Monday, 17 October 2011
-
Let Me Give Your Heart a Break
I've seen too many broken hearts on here. Some mourn over the loss of a first love and just can't imagine that person being with someone else, while others wonder what they did to deserve a cheating SO. Some wonder what it's like to fall in love, others warn never to fall in love. Some worry how their LDR is ever going to survive, others worry about the age difference in their relationship.
If I could, I would bestow a pixie dust upon everyone who's ever been crushed, who's ever been hurt, so that they could be healed and never hurt again. But I'm no Fairy Godmother.
You're afraid of rejection. You're afraid of ending up alone. You're afraid of good-byes. You're afraid of getting attached. You're worried you're not good enough for your SO. You're afraid of distance. You're afraid of change. You're afraid of love. Don't even front.
Stop picking out at yourself in the mirror. Stop waiting for him to call. Stop waiting for three days to go by before calling. Stop worrying about what other people will think when they see you two together. Give them something to talk about. Stop dwelling on him leaving. Stop replaying in your head that she told you you're worthless and will never amount to anything because you never put in any effort. Stop wondering why she slept with him.
Stop beating yourself up over catching him flirting with another girl. Stop taking him back every time he shows up crying, begging on his knees that he made a mistake and needs you. Stop believing her when she keeps saying she's just too busy. Stop texting someone who never responds. Stop checking his Facebook status, pictures, blog posts, comments every 5 minutes for updates and him leaving comments on other girls' photos but not yours. Stop trolling through her Facebook friends' list and evaluating the hotness factor of every male on that list. Stop running away from yourself. Aren't you tired?
You don't want to hear that "it'll be okay" because that's BS. You want to eat a bucket of ice cream and Reese's pieces and curl up in bed to Pretty Woman. You want to go to the bar and find a way to forget. You want to listen to angry music. Blast it for the full effect. You want to put a dent in the wall.
I don't know who you are. Maybe we've met. Maybe we haven't. Makes no difference. Stop making life's happiness all about that one other person. When it's right, you'll fit together like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. (Get any dirty thoughts out of the sand right now.) Those other pieces that looked like they could fit, but were just the wrong size, yeah, those pieces were helping you form the outline so that you could find the piece that eventually fit.
It's not about seeing why the person didn't love you back. It's about seeing that they weren't compatible with you and that has nothing to do with your worth. If your happiness depends on that other person, think about how much pressure you are putting on them. And on top of that, you're supposed to have the same pressure. And even if that other piece never comes, be your own man. Make friends with the other pieces like you and be comfortable laying inside the box. The world is waiting to discover you.
I don't know who you are, but I don't want to break your heart. I don't know what life's about, but it's not about finding your soul mate. Lessen the pressure. You are who you are, so just be. Love your heart. Give it a rest. Each day you spend pining after the one that got away like Miss Havisham is one day less you have to give your heart a break.
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: wyrdkismet@xanga
- Name: YuMin Ye
- About Me: i am indecisive. i am confused most of the time and easily amused. i love music. i'm not sure i can live without it. if i could, i would play a song every second of every day. there's a song out there for every mood. i love the Bible, though i don't always get everything in there. i like to randomly dance at times and sometimes i scare people when i express my feelings. my feelings go either way---i can have so many complicated emotions at once or i can be as simple as a white sheet of paper. i could fill out this section forever, but i'm not.
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 2 Views: 0 6699 Comments: 0 99 View all posts by wyrdkismet@xanga
Comments (52)
I really needed this today. This is beautiful, and completely true. =) Thanks for this post.
I'm exhausted. I wish I could give my heart a break, but it's impossible and so much easier said than done. I feel sick when I think about things, and when I try to forget them, I can't, no matter what I do. I could end my relationship, but these thoughts would still be with me. I wish there was something like in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind that could just erase my memory, that would seriously be awesome. Some people say they wouldn't want any memory erased because those memories make up who they are today, but for me, this memory made me someone I don't want to be.
hmm sounds a lot like me
I somehow.... find myself crying reading this. didnt help I was listening to "god damn your beautfiul" by chester See....
Thank you for posting this... I really needed to hear it.
Going through a pretty rough break-up right now and I need to be reminded of everything that you said...
Well Said. The Answer To My Entries :)
AS PSYCHO EX-GF? NO WAY I'VE NEVER HEARD OF THOSE
@pointe_x_x_shoes@xanga - awww, thank you! :D made me smile. love your profile pic too! beautiful ballet pointe shoes, hehe.
@HollowTendencies@xanga - oh ik it's hard. def. hard! easier said than done. and i haven't seen that movie but i have heard a lot about it. hope things get better!
@discover_hienie@xanga - glad you could relate!
@tomuch2askfor@xanga - awww, i didn't mean to bring tears. hope you're doing ok now! *hugs*
@silver_raindropz@xanga - yw and i def. know what you mean by tough break-up. hope this helped ease the pain a little.
@TsuiTsui__123456@xanga - thank you. :)
@Anonymous - um..ok...you don't make sense as this entry was not about that at all, haha.
This was beautiful. I love your way with words.
@vividepiphany@xanga - thankie :D
love. this. post.
@TheFashionableEconomist@xanga - awww, thank you, hehe.
Wow. Your timing is amazing. I am going through an awful breakup. It's been almost twenty days and all I've heard from anybody is 'quit crying, it'll pass'. I still love her, she isn't in love with me anymore. The past couple weeks have been hell. I lost weight and sleep while I meticulously went over every detail of our relationship to find what I did wrong. The answer is nothing, I guess. I needed to hear this. Thank you.
@scruffyalleycat@xanga - i am so glad to hear that this has helped! it brightens my day and ik it's easier said than done, but i have faith that you will get there and feel good again. =)
i've noticed that a lot around here too but for some people this is a place to pour their heart out and tell others their stories bc no one really knows them too well. but yes, don't keep punishing yourselves...love starts with yourself first.
@superGchik@xanga - right on!
I do appreciate the fact that you seem to despise all the bs that can come with relationships. But.. Love is the only thing that matters. Period. Done. End of story.
Obviously you should love yourself, but I have to say that focusing on that only is.. well.... just plain selfish. Giving yourself up wholly to the one/those you love is the ultimate act of selflessness and virtue.
Damn. Preach. This was good stuff, and I started out pretty skeptical about it being just another anti-love anthem.
this is beautifully written and well said. i agree. life is too short to waste so much being being unhappy and thinking of what if and could've beens.
Thank you for writing this. I've finally come to a similar conclusion and it's refreshing to read something insightful on here (it's been awhile). I agree that we need to be kinder to ourselves and lessen the pressure of finding that soulmate. Because, as you said, life is not about that.
i really needed this....thank you.
I really needed this. Thank you
:)