Monday, 15 August 2011
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Lucid, Not Loose
I always find my drinking nights to be a slippery slope. Not only do I drink a whole five times a year, but I'm a complete light weight on top of that; so after one Malibu Bay Breeze (the only drink I can taste without gagging) I'm tipsy. After two, I get that glazed over, out-of-it stare, which goes perfectly with my way-too-big smile.When my best friend Kerry wants to take a picture, she'll sometimes look at me and say, "Oh no, you're smiling too big. You're drunk before the pictures?!"
When I'm around someone new (or back in the day when I would meet potential hook ups in bars), I am always aware that the difference of one drink could make me go from fun and silly to that girl that someone is carrying out. And, trust me, you never want to be that girl.
Fortunately, this rarely happens because I'm not a big drinker at all. People who have to drink are usually unhappy and/or insecure about their lives. They feel that they cannot be themselves without a few beers or shots in them. I, however, can fully be myself in any given situation and, therefore, need no daily dose of alcohol.
I know a girl who literally cannot have fun unless she is piss drunk. And if she isn't? You better watch out. She is cranky and obnoxious, staring at her cell phone until it's time to leave. I used to get really angry with her, but now I just feel bad for her. That has to be a really hard life – not being comfortable with your personality or looks, and depending on alcohol to substitute that for you.
A guy friend of mine recently put a hundred dollar bill down on the bar five minutes before closing, and said, "I want as many shots as this can get us." This, my friends, was not his best idea. Long story short, he ended up walking into a stop sign, making a snide remark to a police officer, and receiving a $300 ticket for "Misbehaving." Think the story can't get any worse? My 25-year-old friend cried...cried. After I calmed him down from his hysterical rampage, he decided to lie down in a bed of rocks in the backyard. He woke up the next morning with a fat lip, a cut knee, and $300 less in his pocket. Not very lucid....
There are those times, however, such as a birthday, or St. Patrick's Day, or Cinco de Mayo, or New Year's Eve, that it is perfectly acceptable to get shit-faced in the middle of the day, continue drinking into the night, and stumble home not really remembering much of how you got there.
Why, you may ask, do I find that acceptable and not random public intoxication? Because in those cases everyone is drunk along with you! No one is pointing and laughing when you're falling out of a chair, or walking crooked, or dancing on a bar – because they're right there doing it, too!
On a Tuesday afternoon, however, I do not recommend behaving this way. It just gives you a bad name (especially if the bar isn't all you're dancing on) and makes you feel bad about yourself in the morning. Remember, you always want to be remembered as lucid, not loose!
Have you ever been the person being carried out or getting a ticket from a cop? Was this in front of a crush?
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About the Author
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- From: Jenn
- About Me: I have been on more bad dates than I have fingers and toes to count on -- and I'm only in my early twenties! I laugh when I watch 'Sex & the City,' because I've had so many dysfunctional relationships that they might as well as made me their 5th friend. Even so, I used to love going on dates with different guys (now I only let one guy take me out on dates), eating great food, and talking on the phone until 3AM. I never did get over the idea that a guy should treat a girl like a princess -- even if I've encountered one too many frogs.
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Comments (13)
this is actually a good entry, i agree, i feel more bad for people who NEED to drink. I've had times where i've acted completely retarded and then felt embarrassed the next day. who needs that.
I don't usually feel embarrassed by whatever I did while I was drunk, it's the dumb crap I do when I'm sober that I usually can't stop thinking about later.
The only time I've really embarrassed myself badly while I was drunk was when I was at a club and was too drunk to stand, and I ended up puking under the table. My crush-at-the-time saw me and brought me some water. When he left to find someone to clean up under the table, I somehow found the strength to run off and hide in my car until I sobered up enough to drive home. He always teased me about that night while we were dating.
this isn't a dating-related post, except for the last-ditch attempt at the end to add the word "crush" in the question. editors, you fail on this one.
by the way, i used to have the 5x a year rule too, until this past nye...and my life has gotten considerably better with the added use of alcohol.
I don't have to get drunk to have a good time, but I like drinking. I generally just get a little buzzed though and don't get trashed.
I agree that this isn't about dating though, this should be on healthkicker if anything, and make it more about the health effects of drinking too much or something.
Nope. I don't really ever drink, so this is never a problem for me!
I have to say this is a pretty good post. Though I somewhat agree with @TheNotoriousGOD@xanga - but I think there are a few points that have been made that are valid, perhaps a bit indirect.
