Monday, 25 October 2010

• Don't Ignore Your Girlfriend During Sports!

  
  The odds are stacked against a guy to find a woman that cheers on all his favorite sports teams including college. 
  
  If you have found that woman, congratulations!  Do not expect the high fiving, chest bumping, head butting to continue forever.
  
  I’m not trying to sound like a chauvinistic pig, but typically women lose the passion of sports as time goes on and especially after marriage.  I do not mean she won’t want to cheer her teams on, but the half time keg stands, beer bongs and endless hot wings will decline significantly because after a certain time in relationships have passed, Lifetime will be more important than you. 

  When that time does come that means you have crossed over into the, “what’s more important?” phase.  That day will come when you’re asked if the game is more important than her and your brain will be saying yes, but you have to tell them they are more important.  You have to say it with a straight face, looking sincere, and not looking at the game out of the corner of your eyes. 

  Yeah, it sounds impossible, so here’s a way to help you acknowledge her existence during games and not just to get you another beer and bag of chips: you should apologize to her. I know you didn’t do anything wrong, but a simple, “Sorry, I’m really into this game, thanks for being here” will keep her happy.  Do not go stumbling into her, spilling your beer, and slurring for her to get you another one.  If that happens there’s no amount of Vicodin that will help the pain she’ll inflict on you.

  The nice thing these days is the world of DVRs.  Unless there’s seconds left in a critical game or the final out, we need to pause the game to listen to her vent out about a coworker, family member, the broken nail story, or how her mother calls her everyday to tell her she’s doing everything wrong in life.  With the DVR, we can catch up to live tv by skipping the commercials.  A while back I started a football game one hour later than the actual start time and caught up by the fourth quarter.  You do not have to worry about anyone texting or calling you with the final score.

  The bottom line is sports are important to most guys. However, there are relationships where the female cares more about sports than the male and in that case all the above applies to her to show him affection during the game. 

  Now if you’re the guy that’s with a girl that’s more into sports than you, you really need to take advantage of the situation.  When her alma mater has eighty yards to go for the win and not much time is on the clock, it’s time for your winning drive.  Pay attention to her body language and learn what she wants and needs and how excited she gets or angry.

  If her team wins, your celebration should be jubilant and somehow end up on the floor with you on top of her.  If her team loses, throw stuff at the TV and get a little aggressive with her, giving her the okay to take her aggression out on you, and again, somehow end up on the floor with you on top.  The best part about sports sex is there’s no cuddling afterward, instead it’s all high fives, head butts, ass slaps, and chest bumps.  So at least I’m told.

  Guest blog submitted by lovedetour.  

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  What do you think? Helpful? Totally wrong? Anything you want to add?

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