Thursday, 28 October 2010
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Help! Did I Scare Him Off?
A Datingish reader needs your advice!
I just moved into my new apartment a little more than a month ago. The complex is fairly small, with 2 apartments on each floor. My roommates and I have been hanging out with our other floor mates recently, with one in particular that I'm attracted to.My neighbor and I flirt frequently, and things got a little steamy one particular Friday night. He would come over and hang out just by himself and invite only me to do things with him and his room mates. My friend even asked him if he liked me and he said yes.
A few weeks ago, I sent him my number in an email, saying we should hang out just the two of us sometime...and now he avoids me at all costs. Was I reading the signs wrong?
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About the Author
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- From: upon_thehour@xanga
- Name: emily
- Location: Virginia
- About Me: i don't put limits on myself. i wish i had sectoral heterochromia.
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Comments (28)
Yes.
You mean all the while when you two have been hanging out and you don't have his number?
Could have been you jumped the gun a little bit. Or it could be that he prefers to be the one who makes the moves, who knows. Doesn't really matter though- if he were interested, he'd be all over it. Sorry, dear. That sucks.
I don't think you scared him off. I think maybe he's just changed his mind. Sucks either way. I'm sorry.
maybe you should've just given him your number in person rather than an email. emails suck when it comes to personal interaction.
@mystic_sapphire@xanga - I concur.
Or perhaps, he had a gf. Or he suddenly became interested in someone else. Neither way, I wouldn't sweat about it. He ain't the last guy on earth.
meh i doubt it. he probably has a girlfriend you dont know about. or just found someone else.
whats meant to be will happen. let it go , im sure youll run into each other seeing how you are neighbours
@paulinemalpage@xanga - @jeezshoua@xanga - agreed.
@mystic_sapphire@xanga - Agreed
Most likely, he got that good old red flag with the words GIRLFRIEND ALERT written on them. He probably just was afraid that the casual relationship was going to be taken to a more committed place, which can be scary for a lot of guys, even guys who admittedly have feelings for girls. Give him space, don't chase. Don't hold your breath on this one, but don't blame yourself. If he's not ready, you don't want him anyway.
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i think he probably met another chick
Maybe you should ask him. I mean, who would know better than him? Honestly, it sounds like things are already awkward so it can't really hurt anything right? As long as you present your question casually without "chasing" or seeming hurt, he'll be fine with telling you the truth. Good luck.(:
If he chickened out that fast, do you really want to be with him?
maybe the steamy part was a one time thing and he thinks you want to be friends with benefits, which would complicate your friendship, so he doesn't want the potential drama and just be friends that all hang out together as neighbors, instead of a more than friends relationship.
Honestly, there is NOT enough information to really give any feedback as to why he didn't want to hang out.
There could be a BILLION reasons why he didn't get back to you -- just like how guys can be rejected JUST for the way a guy says, "Hi".
You were probably only a booty call for him. Or, well, booty walk-up, I suppose, since you live so close and he didn't even have your number. Whatever, he's probably just an immature little boy. Find someone else who's better looking, better behaved and has manners and gives you his number to begin with. That'll show him.
If you see him all the time, why did you choose email? Should have handed him a slip of paper or something. At least then you could have gauged the reaction on his face.
Honestly its a lot of possibilities here, one he could be retardly shy, by steamy i hope not sex then hmmm, 3 he could have a girlfriend and dont wonna cheat on her or waiting for the right time to really approach you. Its one of those things where you have to face him up front to know the truth. Not enough information to really give you our opinion or advice maybe. Honestly i hate to sound mean but giving the information that you gave us, if you had u had sex NOT SAYING it is but a high chance u been used for sex. Hope everything works out the way u wish it too be
pretty sure he got a girlfriend or something
you didnt do anything wrong. i would of did the same thing as you. there isn't anything wrong with you, there is something off with him. maybe he just wasn't looking for something serious (ex: you hanging out with his friends instead of on a one on one level most of the time, no phone number exchange, etc.)
That's why I don't give out my number. If you never try, you never get rejected! Sorry you got hurt though. :(
@mystic_sapphire@xanga - agreed. people change their minds quite often.
bootycall?
He avoids you?? I'd move on.