Monday, 02 April 2012
The thing that I learned in all my years of dating is that things can really go beautifully. Love is sweet and it is empowering, but like life, it can have its glitches. For some strange reason whenever a woman or man sees a woman or man cheating, no one ever looks on the inside to find out what may be the reason why they did.
Here are some of the reasons I have found why people cheat. This isn't in any order:
1. They feel like in some way, the relationship is already over.
Has anyone ever had that point in a relationship where it just doesn’t feel like love or a union anymore? At some point in the relationship, either the relationship is about you or him. It’s about something, but it's not about you and them. Whenever you lost that connection with each other, you eventually find a connection with someone else.
2. You lost the very thing that made you special.
If you want a significant other to not cheat on you, it helps to have something to bring to the table about them. Not just anything physical, but something else. The easiest part is having something special, often times the hardest part is keeping it or having it evolve in the relationship.
3. You left what's practically yours out for grabs.
Has anyone ever heard of the phrase “finders keepers losers weepers”? The same rules apply for a relationship. If you aren’t up to remind your man everyday who keeps his attention and his heart, someone might feel the need to swipe it from under you.
4. To satisfy your insecurities about being cheated on.
While a little bit of jealousy can be good for a relationship, too much of it will push a person to defy you just to spite you. Not a lot of men or women understand that being openly afraid of being cheated on is reverse psychology. The more you tell someone not to do it and having nothing to show for it, the closer and closer they will get to breaking your heart, just to show you who is the true owner of their body and soul. None of that would happen, if you only gave them some reasons as to why they shouldn’t. Substance, substance, substance.
5. Because, the truth is the girl or guy they are interested in has something you lack.
It's a fact of life: wherever there is someone good, there is always someone better. And a person that isn't in love will always search around for the bigger and better sell.
6. He/She is not that relationship person anymore or they lost their ability to love.
There’s a point in a person’s life where after so many disappointments in their relationships, all a person wants to do is something till they feel ready to love again. Sometimes, they want to be the first one to disappoint before they ever get a reason to be discouraged. Which one do you think will be easier? Breaking up something decent for free ass or some healing solitude or simply going to get it?
7. You don’t really have what your lover is looking for.
Whether you are sexually inflexible to his fantasies, physically unsurprising or just all around predictable, some people cheat to satisfy the hunger of getting something new.
8. Because there may be no passion in the way you love someone.
If it doesn’t seem like there is any fire or interest in the way you kiss, the way you touch them, the way you have sex, or even the way you look at the person, eventually they'll feel the need to look for some passion. So, where are they going to get it? I don't know, and nobody has a clue about what form it will come in. They’ll probably not get lovemaking from another person, but at least it feels like you are wanted and desired.
9. He/She simply wants it right now.
Some people wait, some people masturbate. Anything to see to it that they don't complain. Some people just pluck a person off the street to screw. They'll have to do something if they can't do you. The sad reality is that not everyone's penis or vagina waits for anyone. So, if you want to keep it yours, work it out when you can.
10. Because the guy/girl has the weakest willpower you ever known. Plain and simple!
The ugly truth is that everybody has fantasies about anyone or anything at anytime any place. It happens. The trick is to remember that if it is simply a fantasy, it should also stay a fantasy. The reality is you have a lover you can always work it out with or talk about it with. If by chance a person cheats, this could mean his willpower is lacking.
There are thousands of reasons why someone would ever want to cheat. Most of it can have to do with the state of the relationship or the things the opposite lover did. But before anything happens, somebody better talk to somebody about their issues!
Do you agree with this list? Why do people cheat?