Sunday, 21 August 2011
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For Jorge, Nice Guys Do Finish Last
In my umbrella of friends at school, there is a guy named Jorge. Jorge has never had a girlfriend, but has a million straight female friends. He is often asked if he is gay: he doesn't have many straight male friends and has a lot of gay friends. In actuality, Jorge is just a really nice guy. In his case, it seems to constantly bite him in the ass.He is open, accepting, respectful, intelligent, outgoing, hilariously spontaneous, and kind. When he meets women, they instantly want to befriend him, yet they don't ever seem interested in dating him. His gay male friends say they'd date him if he wasn't straight. He briefly had a crush on my gay female roommate who says she'd date him if she wasn't gay.
I want to help Jorge, but I don't know how. He's a better person than I am. I probably wouldn't even be able to help him if I tried, simply because he doesn't need to change who he is.
Why can't Jorge find someone? Is this a classic case of him being the guy who's "too nice?" Do nice guys really finish last?
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- From: TheDailyDane
- About Me: I'm Dane and I'm 21. Follow me on Twitter @danefeldman. I am a huge supporter of long-term relationships. What's the fun in knowing something will end in a week? Stick around for some long-term bloggin'.
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Comments (15)
A lot of times "nice" guys are not forward or assertive enough. They automatically put themselves in the friend zone because they act like a friend. Makes sense, right? They don't act like someone who wants make out or become intimate with the girl. Not that a guy should act like a tool but without that kind of chemistry, it probably won't happen.
He probably exhibits wussy behavior and acts like he's somehow afraid to insult a woman he's with. Â
@Chibi_Son_Gokou@xanga - haha classic!
Well, is he attractive?
I don't really know why, but when I meet a guy who's SUPER friendly and warm, I just want him to be like my teddy bear and best friend. Nothing more. Actually, it will sicken me to imagine that he has sexual desires of his own.
I'll admit, my boyfriend is definitely a nice guy, but he's not one of those people who sticks out, being in the top 99.9th percentile for niceness. Those kind of guys I LOVE, just not in a sexual way. Ever.
He's the guy that women are going to look for when they're 40 and have burned through a bunch of shit burgers... And yet they're not gonna be able to get him cuz they themselves are shit burgers and this nice dude will recognize that.
:)
maybe he does not have much sex appeal so it is a neutral attraction where there is no sexual tension so some women see him as a safe male friend to have who they do not want to sleep with or have anything more with besides being a good friend
Wait five to ten years. He will be overwhelmed by choice.
I'd totally date him.
@Footballblogs@xanga - who would seriously want left overs or be the last choice?
@wenguang@xanga - Never said it was the best way!
You think religion or culture is in the way?
Lol, I think it's kinda hard to ask why Jorge isn't getting any girls from a guy. I think if a girl was to reblog this with her p.o.v. of Jorge with the same question (assuming she doesn't like him). I think female viewers would get the gist a bit easier.
I have some female friends of mine that are wonderful and pretty, but isn't sought after... Which makes me question too. BUT POINT IS.
Maybe it definitely is an assertive factor, in the sense he needs to be more assertive in hinting at his intentions, ie if he likes a certain girl, he's gotta do some stuff that is blatantly special to her. Above being nice to all his female friends.
I guess it's absolutely a "turn on" for a girl to feel exclusive. If what you say is correct about him, and he's decently goodlooking. That's all it takes.
Goodluck!
Oh, and if he acts gay, then it's more of an immediate subconscious reflex for a girl to immediately put him in the friends list.
depends on the type of gal hez lookin for- mayb he has some unrealisitic expectations abt gals