Saturday, 31 March 2012
This is a question that has boggled me for awhile now. Excluding debates on internal versus external locus of control and what not, I'd really like to know which people think is worse after a breakup--being told that there was nothing wrong, it just wasn't meant to be, or having a person list certain traits and characteristics as faults.
On the one hand, I think the "ignorance is bliss" mentality can definitely be comforting. With a positive attitude one could think, "I gave it my all, no regrets," right? However, if said person did not have such a chipper outlook, another thought process may be occurring. Something along the lines of "I gave it my all, and I still wasn't good enough."
If a person is inclined to take the latter train of thought, he or she would probably prefer being told that something was wrong that was in his/her power to change. They could take comfort knowing that they themselves are inherently okay, and that it was just some feature that the other person did not like. On the other hand, this too could backfire into "why didn't I fix it when I had the chance?"
So which do you think is worse after a breakup? Being told that there was nothing more you could do, or that you blew it?