Wednesday, 21 September 2011
Questions are written all over my face as to why I am dating the person I am dating. Maybe it's because I really like him, or maybe it's because I wonder if he’s real, or maybe it's because I think his personality lies about who he really is. Whatever it is, it doesn’t sit well with me, and I could ask all the questions I want in the world but I don’t seem to be satisfied with the answers I get.
Sometimes he reminds me of my ex. Not extremely but just rare bits of him. Especially with the question he asks me. They are not exactly how my ex would ask them, but it's somewhere along those lines. Like if he doesn’t know any of my friends, especially the males, he seems to ask more questions about them than he does when it comes to my female friends. Like he would ask me, “How long have you known him?” “How did you feel when you saw him again?” or he’ll either say “You’ve never told me about him before. How come you never told me?” and it leaves our conversations silent and just awkward. And when I ask him why, he just says the usual “I’m just asking…”
He usually calls me at 9:05pm every single night and we talk for two to three hours at a time. But one time I remember, in fact not even once, but twice he got upset because I didn’t pick up my phone right away. One time my mother and I were babysitting my little niece while my sister went out, and he decided to call me.
I didn’t pick up my phone right away because I was dealing with a hollering two-year-old at the time, I got back to him an hour or two later telling him I was just babysitting my little niece and couldn’t come to the phone right away. Right then and there, there was a long pause on the other end of the phone and he nearly yelled (well he has a very deep voice so it always sounds like he’s yelling) “Aren’t there other people in the house?” “You usually talk to me while you babysit, why couldn’t you talk to me then?”
You should have seen my face. I was like WTF who the hell do you think you’re talking to? So I let him have it and he quickly apologized because he didn’t mean for it to sound the way it did.
Yeah. I forgave him, and he did it a second time. I was busy that week because there were tests, finals, and projects that had to be done within the same week. Of course he understood and gave me my space. He called me at the usual time and I ignored his call because I was helping out around the house.
When I called him back a couple of minutes later, he answered the phone and said “Oh, you were working on your project?” when I replied no, there was this long awkward pause and he repeated again, “You’re not working on your project?” and I replied no. Again, there was a long awkward pause and I quickly said, “Oh, so you’re trying to see what I was doing between the time you called me until I finally called you back?” and he quickly said, “No! Not at all. That project is very important and I assumed that you were working on it. No need to get all defensive, sheesh!”
Can I help that I got defensive? He’s asking me questions like he wants to know every damn thing that I do.
Then it gets worse, and Facebook is always the enemy of everything because it seems to play a role in my dating/relationship life. Every status I post, and I mean every single status I post that has something to do with love, crushing on someone, or moving on and finding greater things in life ALWAYS ends up with him thinking it was about him. SERIOUSLY, EVERYTHING I POST HE THINKS IS ABOUT HIM.
It's annoying especially when he calls me and says, “I was looking at your Facebook and I saw your status and I loved it. I know it's about me.” I’m like “I wasn’t even thinking of your ass when I posted it!” and he gets mad or upset and starts acting immature about it.
Then it gets worse when I post love songs up. I’m a big fan of slow love songs across different genres, and have been a fan since I could remember way before I even met him. But it seems that every time I post a love song up he thinks it's about him and gets mad when I tell him it's not.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m in *like,* not in love with him. We talk about everything other people wouldn’t, and do the things I have never done before. He opened my eyes to a whole new world, and I thank him for that all the time. We always make sure we are on the right page, the feelings are the same, and we take the same steps at the same exact time that way there wouldn’t be any problems before and after we take the next time. I talked to him about all of this before, but sometimes I just don’t know, and I always need a second opinion from someone different.
My sisters and aunts tell me he’s just being a man because every man does something we sort of hate or that reminds us of someone else we don’t want to be reminded of. It doesn’t mean that they are exactly like the person, but it’s a “guy” thing.
Does anyone have any similar experiences or any advice to offer me? Thanks.