Wednesday, 06 April 2011
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Ex-ting for a Date
My boyfriend and I had a very messy relationship. We broke up in September. We stopped talking, and we didn't want to be friends. It took him a long time to get over me, but now he's texting me again asking to get coffee as friends. I really don't want to....How do I tell him no without sounding rude?
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About the Author
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- From: mybesttheory@xanga
- Name: Sarah
- Location: Kitchener, Ontario, Canada
- About Me: I'm friendly, I'm random, I'm indecisive.
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Comments (17)
"no" works, "not ready yet" is honest maybe avoid "yet" it may be perceived as an invite for him to try to convince you yo go out, "I don't think that's a good idea, but I hope you're doing well" would probably be the best go to rejection
Just say no thanks or I appreciate the offer but I'm not interested? It doesn't have to be all that complicated.
One of my exes and I tried to be friends, then tried FWB, then went back to trying to be friends again over the course of two years. More than half the time now when I send him the occasional text or phone call just to catch up, he doesn't even bother responding. If you don't want anything to do with your ex, you don't have to have anything to do with him and he doesn't need any explanation for your reasoning, to be honest. While it's nice that you don't want to appear rude, chances are he'll be slightly put off no matter how nicely you word a rejection.
My ex did the same thing. I was completely over him, but I could tell that he wasn't over me. He was doing anything he could to hang on to me, even if it was just as a friend. I was honest with him and told him that I didn't think it was the best idea. He insisted that there was no harm in it, but I told him there was just no way for that to work right now.
My recent ex completely cut me off after he dumped me and it hurt a lot.. I understand exes can't be friends immediately, but it's just the way that he did it, deleting me, going out with a new girl immediately then blocking my close friends, family, mutual friends and I on Facebook+_+ like is this really necessary? Tell him you need a healing period away from him until it's platonic and maybe you'll reconsider, that right now is out of the question. It's straight up, not giving too much hope of being friends again but sounds reasonable.
Just say no. If he wants more of an explaination, tell him the truth. Or explain to him that the break up was really hard, and you just need to focus on yourself, or something cliche like that. It might be cliche, but it usually works.
"No" isn't that rude, just do it.
Send him this link / have someone sending it to him?
"no thanks"
Just tell him it isn't a good idea. If you don't want to be friends with him it isn't really a big deal. Sometimes you have to hurt someone's feelings to get your point across. Yes, it might be a little mean, but you guys aren't dating anymore and from the sounds of it, it doesn't sound like you want to be friends either.
Sounds like trouble. Just say no to the ex.
You just gotta tell him upfront.
Just be straight with him! Tell him you don't want to go and that you're not comfortable with it.
I agree I think being honest is the best route so you don't confuse him
Just tell him you're not emotionally ready to be friends. Plain and simple. No games, no hinting, just say that. You can even quote me if that makes it easier.
Just say, "I'm sorry I'm not interested in being friends." Good luck!
Just say no thanks. It's not rude, it's being truthful.
Hahahahahaha. I find myself in the exact same position, its just hilarious.Especially when he is so repulsive. I'm only going to have coffee with him once (since its on him and I generally don't say no to free stuff) and that's the last time I speak to him.
Of course I do not recommend this course of action either.