Wednesday, 13 July 2011
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The Bitch Epidemic
In my book, a bitch is a loud, confrontational, insensitive girl--but mainly insensitive.I grew up as a bitch being insensitive to my parents and brother at home while being a nearly-mute geek at school. My bitchiness finally surfaced in my junior year of high school once I suspected my then-boyfriend of falling for my "best friend". After finding he cheated, I raised my voiced to that "friend" and to my ex many nights proceeding.
Two years ago, I met someone, my current boyfriend, who changed me. At every moment I began to smoke from my ears, he hugged me and apologized for displeasing me because arguments are not worth more than a harmonious relationship. Over time I recognized with deep shock how much I unreasonably expected from those around me without appreciably contributing or compromising in return.
I realized I did not have to be hot-headed. I realized relationships do very well without arguments. I realized even after life-long bitchiness, I could be sweet tempered in all my day-to-day frustrations. I realized that the default female reaction to an unfavorable event is not bitchiness. I realized there is a Bitch Epidemic.
The Bitch Epidemic comprises of hoards of young, self-entitled girls who believe they must be given every consideration otherwise there is hell to pay. The Bitch Epidemic also has become so engrained that women feel their bitchiness must be accepted and loved (along with every other imperfection).
However, disproportionate anger and insensitivity--bitchy character flaws--should be worked on! Loved ones do not deserve the worst from us simply because we are unhappy instead they deserve our best always.
Have you ever been infected by the Bitch Epidemic and did it affect your relationships?
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About the Author
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- From: bdefghijkmnopquvwxz@xanga
- About Me: I'm trying to figure out the truth and what to do with it. When I can or must, I create hexagons.
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Comments (22)
OH GOD! I know SO many girls (especially xangans) that take the "Im the head bitch in charge" thing WAY too far. They don't realize that being a bitch isnt empowering or dominant, it's outright disgusting and shows lack of class. Not to mention they just sound dumb when playing it out.
do they use a pic from mean girls for every post that has something to do with a bitch? super creative
also, about the post, i have began to realise that deep shock as well... i am the hot tempered one in the relationship, and he is always so sweet and caring. i feel like a serious bitch around him most days.
YAY!!!! Stereotypes!
@Erika_Steele@xanga - *high five*
I've found that there's a line to toe with these things. If you're too much of a bitch, you will push everyone you know and love away. If you're too nice, people walk all over you. I personally like turning Bitch Mode on when I need to and being sweet when I need to. Balance is key.
Yes. And that's why I'm not in that relationship anymore.
@x_damaged_yet_unbroken_x@xanga - I agree, finding a middle ground between bitchy and doormat is the best way to be.
I feel ANYONE, whether a guy or girl, can be a "bitch." I hate this gender stereotyping. Just because women have been taught to vent their anger in a certain, unhealthy, and unhelpful way (or maybe it's a continuous cycle of not knowing how to express themselves because we're not SUPPOSED to express ourselves), that doesn't mean that guys are any better. They can be violent, place too much importance on their pride, and are often very unwilling to compromise because they are MEN.
I understand your post though. The label of being a bitch can be good or bad. Bad in the way that you explained it, good in the sense that women stand up for themselves. I'm pretty sure men coined the term "bitch" in this light. Women were/are not traditionally expected to speak their minds and voice displeasure. We're just dogs to be shoved around, apparently. It's much easier to write a woman off instead of granting validity to her opinions.
@x_damaged_yet_unbroken_x@xanga - Yes. Yes. Yes.
I'm nice to every guy that I've liked, but once they cross me, then I tear his ego to itsy bitsy pieces<3
I'd say there is an equal amount of hot headed, insensitve and angry men, too. Why does it have to be the girls that are bitches? I think it's a HUMAN (in other words MALE OR FEMALE) trait to sometimes get angry and lose your cool. Does that make it right? of course not. None of us, MALE OR FEMALE, should yell at people all the time, be insensitive or feel entitled.
i think that everyone has bitch moments. I am often not hot-tempered, but there are things that will drive me insane that get me that way. Overall, I have never seen myself as a bitchy person. I just see myself as a normal person with bitchy moments....
So you are dating a door mat and that makes you happy?
Congrats
Every girl is a bitch at some point...
it's called PMS.
Just kidding! ;)
I would say I've been way more of a pushover in my relationships than a bitch.
That said, I feel like sarcasm is rude and nasty and I used to be really sarcastic all the time. I still can be when I feel like it will get a point across or in retaliation to someone who's also rude and nasty, but in my relationships with people I care about I try not to be sarcastic at all. It's been a struggle but totally worth it. I don't like hurting people's feelings without meaning to.A lot of my friends are bitches (selfish, aggressive, and if "their" way isn't met then we have no way) which has turned me off of hanging out with them. It's a good thing we are in college and separated so we have all met other people and calmed down the teenage bitch phase. Though it's not the same for everyone, my older sister is such a bitch that I truly believe deep in my heart she is a psychopath. If I find murdered children under her bed it probably wouldn't be surprising. My sister and I have always butt heads when it comes to treating people. If she borrowed a shirt I would have to let her wear it because I would be a rude bitch for not sharing, yet If I borrowed one of her shirts then I better have the money to take it to the dry-cleaners because there is no way in hell she will share anything that is "hers" (that mom bought..).
I hate being a girl and being around girls, I don't understand where decency went.
I love this. There is a fine line between standing up for yourself and being downright confrontational, and sadly, a LOT of girls today do not seem to realize this. I hate when I see young girls (I see this especially in my sister's age group, 15-18) who run around thinking they can say and do whatever they want while using the excuse, "That's my opinion. I can say whatever I want. I don't give a f*** what anyone thinks of me!" While it's good to find happiness within yourself and not get too caught up with what others think, you don't want to display complete disregard for the opinions of others, especially when EVERYONE else thinks you're a complete bitch. When everyone you encounter thinks you're a negative bitch, or when you seem to have issues with MANY different people and situations rather than just one or two, maybe it's time to change your attitude.
I will be the first to say that I'm feisty and do not take crap from others--but that doesn't mean I walk around looking for confrontation either. I am actually very diplomatic in the way I handle things with others--I'd much rather make a friend than an enemy, so I try very hard to treat others with the kindness and respect that they deserve. You can stand up for yourself and still be gracious and loving to others. As I've gotten older, I've realized that many situations just are not worth the trouble or the drama. I don't need to run my mouth, start a fight, or hide behind the words "I don't care what other people think" every time I disagree with someone. It's tasteless and immature. Sometimes part of standing up for yourself isn't actually saying something to the other person or fighting back. Sometimes it's smiling to yourself, realizing that a silly situation isn't worth your attention, showing kindness to the other person despite whatever they're doing to you, and just walking away without letting it get you heated.
I don't think you were being a bitch but more for having anger management issues and childish trantrums when you could have just sorted things out before being angry or irrational about things that do not go your way.
this is a very good website
you can go and see it
http://www.shoes4world.com
hm i lost a few friends due to this epidemic
I used to be a HUGE bitch in high school...I would say anything and everything to piss people off and bring attention onto myself...I realize all the mistakes I made then because of who I am now....I think I was such a bitch because a. I didn't eat...at all and b. who i was with...to state it simply he was a prick...now I'm happily married and I still have my bitchy moments, I'm not who I used to be. I'm much nicer and instead of just being one giant asshole....I'm just a smart ass and I enjoy it. :)
All of us never see how ridiculous we are as teenagers while we are teenagers. I was insane, and it has become a little better. I just wish I could take back all the things I said and did to my mom and sister.