... doesn't mean you're the perfect package.
Relationships are more than physical attraction.
Relationships are more than good sex. Pretty girls get turned down all the time. Why? Well, maybe he wasn't looking for Homecoming Queen. Maybe he wanted someone who is willing to live with a plumber, trying to build up a small existance. Maybe he wanted someone who shares his passion for writing.
Just because you're pretty, doesn't mean you share his interests, dreams, ambitions. Don't trust your good looks to land you every guy you want. There is more to a relationship than that.
Relationships are work. When the butterflies and jitters leave, when you are no longer anticipating when the next kiss might come, and the bills start piling on while the years fly by, you
will struggle. You will have fights and quarrels and disagreements. In those times, you need more than your good looks to hold everything together. You will need to remind yourself why you got together in the first place.
And when you ask yourself why you're together, you better be able to pull up more than "beautiful eyes", "dazzling smile", "the way she touches me". You better be able to understand why he is awake at 3 in the morning, writing, rather than lying next to you. You better be able to understand why she's up at 5 in the morning to go running, rather than sleeping in with you.
These are small things in the beginning. You like sleeping in, but if she wants to go running, that's okay. But when you're going through a rough time, and all you want is to just stay in bed and hold her, and all she wants is to find release in running, you are going to have a problem. You are going to have to understand what they other person really needs right now, and even be willing to make sacrifices.
You may not think it's a big deal, in the beginning, if he leaves your bed in the middle of the night to sit in front of the laptop and work on his newest idea because it just can't wait. But when you've just had a series of fights, and just want to know things are okay between you, but he can't spend the night in bed next to you, you are going to have to understand how he thinks, and manage to work things out.
Mutual interest, ways of thinking, and similar goals and ambitions, are crucial in any relationship. Sacrifice and understanding.
You need more than a pretty face. You need more than a six pack.
And just because you have a pretty face, doesn't mean you are everything they've ever wanted.
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Comments (105)
Kett, this is one of my most favorite pieces by you, ever. So real. You're amazing. <3
this is a great blog, love it! :)
woohooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! datingish picked you.
i loveth my ketteth.
I totally agree with this!
Well i rec-ed before so now that this awesome blog has become famouse i'll comment too :D
First off Well done Ketterz for getting datinish-ed.
And second this is a fantastic post, without a word wasted it gets across such a vital message that everyone should remember.
Thanks for writing it.
-applauds-
Yes, please :3
this blog is... stupid? common sense? im not trying to be mean but i don't think anyone actually thinks looks can get them everything and make things work.. or maybe i've just met anyone like this.
I love this so much. So well put.
Love this! And I completely agree!
@SpOnTaNeOuS_sPiTbAlL@xanga - I often find that stating the obvious is in fact necessary, for a lot of people. May seem like a "duh" factor to you and me, but a lot of people are blind-sighted.
@SpOnTaNeOuS_sPiTbAlL@xanga - Thank you! thought this was a bit obvious.
Not that it was a stupid post but I haven't met anyone who relies on solely looks to keep a relationship going.
I agree on the obvious part, but its a nice post. I know lots of pretty girls with flat personalities who never can get guys who can stay with them long term. It's sad, but you need to be pretty and have a personality to have the best selection of guys.
@RockstarJuiceNStarburst@xanga - like i said, wasn't trying to mean, just a lack of words really. but i haven't met anyone dumb enough to be so blatantly blind to think their looks can buy them the world and love
@reesa14@xanga - not that i thought it was bad post, i just felt it pointless.. and a bit ridiculous everyone was praising it like they felt like all pretty girls thought their faces win over everything.
Just because you can type, doesn't mean you should.
WTF? Whole lot of hating on the pretty people lately, huh? What's the matter Datingish? Winter blues starting to hit ya?
By the way, even though being attractive doesn't make you a perfect package, it sure as hell puts a nice bow on it. Maybe even a cherry on top.
and yet, all i see everywhere are couples of approximately equal attractiveness. i feel like the number of people that claim to subscribe to your belief is not well reflected in the general population. the fact is, unattractive guys will continue to get turned down by (relatively) more attractive girls, and vice-versa. there's a certain amount of market efficiency involved.
indeed! ^^
@mcmeister89@mancouch - whipped cream makes it even sweeter
@TheNotoriousGOD@xanga - Similarly endowed individuals tend to operate at the same comfort level. So even though you may see a consistency in how people come together, the shallow obvious may be an underestimation.
@RockstarJuiceNStarburst@xanga - Whom are you attesting to blind-sightedness? That is quite an accusation.
i like this.
I would have to agree...sometimes physical attraction isnt' enough...
@OstentatiousEloquence@xanga -
@SpOnTaNeOuS_sPiTbAlL@xanga -