Thursday, 10 November 2011
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Romance Comes in a Variety of Ways
A wise friend of mine told me just recently that romance doesn't have to come in a grand gesture, but can be found in the smallest everyday actions. After she said this to me, she simply followed it with a story about herself, her ex-husband, and current fiance.
When she was married, her ex-husband used to pay all of the bills and basically handle all of the financial situations in their marriage. She never once had to fuss with going here and there to pay the bills. He would merely handle all of it while she would, in return, cook dinner and clean around the house. He was never particularly romantic with her in the usual ways of surprises, flowers and chocolates, or gifts. He was romantic more in a way of being a man and taking care of financial business, bringing home the bacon, etc. To him, he believed that was his way of being romantic for her.
After a couple years, my friend grew tired of it. She wanted more. She desired to swept off her feet with sweet words and out-of-the-blue surprises. I honestly don't think that is too much to ask for, considering all relationships crave romance now and then. She asked him about if he could be romantic for her. And as everyone knows, it lasted for about a week before everything fell back into its normal pattern.
Obviously, their marriage didn't last due to more reasons than can be counted, but this issue was partly accountable for this. They just had different views of romance.
As of now, she is engaged to a man that does all of the things she wants. He doesn't exactly make a lot of money like her ex-husband, but he does sweet things for her when he can. He will bring her lunch at work or leave her small notes of encouragement on the mirror in the bathroom. They aren't HUGE gestures, but sometimes it is the little things that go a long way.
After hearing her situation, I looked at my own relationship. My boyfriend isn't the romantic type at all and I'm not romantic in the normal sense. I find romance in our inside jokes, when he will take me out for dinner, the way we quote lines from Spongebob and Adventure Time, and when he will sing "What A Wonder World" in my ear while we cuddle. Those are our sweet moments and I wouldn't trade them for anything.
How do you view romance? Does it come in a bouquet of roses? Or maybe something else?
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About the Author
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- From: vividepiphany@xanga
- About Me: I enjoy saying what I want, how I feel, my likes, and dislikes. Sometimes it may offend people, make them laugh, or inspire. Either way I don't care. My opinion is mine and no one will take that from me. But on a lighter note, I do like to meet new people. I want to hear new opinions and see through different perspectives, so feel free to introduce yourself and leave a comment. ♥
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Comments (11)
The romance in my relationship comes from random passionate kisses and tickle fights in bed. Him rubbing my belly and talking to our son. Him starting my bath water now that I'm sore and ready to explode (get this kid OUTTA ME!).
It comes from him working every day to support his family and never complaining.
The romance in my relationship comes from many different places. :)
My fiance' isn't exactly the most romantic person either, but he still does a lot of little things that make me smile more than anything else.
He'll always park next to me when he comes home(I know this one may sound a little silly to others, but I can't really explain it), if I'm upset about something he'll make the bed and put a coupon on it that says "This coupon is good for a lifetime of love and it never expires' for me to find when I get home, He'll hold out his hand when we're walking just a short little distance,and he'll fix my hair.
As long as they do something, no matter how weird it may seem to someone else, that makes you smile every day, that's a man worth keeping.
:]
Last night, my current... interest I guess, took me off roading at night time. it was unusual and adorable to me. held my hand and everything during and listened to pink floyd. thats romance there lol. romance is anything that simply takes your breathe away or make you smile endlessly. lol. =) cheese.
I find it romantic when a man does something that shows he recognizes and appreciates that I am a woman. That can take a very wide variety of forms. Romance is whenever he lets me know how glad he is I am not one of the guys.
i'm all about the small things. instead of roses, my ex used to send me small care packages for me. one time i went to visit him and about 2 days before i got there, he sent me a package and didn't tell me so when i got back home, this package was waiting for me. it was so cute, it was to help me to not be so sad bc we were going to be apart again. one of my ex would surprise me with a cup of coffee and ice cream. i loved it. i like all the flowers and big gestures but something small means so much more to me.
Even the smallest romantic gesture shows how much a person cares and loves you. Just the other day, my s/o sent me a little message saying how blessed he is that I'm in his life. Simple things like that touched my heart more than a bunch of flowers ever could.
I got her a nice little pill box from Etsy and filled it with Xanax. She loved it.
In my experience, some women get preoccupied with the forest and forget to look at the trees.
Real romance should destroy worlds and take one everywhere; to the heart of the one you love and back to yourself and back once more to nothing and then once again to all the beauty and pain that is life itself.
Real romance is battling with each other against your own egos. The death of "you" and the entrance into the ever-renewed inextinguishable warmth, bliss, and pain of letting go to find one another again and again.
To live is to love, to love is to die, to die is to truly live.While I'm aware of potential critiques that may diminish such ideas as melodrama, this is the truth and it always will be.
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Romance all depends on the person, you just gotta find someone who will romance you right and someone who is romances by what you do for them :)
My boyfriend does sweet little gestures for me all the time and I try to do the same for him. I think its the sweet little things that make someone smile that count.