My boyfriend is in the military as well. All I can say is you have to let him do what he wants to do

When you say, "however it wouldn't work out between the two of us if he were to go." You have already decided it won't work.  You don't have to lose him and it dosen't have to be that way. But life and love is a choice and it's your choice.

I can't live off of Skype, letters, and phone calls for a long period of time.

I was exactly like you. It really is a lose-lose situation I hate to say. I'm still slowly moving on.

@PrincessPatriotII@xanga - Agreed.

"I truly love him.."

Do you?  I feel like you are using the term very loosely here.

I want to tell you to support him, be there for him, yadayadayada.. but it's obvious you can't do it.  I have dated and married a military man before and if you're not going to put yourself wholeheartedly out there for him and this relationship, don't.  Instead of loving him and supporting him, you should love yourself, be fair to yourself, and be honest with yourself and him about where this all is heading.

I've done LDR and it can work, but it takes a lot of hard work and efforts from both parties especially if you're going to be dating a military man.  Decide what would be best for you and stick with that decision even if your decision will make or break you two.  Honestly is always best.

If you 'truly love him' you would make things work. Period. You'd live for those sporadic Skype convo's, the weekly letters, the limited phone calls. If you aren't willing to do all that, you might want to rethink whether or not you really love him.

If you truly love him, you'll work through it. It won't be "I'm the type of person that physically needs them to be with me. I can't live off of Skype, letters, and phone calls for a long period of time." It'll be "He needs me to be strong, tough, and do this for him while he serves our country."  True love is about loving him more than you love you and putting his needs above your own.

Don't hold him back. He'll resent it. Let him go. And if you can't send him off to Basic with a hug, an "I love you, I'm proud of you, I'll be here when you get back," break it off now. Basic's hard, he doesn't need to go through a breakup while he's going through Basic, and he doesn't need it when he gets out.

It's hard. And it's hard to understand why a person has to join the military. Some of them just do. It's what they were born for. And it's hard to be one of the people back home waiting and praying for them to come home. But it's worth it. Because soldiers (or, my soldiers, my boys) are some of the finest this country has to offer. They know that I truly believe that. And they need to hear that to keep them going sometimes.

If you love him like you say you do...you should be able to stick it out. It's very different when a person enlists into the military rather than if he was moving across the US and going to a University where there are all night parties and such. He's joining to serve his country and to get in on some good benefits.
My hubby is in Iraq now and will be there til next Fall. I miss him like crazy and him being so far away actually makes me appreciate him more and remember how we fell in love in the first place.
You say you've been on and off and i dont the reasons why you were off in the first place, but i guess that also plays into your issue with separation. But also, put yourself in his shoes too...if you were going away for awhile would you want him to leave you just cuz he physically needs you to be with him? When a man or a woman joins the military...they need to be with someone opposite of selfish, someone who can face things head on and also be side their side even though they are thousands and thousands of miles away. So, if you feel that you cant be that person..than you do need to let him go.

I think you've already decided it won't work, which is fine. I couldn't handle it either. But if it's what he wants to do, you need to let him go. My ex-boyfriend was in the Air Force here in England, and it changed him beyond recognition. After that, I swore I'd never get involved with another military man. I can't handle the distance and how much it changes them as a person.

It's totally okay for you not to want to be in a relationship like this - don't let other people tell you you're being selfish! If you're not going to be happy, and you know that, it's not worth it. But he wants to join, and that's his decision, and you need to let him do what will make him happy.

@decievethelight@xanga - I totally have to disagree. The military does not discourage dating, nor do they have weird workshops that scare them and making them believe a marriage/relationship will not work. What they do is give them information so they will know along with their spouse with what they are getting into. Because being married to a military person is NOT the same as marrying an average joe. So the whole them wanting to focus on their mission is complete bull. & I'm speaking first hand because I happened to marry a military man a YEAR after he enlisted. There was no huge change in him, other than becoming a better man and being more responsible. 

If you love him like you claim you would honestly let him go off and be supportive of his choice. It looks like you've already made the decision that you can't be with him if he goes even though he hasn't even left yet...?

"It'll be "He needs me to be strong, tough, and do this for him while he serves our country."--She couldn't have said it any better.

Set him free...he needs to do what he needs to do for him and as do you. Telling him you don't want him to is like telling you he doesn't want you to do what you feel you should do in your gut.

Good luck!

Love conquers all. You just have to determine if this relationship is worth the price.