If he ain't your son and you're not paying that phone bill - you have no right checking his messages without his consent prior to you doing so. Its an invasion of privacy. 

I open my boyfriend's messages but we essentially share a cell right now and he'd rather me check it and read it than accidentally open it mid-game and forget about it. Privacy is privacy, but I really believe if you're gonna marry someone and get serious and be in a serious monogamous relationship, and you're STILL freaking over cell-phone-privacy...well...just not a relationship I'd really want to be in. To each their own, I can understand both sides of the argument. But I live with my boyfriend. He listens to me burp, knows all of my secrets and my friends, puts up with me night and day around that time of the month..why would I care about cell phone privacy? After being together with so long, it's all taken into perspective, I think, and looks kinda silly.

That's just me though ^_^ Like I said, some people are very privacy driven. 

Not every business of mine is your business in despite of the fact that we're in a serious, long-term, monogamous relationship.

I don't check up on my husbands phone but it's not off limits to me. 

@WordsandThoughts@xanga - Agreed 1000%. People in relationships are entitled to privacy. If an SO gets paranoid everytime I call or text someone that isnt him, it so will not work out. 

@simply_surveys321@xanga - Good question, and I totally trust him. I don't go through his phone psychotically or like search for things. But if his phone is near me and he gets a text, I read it if I feel like it. He does the same for my phone. We don't see what the big deal is in it I guess.

@raspbxrrryjam@xanga - I agree. I feel if I asked, I should be able too and there should be nothing to hide. But I feel absolutely no need or desire to go through his phone. Not because I'm afraid too, but I trust him enough and have enough faith in our relationship to not feel the need.

I don't make my SO tell me all the names of every one of his friends, I don't make him show me his phone, I don't think that all of his business is my business. Even if it was a mutual friend texting, I would say "Oh it's so and so texting you" and then if he said to open it and read it to him, I would. If he didn't, I'd leave it alone, and continue what I was doing.
The fact of the matter is people text all the time, and sometimes they text very personal information about their life, or what is happening. If I was to open a text from a mutual friend that was ONLY FOR MY SO'S eyes, I don't think it's very respectful to our friend... and it's NONE of my business until that friend decides to tell me.

He would never off limits his phone to me, but I only use it while we're out for internet access when I'm bored, or need to check my email. I'm not going to be all over his shit, because I feel entitled. People like their privacy, they like to know that they have something that is theirs still even though they are with someone. It would drive me absolutely insane, and I would probably get rid of my phone if I was with someone who was constantly going through my phone.

You know, though I very much so appreciate your point, and totally encourage an open book lifestyle, I kindof feel like your point of view is a bit off the deep end.  In a good steady relationship, trust totally should be at full reign, there should be no secrets whatsoever... however, the problem I have with your thought process here, is that -- your boyfriends business is his business and his alone.  You, as the girlfriend,  have every right to ask him any question about whats going on, you have every right to be fully informed, but its kindof stepping over the line to go through one's mail or online account, or phone or whatever, without them knowing or giving permission before hand.  Yes, nothing should be shared, but that is a complete invasion of privacy.  Your life is completely separate from his, just as his is from you.  The problem comes in, in the fact that being invasive like this it leaves little room for trust and faith in your partner.  You have no reason to trust him because you have all of his information at his fingertips.  And i dont know about you, but faith and trust are aspects of a relationship that I wouldn't want to diminish.  And besides, if nothing else, sometimes his business really just isn't any of your business.  No matter how much you might think it is, it simply is not.  There are some things that you should not know.  Case in point -- what happens if a friend or relative or someone he trusts confides something very serious in him, and expect him to keep that information quiet.  Should you come across that at some point, you have not only invaded your boyfriends privacy, but you have also invaded the privacy of the person who deeply confided in him.

My boyfriend and I share your beliefs. I might get embarrassed when my boyfriend reads some of my texts (because they're mostly about him and how awesome he is). But, we don't hide anything from each other at all. We're pretty much best friends in boyfriend/girlfriend form.

I think it's fine as long as it's agreed upon. But...I would only do it if you said "hey, you just got a text from so-and-so" and he was like "what does it say". Otherwise I wouldn't even have the desire to read it anyway.

@WordsandThoughts@xanga - Agreed unless you ask him..then it wouldn't be. If you're not sure if it could be an invasion of privacy ask..