Sunday, 01 January 2012
-
Are Interracial Relationships Wrong?
Last January I met my boyfriend/best friend. We share many similarities and our differences generally don’t tend to disrupt the regular functioning of our relationship. However, there is something that has caused a little bit of a stir when we’re in public.Last week, while walking around in the mall Christmas shopping, my boyfriend and I were separated by a few feet. We had left a store and he spotted someone he knew and walked in their direction while I walked in the opposite direction. I noticed that he wasn’t with me and I began walking towards him.
As I passed an elevator, one of the two black men that were standing next to it said, “Excuse me.” I looked at him, expecting him to ask me a question about where a store was or the restroom, instead I got “You need to be with someone like yourself. Not that white boy.” I looked at my boyfriend who had stopped his conversation and stared at us.
At that moment, I expected him to say something, do something, for someone else to break the awkward silence that had swept over the group, for someone to eliminate the awkward situation that had just occurred.I walked closer to my boyfriend and said, “Did you hear that?” with a smile on my face. I wasn’t sure if I smiled because I was hoping it would elevate some of the awkwardness of the situation or if I was embarrassed because the guy began complimenting me in front of my boyfriend and his friend’s dad.
My boyfriend looked confused and I knew immediately that he missed the whole ordeal. We walked away and my boyfriend grabbed me and gave me a kiss in front of the two guys. The guys said nothing.Over the past few days, the situation has been discussed multiple times. Sometimes in a joking manner, other times not so much. If the situation was different, I’m not sure how I would have reacted.
Are interracial relationships wrong in your opinion? What angers people so much when it comes to seeing an interracial couple? How would you have reacted? Would an encounter like this change the way you view your relationship?
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: meaganbme93@xanga
- About Me: I'm the eighteen year old daughter of four amazing parents (a mom, a stepdad, a dad, and a stepmom) and the oldest sister to six (yes, six) amazing siblings. I'm taken by the most amazing guy I've ever met. I know that sounds "overused" but it's definitely true. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend. There's a good chance he'll be the man I spend the rest of my life with. I'm one of those girls who goes out of her way in school and works really hard at everything which is why I've earned enough college credits to enter into college as a sophomore at Virginia Commonwealth University in Fall 2011. I'm majoring in Chemistry in order to become a pharmacist.
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 8 Views: 0 32689 Comments: 0 423 View all posts by meaganbme93@xanga
Comments (138)
Racism is alive and well. That's the only reason it bothers people. They have lots of lame excuses but at the root of everyone is plain ugly bald faced racism
It's beyond sad this question has to be asked. No, of course they aren't wrong.
Welcome to 2012, the answer to your question is no!
As much as we all think we are living in modern times; that bit of racism does exist, especially within families. It would be all lovely if you introduced an interracial counterpart to friends, but I do believe introducing to family is different. People do stare, people do judge, and it is spoken about. (elderly family members) Sad, but true.
Oh shoot I didn't answer your question. If you love someone, then forget the rest. Heck, I'm with someone twice my age. Talk about not caring what people have to say!! Good luck:)
My best friend once made a comment about a white girl and an Hispanic boy saying something like "I hate when white bitches take our men." To me, this kind of thinking is really dumb. Find someone you're happy with and stop worrying about other people.
And I doubt if I was dating someone of a different race I would think differently if someone made a stupid ass comment like that. haters gonna hate.
I have a question for black people: do a significant number of black people think that black men are more manly than white men?
Come on now. Isn't this beating a dead horse? We love who we love. Nuff said.
You are your own person so you have to right to choose who you want to be with. They don't own you and shouldn't dictate your life.
whether you're black white brown or purple your brain functions the same way every one elses does. I love my interracial relationship. If someone ever said this to me i'd be so pissed!
Wow. That's incredibly rude that someone would actually SAY something about it to you. We're they older men, because I've noticed that older people tend to disagree with interracial dating than younger people. It's absolutely not wrong! I know plenty of people, including myself who are relationships like that. Haters gonna hate.
Elevate or alleviate?
What was the movie with Julia Stiles where she dated a black man? "White people are always taking the best we have." That's not how I feel, but it's a sort of quote I remembered from the movie. Maybe that is why those guys were pissed.
