Is it just me or do guys from other countries act more like gentlemen more than guys from America?
This guy I have a major crush on is German (currently living in Iceland) and he's the most respectful guy I've ever met. Along with him, I have a friend whose is in a long distance relationship with her boyfriend who lives in England (they've been together for over 2 years now) and he's the nicest guy.
Now, I know there are some good American men out there but from what I have seen its not very impressive. From the disrespectful jokes to sending me fake porn sites it's kind of sad to think these males are in their twenties.
My question to you ladies and gentlemen is this: are guys from other countries more respectful than American guys? Why or why not?
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Comments (138)
More respectful? Maybe. But it seems to me that it's not just an American thing.
lol its called being politically correct... we cant be so nice without demeaning your sex, lol you gals forced the issue so we react accordingly heh hows it feel to be equal?
It's not only American men. It's all men.
There are some men that just know when to turn it off.
and other don't know HOW to turn it off.
The ones that WEREN'T raised in America are the ones that know how to turn it off.
@beforedawn@xanga - All that says to me is that the culture needs to grow up and be more respectful as a whole. There is no wrong in wanting to be treated like an equal.
I don't think it probably has much to do with it being America.
Although, there are a lot of American women who get pissed off when men open doors for them, etc. So maybe they're afraid?
That being said, what kind of guy is sending you fake porn sites? I feel like most of the guys I know are pretty good to their female counterparts, even if they're crude to other males.
But like someone else said (though he may have been joking) I would say it's about equality. There's no reason for guys to treat women better than they do each other. We're all worth the same.
@prettynpink628@xanga - umm respect you deserve? what would that be? who are you that i have to respect you? we are equal remember? and according to you i cant respect you because of your gender, i have to respect you as an equal, as male as it were... i walk into a room and see another male..k the respect game begins. do i work for him or he for me?? both no so on to next question. can i kick his ass? is he that much bigger that there is a doubt? k... am i smarter than he is to the point i can cause him to kick his own ass? men respect power and if the other male has no power the respect game changes. i will accord him the respect his power/lack of power deserves. the game of males demands this. yes i can be nice, gentle as it were but respect? respect is a powerful word and to gain it you had better deserve it.
quite honestly as a stranger i can only give you the respect that position holds. for more respect from me you will have to earn it as will i, in time, earn it from you should i prove i deserve it.
lol last thing..when was the last time you worried about giving a male respect?
I think it's just an individual thing.
Although, I have noticed that south asian men tend to be less respectful towards women.
I think it's because in their culture, women are completely looked down! There's such a huge gap between a woman's world and a man's world in those countries..
I also noticed guys being total assholes to their fat/ugly wives.. I know I know, who am I to judge who's ugly/fat? but come on, unless you're stupid, you know what's ugly and fat..
yes men from other countries are definitely more respectful. i feel like american culture pressures men to be as asshole-ish as they can possibly be. the more disrespectful, perverted, and aggressive a guy is, the more respect he receives from society. it's just what the media teaches them. guys from other countries have more freedom to do as they wish and act however they want to.
Idk, I don't really think it's an American thing...even when it comes to porn there are waay less American films that deal with degrading women than ones made by other countries.
@beforedawn@xanga - respect is about proper treatment. it has nothing to do with being "nice" or "gentle." that's sexist bullshit, which is what needs to change. it also has nothing to do with gender. you can't tell if you can kick someones' ass by looking, so it just makes you look petty to try.
it's not "respect is earned," it should be "you have my respect until i know you don't deserve it."
you don't bump into someone on the side walk and say "i can kick his/her ass, so i won't apologize." you think "i don't know whose fault it was, and it was an accident, i will apologize." THAT is proper respect, though on a smaller scale. everyone deserves respect until they prove they are unworthy of it.
To Be Honest, I think it is also dependent on the girls and women. Frankly speaking, women in other coutnries don't compete to be "equal" with the guys as much as they do here in the USA, and I've found that women in other countries genuinely appreciate it when I act gentlemanly around them, such as holding open doors, opening car doors, pulling out chairs, being respectful them and to their elders and betters, and holding a coat open for them. Here in America, it's almost the exact opposite: I've often been given a look like I've just slapped her in the face when I've held a door open for a woman or girl in the past, and on several occasions. Please, ladies, don't jump on the guys, because there are plenty of us who have been raised to be gentlemen to whom most American Ladies act around and look at as if we've contracted the plague or just beamed down from the Starship Enterprise when trying to be such around you. I'm all for women's rights and equal opportunity, but when it comes to my desire to be a gentleman around you, ladies, please don't cut my head off when I'm making a genunie effort, then turn and moan and complain that Chivalry is Dead in America. Trust me, if Chivalry has gone the way of the Dodo, understand that a great number -- if not a great majority -- of ladies helped it get there...
It's all men, not just American men. The English guy I'm dating right now is a sweet guy. But the English guy I hooked up with last summer turned out to be really skeevy. Also, one of my best friends is German. Obviously he's not a bad guy if we're such good friends, but he's just as pervy and immature as the rest of them lol.
It's not just American men. There are some disrespectful men from other countries. I've seen it. It's all based on how they were raised... that's all.
