Wednesday, 24 August 2011
"I can't be with a woman that has been with a black man."
I stared at him, dumbfounded. What difference does it make if I've dated a black man, or not? Better yet, what is my dating history to you? He's a good friend of mine, who has feelings for me, but I am not ready for a relationship, and I told him as much.
However, with the above condition, I'm not sure I ever will be ready for a relationship with this man.
It's not about the condition itself; it's the principle that really grinds my gears. How can you say such a thing to me? If I'm so cool, and if you want to be with me, shouldn't a prospective mate accept me for who I am, as I am? Dating history and all?
I'm not saying that from date one, he should know all about my history. As a matter of fact, there are probably a lot of things a man DOESN'T need to know about my history.
I moved to this small town from the bustling city of Joliet, IL. It's near Chicago, and it is where Statesville prison is located. [Remember the original Blues Brothers film? Statesville is the prison he picked up his brother from] Anyways, where I come from, inter-racial dating is actually pretty common. It isn't that big of a deal.
Apparently, it's a huge deal if you want to date this guy. A self-proclaimed redneck, he likes to hunt, and fish, and claims he isn't racist/prejudiced. I don't understand why he would say such a thing to me, and I definitely do not see why it matters.
In my personal opinion, who you are currently dating, or who you have dated in the past is no one else's business but your own. I think that he is being incredibly inconsiderate, and that such conditions should NEVER exist as terms of ANY relationship.
Now, I know that some people are uncomfortable dating outside of their race, or prefer not to date outside of their race, for their own personal reasons. More power to you!
But it really isn't fair to shove your opinions/beliefs onto someone else who thinks differently than you.
It doesn't matter where I've been; all that matters is that I'm here now, with you. My dating history shouldn't be held against me, especially by someone I JUST met. That really isn't fair, and I don't agree with this at all. I think that if two people are in love, and treat each other well, they have the right to be together. Period.
What do you think? Is this condition fair? How do you feel about inter-racial dating?