I definitely can agree with and attest to "People who have to drink are usually unhappy and/or insecure about their lives". Depression and anxiety issues among students are becoming more and more prevalent in universities in the U.S. and all over the world. And these students, especially the Americans, see alcohol and drugs as a quick fix to these dilemmas. While this doesn't necessarily directly apply to dating it's still something college students should expect to see and come across; and then must decide whether or not they want to deal with that in regards to people who do drink to excess that they are attracted to.
I know I was dating a girl who perfectly matched Jenn's description - "I know a girl who literally cannot have fun unless she
is piss drunk. And if she isn't? You better watch out. She is cranky and
obnoxious, staring at her cell phone until it's time to leave. "
I was annoyed by it for quite awhile but then I came to a point where I pitied her and truly felt sorry for her. Of course I then made the mistake of trying to help her and you really can't help that kind of person, they need to come to that point themselves.
I don't get and have never been drunk so neither has happened to me. And I would be unbelievably embarrassed to be in such a state with an SO or crush.
All in all a good post, but might want to go more into the dating aspects and repercussions of all of this.
I'm glad you had this opportunity to tell us how superior you are to anyone who drinks what is "too much" in your opinion.
I'm one of those girls that sometimes drink a lot, and guess what? It's a lot of fun! And actually it's not a lack of confidence, it's just that I'm sober most of the time so I like to have a different sort of fun! And if you don't, that's fine, but how irritating that in order to justify this to yourself, people like you always have to say things like,
"People who have to drink are usually unhappy and/or insecure about their lives. They feel that they cannot be themselves without a few beers or shots in them. I, however, can fully be myself in any given situation and, therefore, need no daily dose of alcohol."
What are you, a shrink? No? Just a mean girl then, trying to assert your superiority? I drink because it's fun, it's what you do at a PARTY or a BAR, and because it makes it easier to socialize. I'm not more or less "myself," it's just a different variation.
my ex was only fun when he was drunk -_-
I'm funnier when I'm buzzed, but I rarely get DRUNK. And if I do, it's always with my fiance because a) I'm not out to impress any other men and my fiance KNOWS my limit, b) I'm usually the one sober to keep my girl friends safe from being violated at bars/clubs and c) I'm past the age where I feel the need to get drunk to have fun. I get too many myserious bruises from nights on the town when I forget bits and pieces from here and there.\
I seem to lose my voice quite easily and as my ears muffle up and music gets louder with people talking than dancing in a club, the next day is filled with painful whispers from yours truly. I can't do weekends at bars and clubs anymore--not even for a bday--I don't need to get drunk to be loud. I AM loud! lol
I used to know this guy who acted drunk when he was sober and seemed totally sober when he was drunk. I stopped hanging out with him when he kept trying to convince me to go to clubs every weekend so I can hook him up with girls waaay too young for him and he tried to punch out a bouncer because the bouncer asked him to leave when he got too aggressive. If you can control your drunken behavior and you don't cause harm to others or the environment, just remember, your liver won't love you for long.
Perhaps being drunk in order to be considered "fun" is a cultural sort of thing. As an Asian girl, I usually try to stay away from alcohol because it turns me red and incoherent with 1 shot. However, I have white friends who insist on giving me a shot or two because drinking alcohol is the "thing to do" at bars/social gatherings, and whoever is not drinking is immediately deemed a "party-pooper."
because some people use their drunken-ness as an excuse for their douchey behavior. an example would be a drunk guy "accidentally" slapping a girl's ass on the dance floor as he walked by. then the girl sees that he is clearly drunk and reeks of alcohol, so she probably won't be as harsh on him, although I'd be just as mad of the sexual harrassment regardless of drunk or not. if a sober guy "accidentally" or maybe intentionally slappped a girl's ass on the dance floor, he is just a horny creep and should know better because his mind isn't impaired or he can't use the drunk excuse to rub up on others. or if the female is also drunk, then if a guy physically flirts with her, she might not pay attention or care since she is impaired if she is that wasted. I act more hyper depending upon the music and not the alcohol. I don't drink because I hate the taste and hangover. I dread vomitting but who actually likes that sour stomach acid taste when they regurgitate their food guts out lol
I agree with this post.. I dislike heavy alcoholics. I'm also a light drinker, I drank in HK when I was legal (19) but not legal here in TO yet;( I drank mostly like a small glass of vodka or cocktails. I never got tipsy let alone drunk so it was all in good fun, usually in nice Western restaurants:>
this blog was going good... until all the insecure bullshit. then you lost me. lol. why couldnt you just keep to the "totally wasted people are idiots" road you were going instead of sharing your theory on peoples insecurities?! what a shame. -_-