Friday, 25 November 2011
I certainly do believe that especially if nothing can be worked or if it is going in cycles or something changes in their behavior. I think at a certain part, you have to let go-no matter how difficult and painful it will be. You can't hold on to dead weight and you can't keep waiting for their feelings to change.
You can't keep waiting for that someone to love you again, feelings aren't that simple and they can't be turned on and off like that.
I see this happening with one of my closet friends and despite my advice, she's going to hold on a bit longer but I told her and I repeat it here, that she can't wait forever for him and if nothing happens, she should leave because how it stands, it really feels like he's stringing her along especially if he's not willing to change (note there is a big long story around him. He hasn't exactly been good at all and gave clear signs to her that he wanted to break up with her, but she's unwilling to accept it but it's hitting a breaking point and a new development that settled over them is breaking them further) there is nothing she can do but go and live her life.
She's already tried to rectify her own mistakes but he's refusing to really meet her in the middle and sometimes that happens. They've been together for four years and both of them made mistakes during that process.
I'm not surprised how he would feel either. Four years is certainly a long time as I'm only going to hit my second year with my bf next year in March. A lot can happen in just a few months and four years is a very big passing number.
I always tell her too, know when it is worth to stay or leave and I've certainly gone through a lot of that in my own relationship with my bf. It's not been easy and I've made mistakes but I see them now and know that my relationship doesn't have to end up like my friends'. It's a good wake up call really.
Either way, I'm always by her side, supporting and giving advice as best as I can.
I'll only wish for her happiness no matter what.
So tell me in your own personal stories when you knew it was time to let go or fight for the one you love. How did it work out in the end for you? And how much did it let you grow as a person?