Saturday, 31 December 2011
One week ago I went out on a date with a guy whom I knew very… let us say "lightly" or as you wish: "barely." We spoke on the phone, we wrote on the Internet and I thought to myself, "Hell, why not? He is pretty nice!" The date itself was pretty pleasant, but what came afterwards made me feel somewhat unsettled, uneasy, and bothered. So, let me get to the point: What happened? As you can probably deduce from the title of my post: His sex talk!
Now, I have encountered this many times before, I either ignored it or just accepted it, but this was one time too far, one time too many!
He went on telling me about his favorite sex position (after I refused to tell him mine. Uhmm, hello? We just met?) and how he would love to get it going with me. Seems like I am no longer so accepting of the fact that what men really want to do is just have sex with me.
Seems like all my graduate, postgraduate and doctorate education is not getting me anywhere in the dating department. My only value to those men is my body! (Okay, fine, some of them said that I have class and that I am a great person to converse with, but it's not helping me!)
So I decided to get some insight from our slightly older generations, those who were born in the 30's, the 60's. I just asked: "Did someone ever tell you directly how they would like to… have you?" and after a moment of silence and pure surprise I heard "No, why would anyone say that in the first place?" I also shared my recent encounter and the entire situation was summed up with one word: "Nasty."
It does not matter if the guy is in his 20's or his 30's, he will still say those things to me.
Alright, I do not have a problem when a boyfriend does it. Hell, I will use the dirty talk as well! But after one or two meetings? Seriously?
Am I old-fashioned here or are men really so demoralized and disrespectful that they have no problem showing women that all they are in their eyes are sex toys? What caused all of this in the first place? The commercialization of sex? The porn industry?
P.S. I am pretty much sure that there are many decent, respectful guys out there -I would love to hear from you!