Friday, 07 January 2011

• Female Tears: The Anti-Viagra

  
  Unless you live in Japan or are into that kind of stuff, it's very likely that you've never had a sexual encounter where the woman ended up crying like she had second-degree vaginal burns. According to Sciencemag, that's undoubtedly a good thing. Really, it is. Results from recent studies suggest that tears may actually contain a chemical signal which puts penises to sleep like some sort of sick, perverse, wet lullaby that rains on the manly pants parade. In most cases, this is the opposite of how you would want your night to end.

  Neuroscientist Noam Sobel decided to conduct an experiment to prove that tears do indeed carry messages when they're shed under duress, not as an irritant cleanser since those two forms differ. There are chemical differences in those two instances. To conduct this experiment, he rounded up:

  -Two women who could cry on command.
  -A sad film (NOT The Notebook).
  -vials to hold the tears in.
  -Popcorn, possibly.
  -24 men.
  -Saline solution.
  -Cotton squares.

  After the women cried themselves dry into these vials, they were handed off to 24 men for ten deep breaths. This was once again repeated, except with the saline solution running down the cheeks of the women into vials as the control. The men later had their noses plugged with tear-stained cotton squares for the rest of the experiment. Once this torture scene was over, they were asked to rate emotionally ambiguous pictures of women on the emotional and attractive scales.

  There was no distinction between the smell of the tears and the saline, and it also had no effect on how sad they believed these women to be. However, after having tears stuffed up the ass, the women were deemed to be less attractive. Heart and breathing rates skyrocketed, replacing the usual arousal in this respect, while testosterone levels plummeted which indicates that sexual arousal was going down on them in an obviously non-sexual way.

  The part of the brain that signals arousal was impacted negatively when tears were introduced, compared to how it functioned under normal circumstances while viewing pictures of sexy women. One interesting thing to note is that women are more susceptible to crying during their menstrual period, in which they're less likely to conceive. From an evolutionary standpoint, this makes sense because it's another way of stating that you shouldn't even think about getting any just yet. Keep it in your pants, Tiger.

  Although much is left unanswered, this points to the existence of chemicals in tears which influence the sexual interaction between men and women.

  Okay, so it seems like a fairly obvious conclusion to draw, especially since the last thing we think about in association with sex is crying. Again, I know they do things differently out there in Japan, but I can't wrap my head around a condom much less the concept of arousal as a result of tears. Even if you forget about scientific experimentation, it's obvious that tears associated with pain won't naturally arouse you. Unless you're Japanese or a rapist and can give me some insight on this, I simply can't understand it. Part of the joy of sex for me, personally, is knowing that the girl is just as satisfied as I am. I've come to the point where I can't come without first making her come. Tears are the last liquids I want her to excrete.

  Overall, it's an interesting article which I've yet to see many studies on. As an experiment of my own, I'll make sure to find a girl to cry for me over the weekend while having sex. If you can suggest perfectly viable ways of making her cry, let me know.

  What are your thoughts on this topic?
  Are tears really that big of a game-changer in the bedroom?
  Perhaps you're in the minority and are aroused by tears? Let me know.

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