I'm 20 years old and I've been together with my boyfriend for over two years now. A lot has changed since then, 5 days a week he's gone to study and I only see him for 8 hours in the weekend. At first I was always very sad when he left, but now I don't even care anymore. I have stopped missing him and I'm not that excited if I know that I'll see him.
I do still love him but I find it very hard to be practically single all week and than I have to flip a switch in the weekend to be intimate again. It's hard for me to get used to someone touching me again.
That's the first half of the problem. The second part is about the dreams I have. They're always about other men. Sometimes it's about unknown men but the last few times it's been about a really good friend of mine. I see him every day at school and he always makes me smile. I know that I like him, but I'm not sure if he likes me in that way.
I don't know what all these feelings mean. I love my boyfriend but I don't know if I want to be with him forever. But on the other hand, I know that he adores me and I can picture us getting married someday, but I feel like I still have to experience so many things. My heart would break if we'd ever split up, but I wouldn't know if I missed him or if I missed being in a relationship. I really don't want to hurt him because I know he loves me so much.Am I emotionally cheating?Image Source