@laurenmaureen@xanga - agreed
@beforedawn@xanga - Please don't make assumptions about my respect for males. All of my best friends are guys, always have been. I get along with men, not with women. I respect men more than women typically, because I'm a product of my environment just like everyone else. That being said, I
hatedbeing the odd one out of my group of friends. I was either the weakling or the princess, neither of which I ever asked to or wanted to be.
I show respect for everyone, until they do something to make me lose it for them. I simply meant that to me, equality means equal opportunity for success in the game of life, not equal opportunity to be the butt of each other's jokes, and that we as a society need to mature.
Maturity and respect are not nationally exclusive. Would you turn down a well-mannered young man from Texas for a drunken football hooligan from England because of their nationality? Probably not.
It's all in the upbringing. You can find piss poor examples of parenting on all six continuously inhabited continents and probably in Antarctica too.
What the hell is this? Are we seriously not only going to give the disrespectful label to a gender but also to a gender from a certain a country?
You guys are all fucking idiots.
NO, from what I've seen it's the other way around. My sample pool is a lot bigger then yours seems to be, although it's still not big enough to generalize.
@xXDC_luyouXx - Exactly!
You American women are something else. You think beating men is funny and "empowering" when in truth, it's actually just as cowardly for you to hit a man as it is for him to hit you.
Know why?
Because men CAN'T hit you back in self defense or he'll go to jail! Not only that but our parents and this society told us that we cannot hit a girl no matter what! Plus, notice how there is normally a dozen guys nearby ready to beat on the man who dared defend himself?
Those are the guys who "disrespect" you sweety. Disrespect? Worship excessively is more like it!
Young women have closed the pay gap with young men. More college degrees and jobs are going to them as men have been about 4 in 5 of the job losses this recession.
You get the kids in divorce 9 in 10 times over the father.
You get into certain nightclubs for free.
You can literally kill a man and get a slap on the wrist for it.
You get special treatment in schools.
You get showered with gifts.
You get to laugh on Television when a man is kicked in the balls and if a man speaks up about it, hey that's his problem according to this society.
I hear this all the time "Women are taking over!" "Women are MUCH smarter than men!" "Women can multitask better!" "Women can do ANYTHING better!"
You can't cook like you used to #most of the top chefs are men#
you can't raise kids like you once did #kids from single mother households face a very high incarceration rate#
You can't clean like you used to #that's oppressing women#
I am sick of it. You want special treatment! You never wanted equality! If some American men don't respect you, I think that, among other things would be why.
And no, I am not bitter or fat or ugly and I don't live with my parents. I don't care if I can or can't get laid. I've had enough of you.
I work in retail in a city that has lots of imigration and foreign visitors. Let me say, there are some really rude american customers and some really polite ones. There are some really rude foreign customers and some really polite ones.
This is an unfortunate stereotype. You can't judge a person by the country they're from, Jesus.
I like how guys are coming on here and saying that American women are the ones to blame for not allowing themselves to be respected... that's very much comparable to the men who claim that women who are raped are asking for it.
You American men are proving this article right... You don't respect women. You tend to forget how much oppression women have faced ever since the beginning of this country's birth and long before America even existed. You fail to remember that we had to fight for our right to vote b/c you the American male believed us to have brain capabilities comparable to animals outside of our species. You fail to remember that we were demeaned in the workplace and not allowed to rise to higher positions b/c again women were considered stupid and only fit for at home life.
There have been so many psychological testings that show that men and women do not have any differences in intelligence. WE are the SAME! The only difference is that men and women are built differently which has to do with mating and survival of the species.
For the person who came on here calling themselves "american women suck", I could care less if you say that women are not as good as they used to be in their usual gender roles but gender roles were placed by the patriarchal part of our society. Men say that women should know how to cook, clean and take care of children b/c that's what they're supposed to be doing right? But that's just b/c you say so. What if we had never thought of women as being the stereotypical caregivers, what if it were men? Then maybe you would see where we're coming from.
Maybe you would see what it's like for a woman who from a young age always aspired to be a dentist or other occupation but b/c her family believes in arranged marriages was forced into a marriage at 16. Had a few children and was stuck at home unable to do anything except what society told her she should do.
Society tells us to do so many things that we don't even realize that it's telling us to do them. We all think that we have certain roles that according to our sex, age, creed, culture, etc. are the norm. Well what if we didn't have those outlined norms and rules? What would it be like? We wouldn't be having this conversation in the first place and people would stop being so damn nasty with one another!
Of course American men are awful. Americans in general suck, which is a result of America sucking.
America is the shit tank of the western world, so why do you think the people would be any better? So glad I'm leaving the country next month.
I don't think it has much to do with where a person comes from. If I had to blame it on anything, I would blame it on how they were raised, and who, later in their teen years maybe, allowed them to be disrespectful and make them think it was okay (i.e. girls who were disrespectful to them, or girls who "took" the disrespect on a regular basis and never complained, letting them get away with it) I think it's probably pretty bad to put a label on dudes from a certain country just because of where they come from. Guys are guys and some just take more than they are supposed to, and some don't. It depends on so much more than where they are from.