Friday, 12 August 2011
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Men Only: Poker Nights
Every Wednesday night my husband would volunteer to host Poker Night. It's been an ongoing thing for a few months now, and normally it's over at some other guy's house, but my husband volunteered our house for the male massacre that is Poker Night. Normally, I would leave the house to hang out with my friends but recently one of my husband's friends has been bringing his fiance so my husband asked me to stay to keep her company. I had no problem doing so because we were acquaintances and got along really well. She would play poker and I would just sit and watch because I really don't like poker.
In any case, the boys took their Poker Night elsewhere, which I was fine with (I didn't have to clean up after them anymore). My husband came home after six hours of playing poker last night and needless to say I wasn't the most ecstatic wife in the world, but I let it go. I made pie, and pie makes me happy. But he told me that one of his regular buddies did not show up to Poker Night - it was a mutual friend of ours who had been bringing his fiance to the nights. Apparently, she caught sight of the text that the host of the night sent out.
It read: Poker Night at my house, no girls allowed.
It made her furious and felt that the text message was about her (um, hello, I'm a girl, too?), and that he didn't like her and didn't want her to come because his friends didn't like her (that was not the case). She proceeded to get upset and told him he could not go because she wasn't allowed to go with him, and that he wouldn't be able to go until the host of the party allowed girls to attend.
My husband asked me if I was upset about the "no girls allowed" thing and I told him no. Why would I be upset? Poker Night was initially for the guys, and I encourage my husband to spend time with his friends as much as possible because I think his friends are great (not exactly a great influence, but they have good heads on their shoulders most of the time) and none of them seem to threaten our relationship or try to poison his mind about me. They all gave me positive reviews, except one, but I honestly couldn't care less.
I told him I understood why they wouldn't want the female persuasion with them - it was a guys' night for guys to talk about whatever guys talk about (cheese? dirty socks? cars? cats, maybe?) and I didn't want to listen anyway. When guys get together, silliness ensues, and I can't endure silliness sometimes. Same with girls. When girls get together, chaos starts! It was my husband's time with his friends and I should respect that.
And I told him the next poker night that comes up to call and tell his friend and his fiance that she can come over to our house and we can do some girl stuff together, because I think the thing that really bothers her is the distance. They live twenty minutes away from us, and Poker Night house is about two minutes away from mine, so maybe if she felt a bit closer to him she would be okay with him going over.
Why do you think she is upset that she cannot go to the poker night for the guys? Would you be upset if this happened with you and your SO?
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- From: CrisaRei@xanga
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Comments (10)
She's being silly. Guys definitely do need their nights away. When I was seeing this guy, he and his friends would go to AC to gamble and go to the casinos. I never knew who he was with specifically (didn't know his friends) or how long he was staying out. I could never go (not 21, blahh), but he always kept in touch and would call me before I went to sleep. If this girl's fiancee does the same thing (and is only 20 minutes away where she KNOWS who he's with and where he is), then I really don't see the problem.
I would be ashamed of myself if I ever told my boyfriend (who is a human with free will and desires of his own) that he could not go to something (unless the event would jeopardize his well being). I can't abide by controlling women. I wish I could slap unreasonable people. How would she feel if her fiance got upset because going to the salon or getting a manicure was "no boys allowed" and he told her he wasn't going to let her go anymore because he couldn't?
Some people are just super clingy or maybe she just can't stand being left out. I hate when my husband goes through those phases where it's ok for him to go out with the guys but if I want to go out with the girls he gets all pouty cause he feels left out. So annoying!
Maybe she's young and therefore immature, maybe she is clingy and has a left out complex, maybe she doesn't trust him and therefore must be with him at all times...but hey he is the one marrying her. Some guys get off on crazy chicks lol...but maybe she is just lonely. I think that's nice of you to invite her over because maybe she just wants some social interaction too.
guys need to do guys things and girls need to do girls things.
how is the guy supposed to talk about cute asses and hot chicks when his girlfriend/fiance/wife is around.
and i know all you girls talk about your celebrity crushes and hot guys, and we fellas don't want to hear that.
so let each have their own space.
When people barely see each other, I can understand wanting more time with someone. But, if people see each other a lot, time apart is good and I think needed. You don't want to loose your friends to your significant other and then not have them around in the long run.
I would mess with her.
I would go to the poker game, but I would come home with
sparkles on my neck and smelling like shame.
That girl would go bonkers. Her mind would explode from
the obsessiveness about what actually happened.
You said that she sat down and played. Maybe she enjoys poker and has nobody else to play it with?
If I was the only girl to come regularly (as you said she was other than when the poker night was at your home, and being at your own house doesn't really count as 'coming along' to me), I would believe that the message was about me. It wouldn't hurt my feelings, per se. I'd think the guy that sent it was a douche for not just asking me to my face, but not hurt.
I'd let my guy have his poker night with guys only and probably indirectly be in on the fun by watching the poker after dark tv show (some of those texas hold'em poker players are cute
)