When I was a teenager sexuality seemed like something to me that was more absolute. You were either gay or straight, and either way, I was completely accepting of both.
As I have grown older I have realized that sexuality isn't that simple.
I read
an article a few months ago that stated that a woman's sexuality is more likely to become more fluid or flat out change as she ages. I have seen this in the media with people like
Cynthia Nixon and even Lindsay Lohan. I have even begun to see this with my female friends, in which an overwhelming amount identify as bi-sexual or at least express in interest in bi-curiosity.
I have long-stated that I also notice an attractive woman before I notice an attractive man. I have even had sexual thoughts about other women, although I have never acted on it. I still identify myself as straight. At this time I could not see myself entering a relationship with another woman because in my life I have only been emotionally attracted to men. However, I am now starting to see where the lines between homosexuality and heterosexuality blur.
Do you think sexuality is more fluid or absolute? Have you noticed yourself opening up to the idea of bi-sexuality as you get older?
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Comments (42)
Sexuality is sexuality.
Fluid is fluid.
Anything beyond that is personal opinion.
Make your own path.
Its definitely fluid. I've done research papers on the subject, and I definitely believe that sexuality is a continuous trait, not discreet. I don't know about the woman thing, but I also think that as you grow older, you accept other possibilities as you gain knowledge.
Absolutely. Though I hate it when people think that if your sexuality is fluid then it's somehow less valid. Sure some people change their sexuality for the fuck of it but those people are few and far between. Most people are just reacting to human nature and the changes we make throughout our lifetime. I don't remember a time when I wasn't basically pan-sexual but I think it's rare to be so sure of your sexuality very early in life. I was just lucky that my sexuality fits me no matter what mental, emotional or physical changes I've gone through.
I think that sexuality can definitely be fluid for some people. There are people I know who are super open minded about sexuality but strongly identify with only one orientation, so I don't think it has to be fluid. But it definitely can change depending on the person. I have always been straight, but I have also been curious about women, so I feel like it's pretty normal.
it can be .
kinsey.
Sexuality is more of a spectrum than a bivalent phenomenon. I'm not particularly open to bi-sexuality, primarily because I'm at one extreme end of that spectrum. I've always been attracted to women and I expect that trend to continue.
Fluid, and not just in the sense of which gender you're attracted to. I've opened my mind to many different things as I have gotten older.
Mine appears to be.
I can only speak from my own experience, for myself, I had dated men and been interested in men for as long as I could remember, suddenly at 18, i found myself heart broken and running to the arms of a female friend who was a lesbian. We dated for 6 months. It was fast, intense and interesting, still one of the most fascinating times of my life.
But after that experience had time to settle I realized that I am indeed heterosexual and I have no desire to go back to being with a women in any form.
Now at 25, I am comfortable and very solidified in my own sexuality.
you're right. and its stupid to put labels on people. you like who you like, period.
I'm a straight woman, but some of the men that I'm attracted to are gay, so I'm not bi but I'm attracted to both straight and gay men. I just favor men and don't find women all that sexually appealing. rock hard toned bodies*droolzzz*
I'd say it's fluid.
Fluid fo'sho.
Sexuality is what you prefer,...in some cases. In other cases,..it's a fixed Northern Star!! In still other cases,..it's what an individual can get away with at the moment of preference or whatever is available.
Definitely, at least for some people. I think in and of itself, human sexuality is indeed fluid. But, a lot of people aren't open to that idea, or haven't even considered it for themselves. I had girlfriends in high school, then for a long time as a young man I identified 100% as gay, and never really considered the alternative(s). Now in my early 30s, I have a long-term relationship with a transgender woman, and identify as bisexual. Sexuality just isn't as rigid as it once was thought to be. Also, younger generations of people are largely more open to different ideas. In fact, the generation younger than me often uses identifiers like "hetero-flexible" or "no labels, just sexual." In other words, it's all good, if you're open to it.
Idk. I don't know anymore if sexuality is who you would hook up with, or who you would love. Because I identify as heterosexual since I only fall in love with guys, but I'm curious what it'd be like to kiss a girl.
If sexuality is who you love, then I think it's a lot less fluid. You either can love a gender or you can't.
I had bf till I was 17, then I was hit on by a girl and BANG! We've been together since (in a week it will be 11 months). It has a lot to do with how people around you react, too. If society wasn't so straight, I think more people would be open to experiment. There have been cultures in the past where homosexuality was way more accepted. I totally agree that falling in love isn't the same thing as having a sexual experience. I mean every time you masturbate you are having a kind of same sex experience, right? That's how we do it, we masturbate each other. It really isn't any more weird than that. But we are also in love, even though we could do this without being in love I suppose.
one theory (sorry i forgot the name of theory) claims that people are actually all bisexual to start with. however societal norms/attitudes perhaps shape people to behaviour in a more 'desireable' way, so men supposed to be with women and vice versa would be the norm
4 me is not fluid I need a pennis to get horny about.
Sexuality may be fluid for some people but definitely not for me. I'm a female but the thought of doing it with another female repulses me. Vaginas are not sexy to me at all. To each their own, I guess.
The problem with gender and sexuality is that people see it as a black-or-white subject, but in reality very few people are 100% straight or gay. Rather than thinking of human sexuality as taking sides, we need to acknowledge that it's, in fact, a huge gray spectrum.
@loudmoaner - You misspelled "tennis".
I believe that love is blind. I also believe that in some people, sexuality may be fluid, people who are straight gaining an interest in being bi-curious as they get older, or bi-sexual and bi-curious youth that end up "picking" a gender. I know women, no matter what preference, will admit that another woman is attractive, and men, no matter whether gay or straight, will admit if another guy is good looking. That doesn't mean they are interested in a relationship. But that alone shows that we do see attractiveness in our own genders and argues that, if a person is open to this concept, that sexuality can very much be fluid. I was straight, then I became what i though was bi-sexual but was actually bi-curious, and now I believe that love is love and that is all that matters. (Allowing for the fact that the people involved in the relationship are consenting adults and both human and nothing else, of course).