Wednesday, 01 December 2010
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I Hate the Three Day Rule
I’ve never been very good at dating; the whole idea of the chase has totally annoyed me always. Though that being said I also love it, but I don’t have the patience to cultivate it.When guys first talk to you, they have a rule of thumb that they don’t get in touch for a couple of days. I don’t know if this is a good thing, I’ve never waited it out to see how it would work.
This weekend I got a guy's number, mostly because my friend wanted it, but I kinda liked him and my friend was super drunk and her phone was dead anyway. He put his number in my phone and I sent him a text later.
We talked some via texting that same night and it got a little dirty, but it was late and I just flirted a little then told him good night and that I would be happy to hear from him again. He said I for sure would and to have sweet dreams.
Now it’s Tuesday; the texting conversation was Sunday night. And this idea of 2 or 3 days is killing me. It’s all I can do to not pick up my phone and call him. It’s not that I was super attracted to him wanting to have his babies. It’s just I can’t wait to save my life.
So I’m asking, what is everyone’s rule of thumb when you make a connection, exchange numbers and then what do you do?
Plus for me, should I just bite my nails and let him get in contact? If so please explain.
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- From: coralcwayla@xanga
- Name: coralcwayla
- About Me: I'm a people watcher, and story teller, I used to blog on myspace, but I'm liking Xanga much better, it's fun to read other peoples stuff, and I love writing about my life, a lot of my content is more like my own Log at this point. My current topics mostly include dating and stuff to do with my job working as a mechanic.
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Comments (55)
What 3 day rule? I think I missed something....if you want to talk to somebody, just talk to them.
I hate the waiting period myself as well. And I know what it's like when you don't even know the guy and you wonder if there's something wrong with you for wanting to talk to him so bad. I'm not really sure why that happens haha.. I guess it's just that thrill of the chase that you explained wanting to know where you stand.
But for me, I try and wait it out as much as I can but if a week passes and nothing has happened then I just give it up. If the guy was someone who I really liked and will more than likely see again b/c of either work or school then I contact him so it won't have the potential to be awkward. Just a way of clearing things up. But otherwise if I will never see them again then I don't bother.
But yeah if they don't contact you within a week then they aren't interested.
Don't take my advice for a grain of salt, because apparently I'm weird, but in the initial stages of a relationship I want to spend as much time with the person as possible. My theory being, the sooner I get to know 'em the better. Why waste time if it ain't gonna work out in the long run? May come across as clingy, but if the girl wants some space, I'll give it to 'em.
most guys ignore the 3 day rule. they've never heard of it. mature guys, mind you.
it's whatever you want to do. do whatever the hell makes you happy.
I don't usually end up with a girl's phone number...so I can't really help you out here.
(I haven't ever had a 3-day rule in effect.)
I don't wait. I go after what I want :)
Do what you want. Who cares about the three day rule or any of that stuff. If he's interested, he's interested. If not, you can wait a billion years and he still won't contact you.
@jeezshoua@xanga - agreed
@UnconventionalButterfly@xanga - amen
@jeezshoua@xanga - agreed... :P
I wasn't aware there was such a rule. Text him. If he gets flighty on you he's probably a twat anyhow.
Ditch the little dating rules/games. They are silly.
lol the last girl that asked "aren't you supposed to wait a couple days and then call me?" i just stopped talking to her completely. she still texts me once in a while, i still ignore her. i guess the 3 day rule is a juvenile phase, and in retrospect, it's to make the guy not seem desperate to this girl he likes. as us men mature, we begin to believe that any girl, that thinks a guy is desperate (when in actuality he just genuinely sincerely likes her) just because he called the next day, is immature for thinking that way.
so it's all good... just call. or text. make plans. once you break the ice, it's all uphill from there ^^ have fun
I say wait. I understand that you should do what you want, but if the guy is interested then he will get back to you. If he's not interested then he won't. If it's bugging you that bad then at least wait a couple more days before you text him, it's too soon right now. If you text him too soon he'll think he's already "caught" you and you're not much of a chase. ALWAYS keep things an interesting chase (;
what a stupid, "rule." call the boy when you want to!
Bleh. It's 2010, I still can't believe that "the chase" is STILL ingrained in the minds of women. What's so hard about being proactive and being the one to call if you're interested?
I simply blow off any last-era chick that EXPECTS me to make the first move and pursue by doing the forementioned like waiting for ME to be the one to call. No, I will NOT value you more -- by playing the game of MAKING me chase you.
Seriously... Are you trying to find someone or not? These gendered dating conventions and rules are just sooooooo antiquated and ridiculous.
Patience is NOT a virtue.
Most of us (smart) guys only follow the 3 day rule to not look needy to girls. If YOU want to talk to him though, we're more than happy to oblige (assuming he's into you and it wasn't a one night thing). That being said, if YOU want to initiate contact, that would be amazing. As for us, we kinda have to follow it or it's not really a "chase" for girls and y'all will get bored of us quickly because it's not exciting for yous guys.
what a rule! just don't appear needy.
That "rule" is ridiculous. I've never known anybody to follow it, actually. Most guys just call if they're interested. If they're still playing games like waiting three days, they're probably too immature for a relationship.
Wait, wait, wait. What the fuck is this three day rule bullshit? It's 2010, and we're not going to sit around on our asses waiting for a response. Take the initiative, otherwise we think you're not into us and then we simply go about our business. Speak up or lose.
BTW: I wonder, have you told your friend that you got her crush's number and kept it to yourself? If she sees you two dating, I just wonder what her reaction is going to be.
nice one.
my rule of thumb is to not text/flirt with guys my friends like.
I don't know, I usually text guys if they don't text me, although all my friends warn not to. I think if a guy is really interested, he will text you, But you texting him shows that your not afraid and interested. I think it can work both ways, but if you're texting becomes obsessive, then it will turn the guy off. I don't have much experience in the guy department so I probably shouldn't even be giving advice, haha.
Just text him. Â If he hasn't contacted you again by now, he probably a) has been busy and hasn't had a chance, b) forgot about you and your semi dirty Sunday texts, or c) isn't all that interested. Â There could also be the small chance that perhaps your friend found out/remembered his name and looked him up on Facebook or something and has been chatting him up, which is why he hasn't been talking to you...cause, ya know, it was kind of a dick move to send dirty messages to a guy your friend's been eyeing, no matter how drunk she was and how drunk you weren't.
I think the rules are stupid too. Just text him, if he's cool he'll text back, if he's not cool and he doesn't text back then it's better than way anyway.