Sunday, 26 December 2010
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I'm Swearing Off Men
I have the WORST luck with men. Worst. It's like I'm jinxed or something. Every relationship, or semi-relationship, ends bad. But I've finally come to conclusion that it just has to be what I'm going for.
Let's take my last legit relationship for example. We dated for two years - on and off respectively. Every time we broke up for a period of time he always had someone else in a matter of hours. I should have caught that red flag right from the get go but apparently I was too blind to notice there must have been something going on behind my back. Anyways, we broke up for the stupidest reason - all because I told him that a guy I work with was selling a car and I was going to look into it. He instantly started telling me I was cheating, blah blah blah. So we break up, and for good this time. I find out the next day he was cheating on me the whole time with the neighbor girl that's still in high school (he's almost 21). Made me feel like a peach.
So then I move on... or so I think. The next guy has zero maturity. I mean, come on, I'm 19 and he's 17; what else could I expect? That relationship ended just about as quick as it started. Right down the toilet.The next guy was 25. From high school to beyond college, I moved up in age quite quickly. Well, he had two kids and baby mama drama that I didn't particularly want to deal with. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love kids - just not taking care of them when I'm barely an adult myself.The only man in my life right now that I could even remotely say I would consider being "right" for me is my best friend. However, I just don't feel that way for him, even if he does know me better than I know myself. So I've decided to swear off men for the time being. OK - if you know me, I can't exactly swear them off, but I can try and keep my eye on the books and not on the very attractive male standing in front of me. I just hope Mr. Right comes along sometime soon ... this waiting is a killer.
Have you struggled with waiting for the right guy?
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About the Author
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- From: katilyn
- Name: katilyn
- Location: Youngstown, Ohio, United States
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Comments (90)
Consider moving to a place where the average male IQ is somewhere above "slab of drywall."
i have no luck with men either so i'm right there with you. my problem is that i just keep meeting all the wrong guys and it's not like i'm picky either. i just need someone to meet me half way.
Been there, done that. And then I found a good egg. It'll happen, dear. And it happens a lot faster when you stop putting up with shit and learn the warning signs early. I was slow to learn, but once I did, it made life so much easier.
Stay positive and be optimistic and just maybe it'll lead to opportunities.
@kawasaki_saiyan@xanga - Agreed
I'm not really looking for a relationship. the last one was too much stress. they're like soap operas waiting to happen. at least the relationships that I've been in were. I'm single and okay with that
It takes a lot of time and a lot of jerks to find a good one in there. I started dating when I was 14 and now I am 23 and JUST found a decent guy who doesn't cheat, lie, act mean to me, and plus he knows me really well and we get along great. It takes a long time! I am sure sooner or later you will find someone, and a tip - sometimes it's the last guy you would think would be good for you!
Choose girls! :)
umm out of curiosity you understand ahh... while yer waiting umm wanna jus fool around awhile?
@tavatava@xanga - hahah! Agreed
haha i've sworn off men as well, and i've lamented the fact that i was born straight XD
ahh i know how that is!! it is always just something that makes me tick off about guys
I've sworn off men too ... until I meet one I like again.
Also, I feel like you need some standards.
standard # 1. if you break up more than once, then quit dating the guy. happy couples don't break up, get back together, break up, get back together etc. (see relationship number 1)
standard # 2. don't date men with kids. 25 with 2 kids? He sounds like a keeper - I can't believe you broke up with him. I hope the kids are with the same woman.
I don't have much luck with women myself. I've ben dissed, played, lied to, and rejected numerous times. I'm not gonna swear off women because I still have a little bit of hope left.
I hear when you stop actually looking for a great guy, you find one... I don't necessarily believe that, but it's worth a shot. I've sworn off relationships for the time being. More single fun for me
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why are you waiting for a guy? focus on yourself.
don't rush in a relationship. follow your heart.
I realize that when I don't WANT a relationship, guys come unexpectedly and I have amazing relationships. I've had about 3 relationships after my first "love" (which was a heartbreaker) and each time, I wasn't looking for a relationship... but they were really great guys that I ended up being with them and I've learned so much from them. My boyfriend right now is amazing.. each guy just gets better and better.
So don't wait or expect, they will come to you. In the mean time, focus on yourself and being independent.
You're only 19 my dear. Most people don't meet "The Right One" at that young an age. You still have planty of time. Cheer up, Grow up and focus on building your life. You are on the edge of adulthood. Enjoy life and become who you are as an individual. Love will come.
Your problem isn't "waiting for the right guy", it's that you're intentionally going after the WRONG guy. As you pointed out, you know an awesome guy - you just don't want to date him because he's an awesome guy and thus doesn't have the appeal of the douchebags you do date.
No, cause I don't wait around for the right guy.
It's not always the guys fault you know. You have to look at yourself and realize that you're human too and that maybe you're doing some things wrong also..... ever think of that?
While I am waiting for the right guy, I am working on improving myself and doing things I have wanted to do with friends and family (i.e. travel, ski, snowboard, sky diving, rock climbing, and etc...) to pass the time since I too am getting impatient. However, these words from Diana Ross give me hope and make me feel a tad bit better (esp since she felt the same)
: "I remember mama said: You can't hurry love. No, you just have to wait. She said love don't come easy. It's a game of give and take. You can't hurry love. No, you just have to wait. You got to trust, give it time. No matter how long it takes"