Believe it or not, it sucks more than loneliness. Because even in your loneliest moments, the only one who is sitting around thinking about how your life isn't what you want it to be is you. But when someone is looking at you and spewing patronizing cliches left and right, it's not you that's telling you your life sucks, it's someone else--though of course they are only implying it, and in the nicest way possible. For me, that is infinitely more unpleasant.
Sometimes being single is fun, and sometimes it's not as fun. But when people find out you're single and say some irritatingly well-meaning version of "Aw, poor you...it will happen for you someday..." that is when it's really most annoying
. I stand there thinking, holy crap, please stop. (And sometimes, I actually say it.)
I coach high schoolers after school and one of my kids, in typical amusing teenage girl fashion, made it a point to ask me lots of nosy questions about my (then) boyfriend last Valentine's Day. I saw her yesterday and asked her how she was doing. She told me that she is all excited about this new guy she's dating, and asked me about mine. I told her that we broke up, and she immediately launched into the whole "Someday, your prince will come" speech. It's bad enough being the only single person at a wedding or party and having to hear it from all your friends...but seriously, hearing this stuff from a 16 year old girl? Good Lord, make it stop.
Like I said, sometimes being single is fun, and sometimes it's not. But please, do not feel bad for me. Don't pity me. And for heaven's sake, stop telling me that "someday, it will happen for me too." I know that it will. But in the meantime, I'm enjoying my life, and not obsessing over something (or someone) I don't have.
Are you single? Great. Are you in a relationship? Awesome. Whatever your relationship status, please just enjoy your life, and I will happily do the same--no pity necessary.How do you feel about pity?