I tend to date outside of my race pretty regularly and I've never gotten slack from anyone around me. I do know that racism FLOURISHES in Asian communities. Holy hell, is it bad! One of my friends was the youngest girl in her family. She married a white guy. Her parents nearly disowned her. My friend told me she totally understood! Her friends agreed! HOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
@LightBlue21@xanga - My impression is white people, are generally seen to Blacks and Hispanics as lame, boring, and less. I grew up in Houston, in a high school of about 40% Black and 40% Hispanic, being white there I was actually a minority. I didnt care much though, I liked having friends of different races (and I still do). Sometimes I didnt like being called "Cracker" though.. but it was part of the environment I grew up in, so I was use to it. I also noticed a tendency of Black men to refer to smart black men as acting "too white" for them. The irony of this statement they made to you is that, in my observations, it is ok for black men to date white women but not ok for black women to date white men. Doesnt that seem hypocritical?
@SasGal@xanga - the movie is "Save the Last Dance".. I really liked that movie!
@Doubledb@xanga - That's right! I was thinking "Save the Dance" because "Save the Last Dance" is a Michael Buble song
what the hell. No, but there was something wrong with the bigot who made this comment.
I grew up in a Hispanic community and all the Hispanic moms would press their daughters into marrying white men because of several different reasons - to gain U.S. citizenship, Hispanic men were viewed as disrespectful, macho, drunk, and abusive, although white men were seen as lazy. It was all about getting U.S. citizenship. Even my mother told me to marry someone who was white despite the fact that we were U.S. citizens, because of the stereotypes of Hispanic men.
Long story short, I married a white boy and my Hispanic family was angry with me for not marrying someone who could speak their language. They are such hypocrites!
In any case, be with who you love. Screw everyone else.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with interracial dating/couples. People are some times put off by things that are out of their element, such as one's decision to love another person of a different race/ethnicity/culture/etc. I love interracial couple because they generally seem happier than the rest of us, or at least this is something I have noticed. I feel sorry for you because now you're constantly put into an awkward position where you have to question whether people will look at you weird or say something because of your significant other. It all falls back to racism and ignorance. I bet you guys are a beautiful people couple. The more you ignore ignorance, the happier your life will be. this is coming from someone who also had to question whether being in an interracial relationship was worth th criticism.
I am in quite the taboo relationship. I am 18, while my boyfriend is 16.We've been together over 7 months. The age difference isn't huge, but it freaks alot of people out. What people don't know, is that he's been through alot of things people in their 20s havent been through, and is more responsible and mature than people my age. Not to mention, we never get into the petty fights that other teenagers do. Along with the age thing, I am mixed, and he is white. Like. Porcelain ghost white. One of those emo boys. So do we get shit? Yeah all the time. Once he was about to high five his friend and she hid her hands and said "No, I don't want to touch black pussy" Really? Really now?
All in all, if it makes you happy, go for it. Anyone who's against happiness is going to hell anyway(: Interacial relationships are completely fine, it's not about the skin, its about the soul living inside it. I think people get angered by it because in their minds they picture white blonde blue eyed people with other white people, and black people with black people, etc. They have expectations of what they want the world to look like, and when it doesnt match up, they don't know how to handle it.
So sad. People can be so shallow.
You have no idea how much this post infuriated me.
Are interracial relationships wrong in your opinion?
Are you fucking /serious/? This isn't the fucking stone-age. NO, THEY'RE NOT WRONG. I can't believe this question was even asked!!
What angers people so much when it comes to seeing an interracial couple?
Racism. It's fucking stupid how people still hold such racism within their hearts. They fear what they don't understand/like, and therefore become fucking douchebags.
How would you have reacted?
Seeing as how even now my temper is flaring, I would have told those guys off, told them to mind their own business; my life isn't hurting them, and for them to keep their ugly racist/discriminatory opinions to themselves!
Would an encounter like this change the way you view your relationship?
NO, and it should NEVER for anyone. Just because a few people are douches doesn't mean you have to bend down and please them.
Ok, I'm done here. Sorry for all the cussing and whatnot. *shakes it off*
My boyfriend is black and I'm white. This has caused a bit of a stir with a few of my family members (who happen to be from the south), but they seem to be the only ones who care. Personally I can't see how love is wrong just because skin tone is different. If we are talking about genetic variance there is more within race than between. But alas race is a social concept (literally the main distinction is because some decided that is how we should divide people), so we will be stuck with people who hold on to these outdated views. I actually get hit on a lot by people outside my own race, maybe it's just my location. Your happiness is the main focus though, if you are happy and he treats you well it shouldn't matter what his skin color is.
Kudos. You handled it well. I probably would have started scrapping if I were you.
Some people just don't know when to shut the f*** up.
Jealousy. That's all it is. Thank God for interracial dating! Otherwise I wouldn't exist haha. The heart wants what it wants. The more they hate the brighter we shine anyways.