Wednesday, 22 June 2011
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Goal Setting In Your Relationship
The original source can be found here: [x]If you think about it, relationships have a lot to do with goal setting. For example, once you start dating, you both begin to focus on the goals you have for the relationship – like where you want it to go and what your individual relationship beliefs are.
I’ve read some good books and articles on this subject and I believe that one of the biggest reasons why couples don’t last long is because they have different relationship goals and never communicated what their goals were. Sometimes it’s okay to let the relationship just flow, but it’s still important to talk about it and make sure you both want your relationship to go in the same direction.
Looking past the fact that you share common interests and are “in love,” where do you want the relationship to take you? Do you want to get married and start a family someday? Are you looking for a lifelong lover but not necessarily a spouse? Do you have absolutely no intention of ever getting married or starting a family? We all know that you can’t know for sure what will happen in the future of the relationship, but you can know what you wantfor the future of the relationship.
Talking about these things in the beginning of the relationship can help make the journey a little less bumpy and a little more enjoyable.
When you talk to your significant other about the goals of your relationship, it’s important that you discuss why it’s important to you. In order for your significant other to understand the importance of your goals, they need to see that they are first important to you.
Knowing where you stand individually and as a couple is important to your future as well as the future of the relationship. If you both share different goals but want to stay together as a couple, then you will both need to be prepared to make some compromises, if you aren’t able to compromise or find a common ground, then buckle up because you’re in for a bumpy ride!
It’s very important to keep in touch what you really want and need from the relationship. Losing direction can make you stay in a relationship that no longer fulfills your own personal goals. You have no control over the changes that can happen in your significant other, the only power you hold is in yourself and in your dreams and goals.
Don’t ever lower your expectations of a relationship or the expectations you have for your life just so that you can be with someone that you think makes you “happy!”
With open communication and common goals, your relationship can grow strong and healthy and make you both feel satisfied!
Do you think that having common goals in your relationship is or can be related to the success of the relationship? How important is it to you that you and your significant other both of common goals?
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Comments (7)
Good idea, but I don't know if I'd make literal goals. "Today, we will connect on a deeper level." I find that amusing. I'd be more leaning on the let's-see-where-this-goes-side, but I'd have an IDEA, probably.
Having common goals is a good idea, I think. A relationship is about two whole people coming together, complementing one another. However, there is a point where you must have common interests and desires.
I want to go to med school and become a psychiatrist. Whenever I bring up the eventual move (I don't live closely enough to any where I'd be able to stay home), my honey never wants to talk about it, saying that I plan too far into the future. I think that sometimes I do (I'm told by my college counselor to slow down, I think a mile a minute, I don't have to do all of these things NOW), but that's just the way I am. I'm a planner. He's not. He prefers to go with the flow. It's frustrating sometimes, but things do tend to fall into place, like he says... I think that we are simply different personality types. In spite of that, we love each other very much
Yeah, goals are important. And if you're at a point where you're just seeing where it goes, you can still support each other in achieving individual personal goals. Seeing how the other person behaves in that situation can really help you get to know them and let them know you, and whether you are good together.
It is very important. You gotta want the same things in the relationship or else it won't really work out.
Goals are important in relationships, plain and simple. My husband and I still make goals for our marriage. It gives you something to look forward to, something to work towards as a couple. When we first started dating and getting serious we set goals towards marriage and we got married. Now we set goals as far as our savings, our family life, etc. etc. It's just important to make sure you and your partner are on the same page as far as the future is concerned.
I kind of feel that saying "I have goals for this relationship" makes it feel like a job. While I know that the 'go with the wind' approach doesn't usually work in a relationship, I wish it did, you know? Anyway, goals are very important for a relationship, but I think it should just be communicated as something you both want. If one participant is in it for the sex, and one is in it for the long term commitment, it's obviously going to end badly. I think communication is the most important aspect to a relationship, and once good communication is in place goals just trail closely behind.
i <3 that band :)