. I mean, dare I say, I'd prefer he'd look at actual humans.
Do any of you look at anime in this form? Do you watch hentai? Would you be put off by your SO looking at these?
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Comments (119)
You're upset that he's looking at drawings?
Seriously?
That sort of fantasy is way less threatening then living, breathing flesh...but I guess you have your reasons.
My spin? It doesn't matter where he gets his appetite...so long as he eats at home.
So you'd rather him look at other real women, who may even be accessible to him (if you know what I mean) instead of wanking off to a cartoon? Because I'm sure if he were tugging his peter to a picture of some girl on facebook you'd totally feel better.
Jesus, women are fucking crazy.
I've seen hentai, I can definitely see the appeal. It's a lot like looking at porn, just... drawn. (I mean, I prefer erotica either way /shrug) I don't know. I don't think it's unusual, but then again, I'm huge on anime culture. If he is too, then that's a pretty standard thing. I wouldn't be worried at all, it's just like watching porn, but if it bothers you this much...
It's not just hentai, I think it's more of Western views on animation as oppose to their Asian counterparts. In America, animation is typically viewed of as something geared towards children. You have things like Bugs Bunny and Mickey Mouse, which are cartoons that are light hearted and appealing to children in their simplicity (very few western cartoons are complex in nature). In Japan, animation is extremely diverse and can be used to target audience from all different age groups. It can be serious piece of work that is made for grown ups or silly cute anime that kids watch.
As for my views on hentai itself, I think it's just another variation of porn. I don't think people who like hentai are any different than people that like traditional porn. Different strokes for different folks.
People have their own things that get them aroused or turned on. Maybe you can use it to spice up your sex lives? Role play by dressing up as one of his favorite anime characters?
I...what? They're DRAWINGS. I honestly think you'd be much more put off if you saw him getting his kicks through pictures of girls he knew on Facebook. These girls will never be real, they're a fantasy - but girls he knows in real life or on Facebook? There's every chance he could go off and sleep with one of them, but you're worried about a drawing?! Really?
Hentai > actual human porn. It's so much more versatile as a medium.
Tentacles mmm.
Have you ever watched porn? Are you against all porn or just hentai? Have you thought about what parts of it you dislike? Have you ever tried watching porn?
Anime, while animated, isn't necessarily childish. A lot of the time it's main demographic is for an older crowd. It's just a different medium.Maybe ask him to watch it with you and (question, don't demand) what part of it turns him on.
My guess is that he enjoys sex (or sexual stimulation) he enjoys anime, and it's a way to enjoy both.
lol so much hate.
Personally I’d be pretty freaked out if I caught my boyfriend watching hentai. Why? There’s too much fucked up shit in it. loli, guro, tentacles, incest, shemales, rape, etc etc. I know not all hentai end up in these genres but from years of experience on the internet, I’d say it’s a good portion.
Yes normal porn obviously has similar genres but not so much. Type rape or childporn in redtube or pornhub will get you nothing. Now try that in a hentai site. See my point?
I don’t think it’s unreasonable to be upset or think this is a deal breaker. But if I were you I wouldn’t do anything too hasty. Like others have said, it’s just another type of porn. Find out what exactly has he been watching and judge for yourself.
haha I actually like hentai though there is some pretty wierd stuff in that 'genre' of porn so I guess it would depend what he was actually looking at, but unless hes looking at it hours everyday and not having any sex with you, I'd probably just talk to him about it and see what the go is :)
My worry isn't whether or not he's jacking off to "fake" or "real" porn.
My worry is that you are in the house, perfectly available, and he chose to jack off rather than come find you and have REAL sex.
I do believe masturbation and pleasing yourself is a good thing, but that's more for alone time and when no one is around (at least in my opinion). If he is choosing to masturbate to porn over having sex with you, it's a problem. You were there. Why didn't he want sex with you?
It's hentai and while it isn't mainstream, it isn't THAT odd. Of course, I guess it depends exactly on the type of hentai. If he is looking at the tentacle-rape kind, that's kinda ugh.
BUT here is what you gotta understand. What he masturbates to is his business unless is affects your sex life with him, and he rather look at porn of any kind, real people or drawings, than have sex with you. My general attitude is it's fine, but don't show me. I once had a boyfriend send me dick chick hentai (chicks...with dicks) and say "this is what I masturbated to today". It was weird that he was sharing his porn with me. You keep that to yourself.
Not gonna lie I'm sitting here laughing my ass off. My boyfriend and I both get off to hentai and I can safely say that neither of us need to be put in the nuthouse.
Don't knock it 'till you try it.
LOL. this must be the best fucking post ever--i couldn't fucking WAIT for comcast's slow-ass service to load this page after i saw the title.
listen dude. i think it's fucking weird as hell when i hear about guys (and, i just learned in the last 90 seconds, apparently some girls...) who legitimately find animated characters attractive. but at the same time, have you seen that chick winry? holy crap, if she wasn't so fing annoying, i would probably quit my job and sit at home beating off all day too.
i am (genuinely) kind of curious to know what kind of "research" you did on this, by the way.
as long as he isnt addicted and you needs are being met who cares! I wish my husband would spank it once in a while and leave me alone for a couple days lol. It may not be your thing but he can like whatever he wants. I think you have more of an issue of not being involved or having him focus sexually on something other than you. Porn or not i dont think you want him making himself happy in that way.
I lol'ed at this. Whatever floats his boat. It's really not that weird.
First world problem.
I haven't watched it but jin kizama from the tekken video game is soooo hot. I was about to add him to that other blog about fictional characters that I'd date, but I'll mention him on this post instead. I love tekken's hair
I've said it before on a past comment but japanese pornstars sound like pikachu's voice, so I'd be disturbed that he is turned on by a high pitched pikachu from pokemon making sex noises. I know that they had that voice before the pokemon show, but I can't seem to get into porn where the voice reminds me of pikachu. the sex juices(pardon mi) in anime don't do it for me-too fake looking lol maybe if it was CGI porn, then it'd look more realistic, but that porn would likely be expensive due to expensive production. I don't watch real porn either starring other people. my guy makes porn for me. he's like my own sex genie
his juices are way hotter to look at. TMI!
laterzzz.
hahaha. look what i just found! perfect for your homeboy. http://now.msn.com/now/0618-porn-camp
I'd be put off by it too. I prefer my boyfriend watch real people. In this shit the girls look like fucking kids with adult bodies. Fucking creepy.
My boyfriend is like this too. He even has some pretty explicit backgrounds on his desktop. I'm taken aback by it myself. It doesn't matter to me whether it's drawn or real, but in my mind he's still getting off to other women (who are made to look extremely sexy and have unnatural attributes, definitely beats me in the look-wise department). I'm the jealous type though, and I know this is a major flaw. But he tries to justify himself that they aren't real women, but I just wish he could put himself in my shoes.
I can't even begin handle this, lol. What even! Get over it!