Monday, 18 April 2011
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A Lesson in Post-Hook-Up Etiquette
Let me tell you a little story about a night out in college. I’m sure it will sound familiar to many of you and it goes a little something like this:I was at a fraternity party, dancing the night away with my girlfriends, when I bumped into a boy who I had casually made-out with the weekend before. It didn’t take long for history to repeat itself and, before I knew it, we were in his bedroom. I’ll leave the juicy details up to your imagination. What’s better is that we actually spent a fair amount of time talking and I got to know him a bit.
He seemed like a great guy and I honestly felt comfortable, considering I hardly knew him. After spending the night, he politely offered to walk me back to my room across campus and we parted ways after a hug.
I go to a liberal arts college and because our campus and student body is so small, it is to be expected that you will bump into someone you know, wherever you go. Naturally, I have passed this boy on several occasions since our hook-up, but I swear he looks in the complete opposite direction when he sees me. This makes me feel awkward. I'm a friendly person and if he wasn’t too busy finding a hiding spot, I would have appreciated the opportunity to say “hi” to him. I promise I don’t bite.
Let’s be honest here. Casual hook-ups can be great and they certainly don’t have to be or turn into anything more than what they are. Accept the fact that the odds are slim for a relationship to blossom after a kiss or even a sleepover. Even so, completely ignoring someone that you have shared an intimate experience with is just plain rude.
I’ve spent some time contemplating why this boy feels the need to ignore me, but I remain baffled. We’re all adults here, right?
Here’s the deal: if you have seen someone naked, you should acknowledge that person when he or she is clothed. I don’t care if it was your worst hook-up or if you completely regret it. Life will go on and we can all enjoy hooking up with new people. At the risk of sounding totally cliché, we’re only human, so why not treat each other with a little respect and dignity?
I'm not asking for a lunch date nor to become your best friend, but a pleasant “hello,” a head nod or even a smile would suffice. Don’t pretend you don’t know me. You’ve seen all of me.
Got an awkward hook-up story? Tell me about it in the comments section below!
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- From: JuliaGulia@lovelyish
- Name: JuliaGulia
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Comments (22)
This is why I dont hook up. The one time I did was with a best friend, and now its just awkward. We may be adults, but alot of people just cant handle with casual sex and how to handle it afterwards. Id rather avoid the awkwardness all together, and say no to the sex.
A lot of people can't handle it. Feelings, emotions or whatever, they do tend to get in the way. Maybe he wants to remember you purely as a sex object or not at all? Maybe (and this is much more likely) he is either a scared little boy, a jerk, or both?
Either way, don't worry about it. If he can't take a f*cking man-up pill and meet your eyes, you will have a better life than him.
eh, i think its the fear that if they're too "polite" after the other person might think they are interested in more, and they're trying to avoid that. i've never been in this situation, but i could imagine doing that, idk.
Maybe you should try taking your clothes off again, and see if that brings back the acknowledgement. As for the stories, I have many, but in the better interest of your frontal lobe, here's two... http://mdongivin.mancouch.com/733958308/brains-vs-beauty-and-the-lay-in-it-dilemma/ and http://mdongivin.mancouch.com/733586364/mark-swims-the-fat-lantic-ocean-and-promptly-drowns/
omg, this applies to my life wholeheartedly. sad thing is, i REPEATEDLY see and hook up with the same guy. and yet when we run into each other on campus (which is quite a lot), he has to pull the awkward card. each. and. every. time. like wtf, grow up. it's been 2 years since we've been at it.
He might be afraid that you're looking for more than just a hookup, since a lot of girls tend to have a hard time keeping emotions out of it. That doesn't make being blown off any less annoying, but from what I've heard from my guy friends, it's a pretty common reason for them to do it!
i feel ya girl...read this post i wrote on here. same exact situation. these boys need to grow up!
He probably thinks that if he's nice to you, you'll think he wants more. I don't think he's necessarily being rude.
How about this: If you're not certain whether he will acknowledge you while clothed, don't take your clothes off.
i hate when that happens...they pretend they don't see you during the day, but you see them at the bar, or at a party, they act like they love you. or they text you often but when you see them in person, they have nothing to say. bitches. haha.
I pretty much agree with the first comment here. I'm just like that and if i was in that guy's situation I'd most likely avert my gaze or try to "hide" too. Which is why I choose to never pursue hook-ups or get in those situations (I mean, if i was not in a relationship right now) Even when (if) I transfer to college away from home.
It was more of a 2 month hook-up. And unfortunately I started to find myself falling for him. I knew from the start that he didn't want a relationship, and I was totally fine with it. We hooked up a number of times, hung out with a few mutual friends, and he even told me that he's not like other guys, and wouldn't hurt me. He became my best friend. Then one day, out of the blue, he started to ignore me, avoided me every chance he had, and became to be just like any typical man out there. It sucks, but it's the truth. I think men feel insecure when they start getting too close.
My guess is there were other girls around that he was also getting it on with, so he couldn't acknowledge any of you if he wanted to keep the game going so to speak!!
It's not you. HE is the immature one, it's his battle to fight. Just smile if he looks your way, that's all you can really do.
ooooh very good image above, certainly they are using viagra prescription because it is for that...
Hey, it is so sexy.I think that this couple was having sex pharmacy
Casually once i was about to have sex with a stranger and i had to Buy Viagra because she wasn't what i expected it was my awkward moment in my college days.
People is weird... in xl pharmacy i have found a friend from long time and he remembered me as well when he look at me but he never say hi... i wonder, what's the deal on say hi....
If the worst thing you got out of the deal was a look away, then I'd probably say you got off pretty easy. Pun intended.
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The life is yours and the choice is yours so i must say that we should be separate from the issue but such a things should not be performed in colleges and schools.
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