There's a
Sex and the City episode where Miranda is dating a guy who likes to do his business with the door open. At one point, he walks into the bathroom as she's brushing her teeth and pees in front of her. She finally stops dating him when she makes him coffee while he has diarrhea in her apartment - with the door open.
Communication in any relationship is the key to its success. But
how much information is too much?My mother is the queen of TMI. She once told my sister the name of the Boston hotel in which she was conceived. She also doesn't understand why she shouldn't tell us this kind of information. So I have a higher TMI tolerance than most.
That said, having a guy go to the bathroom in front of me is a dating dealbreaker. Any mention of bathroom business is gross to begin with. But a guy who does his business in front of me will quickly become into a guy who I cannot have any sexual attraction to. I don't want to picture you on the toilet when you're having sex. Call me squeamish, but gross.
But some people think that after a certain amount of time, this kind of conduct is acceptable. Certainly, there's a level of intimacy in a long-term relationship that lets you do and say things on Date 500 that you wouldn't dream of on Date 5. Still, sometimes, too much is just too much. It's healthy to keep a bit of mystery in a relationship. And for those of you who say that you've been married 15 years and have 3 kids and know everything about each other, at the very least, shut the bathroom door.
What counts as too much information - action or word-wise? Would you be OK with having a S/O use the bathroom in front of you?
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Comments (46)
No poop or fart jokes allowed? DEALBREAKER.
Yes, natural human bodily functions are soooooo gross.
I don't think I have a limit for too much information in a relationship. I also don't mind if a partner uses the bathroom with the door open or in front of me.
Everyone is different. To me, I love the toilet experience. :) I think why the hell not talk about it. What's the point if I have to watch what I say to my S.O.? Point is to love someone for all that they are and toilet business is a natural human business that is a part of us all. Why not take in the humor of it. Today I was in the toilet for a while and texted my bf that I'd be a bit cuz last nights dinner was burning my ass. So again if you find someone you can tell everything and anything to AND still want to jump their bones later, you're golden!!!
So no TMI for me when it comes to bodily funtions.Ha ha ha my friend used to sit and fart on girls that he would want to potentially date. Based on their reactions he would date or not date them.
But yea..I think only peeing done by my SO when I'm showering is acceptable. You can't see him and you may not even know he entered the bathroom! ...only when married.
My husband and I do it in front of each other all the time. We don't have a single secret from each other and we don't hide anything either. I don't have a TMI censor, I have to watch other people and figure out what is appropriate or not in pretty much any situation.
I saw that episode last night.
I've never had a really long relationship, but I definitely do not want to pee or poop in front of an SO, nor do I want them doing so in front of me.
I dont really mind peeing or burping at all. Pooping in front of each other is a whole different story though
i dont care for using the bathroom infront of my boyfriends, however if they want to do it infront of me that's fine. O_o. I like watching men pee. *shrugs*
oohh yeah baby, let the diarrhea bombs splash and aroma dance on the tip of your nostril as you embrace everything that your lover has to offer while the bathroom door is wide open
My wife and I don't care what happens in the bathroom, unless of course it was a really bad shit that reeked. In which case neither of us want to be in there, but as far as we know, they have not discovered a way to safely detach one's ass.
Me and my boyfriend haven't gone out of our way to go to the bathroom in front of each other, but for reasons that would take too long to get into, it's happened anyway over the course of our 3 year relationship. And it hasn't hurt our relationship at all, I think it really just depends on the kind of people you are, what you consider to be gross to the point of revulsion. But I grew up the oldest of five, changing dirty diapers and cleaning up puke and dealing with the weird, insane things little kids do. In comparison my boyfriend peeing at the toilet while I'm in the shower is just whatever. But I can 100% see why that would deeply bother other people, which is why I say it's subjective.
I don't understand why bodily functions are so disgusting. Yeah, okay, so it smells, but that's really the worst of it. We all do it. I mean, ideally I wouldn't, but if my S/O is brushing their teeth and I'm busting for the toilet, I'm not going to hold it in (which is bad for you, especially if you do it regularly) just because I'm "embarrassed". If you gotta go, you gotta go!
My family is very open with each other so I don't have a problem with TMI but I think seeing my boyfriend use the bathroom would embarrass me. He already belches and farts around me and it doesn't bother me at all-cept for the time he farted on me when I beat him at Call of Duty.
