Friday, 02 September 2011

• The Burp That Broke the Camel's Back

  

  I went on 2…yes 2 dates with the “Doug.” I emphasize 2 because honestly, I probably should not have gone past the first date. Date #1 was OK. No fireworks or anything like that, but I would soon learn it was spectacular compared to what would happen on the second date.  Physically, he may not have been my usual cup of tea but he was easy to talk to. We did talk about a lot of stuff on the date and I did find out a few things that I didn't particularly like.

  So all around, I was a little shaky as to whether or not I wanted to see him again, but boy, do I wish I had gone with my gut feeling and kindly said so. Seeing as he was persistent, the conversation had been pretty good, and also, I think I was going through a “I’m trying not to be shallow” phase, what I did instead was agree to a 2nd date.

  I was banking on his personality continuing to be his winning feature, however, I quickly found out it left a lot to be desired as well.  A few hours before the advent of what would be a 2nd “date” if you can even call it that, he sends a text saying: “Let’s hang out…we can do whatever you want to do, but keep in mind I’m broke.”

  Really? What the hell? So now not only had he contacted me last minute, but he also dumped the responsibility of planning something on extremely short notice AND I also have to do so with his nonexistent money?! Yes--I sure can pick ‘em!

  Well, when we finally met up later that day, all sorts of dating faux pas took place—He showed up looking like he got dressed in 3 minutes complete with a raggedy oversized coat that was reminiscent of that of the killer in "I Know What You Did Last Summer."  He didn’t so much as offer to pay for my $3 dollar coffee (I know..I ask for a lot!), he was texting during the course of the date more than was appropriate and I also think at some point, he picked up a call and told his buddies they could stop by where we were if they wanted. If 3 is a crowd, what is 5?!

  Even through all this, I was doing my best at trying to keep an open mind. I had every intention of going through with the entire date and seeing if things got better. At some point, we decided to go for a walk because after making a few suggestions of what we could do and him systematically turning all those down because of his lack of funds, I seriously figured a walk was all he could afford!

  So anyway, as we were walking, he lets out one of the loudest, most intrusive belches I’ve ever heard. For a moment, I thought a lion was roaring! My startledness at this sudden outburst was soon replaced by my being appalled. Was him burping the thing that disturbed me? No..of course not..burping is a normal bodily function. What got me was the fact that after such a particularly ferocious burp, he didn’t have the courtesy to say excuse me and that instead, he started laughing as if he had heard the world’s funniest joke! Between the roarlike burp and the hyena laugh--you would've thought we were in the the jungle! 

  I had put up with a lot on this date. I could overlook that he was no supermodel or that he didn’t have the best dating etiquette. Hell, I could even turn a blind eye to the fact he had invited his friends to hang out with us (I’m pretty sure he just wanted to prove to them that he even had a date!) but on top of all those things, he also seemed to lack common manners as well?! Now...that was just too much and this is where I had to draw a line. Suffice to say, the date didn’t last too long after that incident.

  If you’ve ever been on an all around bad date, what was the final thing your date said and/or did that really "broke the camel’s back?" 

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