Things are different between me and my significant other. We have known each other for almost a decade, but have just gotten the opportunity to date last year. Very shortly after we started dating, he got extremely sick, and I took him to the hospital and stayed with him every second I wasn't at work. The diagnosis was diverticulitis - a condition caused by a flap of skin in the bowels catching food and becoming inflamed. He had it so bad that his bowel decided to block off the infection, which swelled and abscessed.
He should have died - I'm thankful every day that he didn't.At any rate, because of all of the time I spent with him in the hospital, and because of his condition, he either was constantly hooked up to a catheter, or was using a urinal, which I would go empty for him. Using of the bathroom for a month afterward for him came with the sense of "Am I going to feel okay today? Am I going to get sick again? Will I be in the hospital for another month?" Because of this, that tension that most people get when their significant other, family member, or friend uses the bathroom just never existed. I have to admit, I still very nervously ask him if he's feeling alright, if he's using the bathroom regularly, etc. I don't want him in the hospital again either.
So I say this to you, fellow Xanga readers: If you and your lover have a very strong chance of being married one day, don't let piddly problems like this get to you!You never know if one day you'll look back and wish they were around TO give you these kinds of silly problems.
I've been with my S.O for 9 years. We make a point of keeping the bath room door closed. We also make a point of not "farting" in front of each other, same for burping.
Those are our TMI lines.
I may add the same thing goes for my best friend of over 20 years and my family.
My family tends to not care about the bathroom or farting & burping. But I do not do it in front of them and I HATE when it is done in front of me.
All that said, if he was really sick, paralyzed etc, I would absolutely take care of him, I would do anything for him, but that hasn't been a need for us at this point in time.
i guess it would depend with every individual couple, but personally, peeing in front of me would be kind of gross, but probably not that much of a big deal for me. i'd probably just close the door myself. lol!
I'm not grossed out by my partner's functions. I mean if something smells really bad, it smells bad. But I'm not going to lay there having sex thinking about the fart my boyfriend let out last week. I think it's sweet when someone feels comfortable enough to do anything like that in front of me, and I welcome it! On the other hand though, I have NEVER myself been that comfortable with anyone to reciprocate.
@fantaiesiesombre@xanga - I'm so sorry for what happened with your boyfriend and I'm glad he's better, but your post brings up a great point. What if your partner is sick or gets into an accident and suddenly needs you to help him go to the bathroom, to wipe himself etc - are people going to be too "grossed out" to help him? :-/ I know it's kind of different circumstances, but the way some people are reacting to burps and farts does make me wonder.
Sometimes the guy I'm seeing will piss me off with something and I'll get him back by letting one rip. I'm not afraid to fart in front of guys. If they can belch in front of me and think it's ok then I'll fart so they can smell it. We always end up laughing about it, though. so I don't know...he's also left the phone on and told me to hold on a second while he was taking a piss over the phone. I was like WOW, ha.
@daydreams_nightmares@xanga - Thank you - I'm glad he's doing much better too! Basically all he needs to do to keep healthy is to take a serving of fiber every day and not eat anything with seeds or husks, like tomatoes, strawberries, popcorn, etc. Another thing that kept me from being grossed out with him is that he has hidradentitis suppurativa, which is a skin condition that brings tons of boils and scars along the underarms, groin area, etc. It actually keeps us from being intimate on occasion, but I've loved him ever since the day we met, and no ailment of his could keep me away from him. On the other hand, we constantly joke about our age difference, (I'm 24 and he's 31) i.e. my need to "wipe" him since he's getting old.
If you truly love the person you are with, you are fully willing to help them out, through sickness and in health.So if the day comes that I do need to help him use the bathroom again, I will do it without complaint.
I never minded when my ex peed in front of me in the bathroom. He once peed in an energy drink can in my car because we were driving through the desert. Then it spilled on him and I about died of laughing. Anyways, I never peed in front of him. Sometimes I'd shut the door and not lock it, but he'd come walking in. I don't think that's that bad. Pooping though would never fly with me. I'd be so disgusted. Yeah, it happens and you gotta do what you gotta do, but that's gross and can be smelly. So I'd rather the door just be shut during that.
i don't get the big deal about peeing in front of your SO. i don't really think bodily functions are gross/TMI. but i definitely prefer the door closed for pooping though because that way the exhaust/ventilator works better, and the rest of the house continues smelling like jasmine and copal incense instead of jasmine, copal and poop. :)
I don't consider using the bathroom in the same category as keeping a secret... you're just having good manners and being hygenic by not doing it in front of them. Completely different.