Monday, 20 September 2010

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Comments (21)

  • thegirlwiththecamera@xanga

    It's only been a little over a month, but from what I can tell, he meant it. We were in a long distance relationship and the distance just got to be too much. We haven't seen each other in person since we ended it, but we have plans to hang out (we're only 2 hours apart, so it's not completely inconvenient to still visit each other.)
  • StylishMudd@xanga

    if the guy says it, then he really means it. if the girl says it, probably not. 
  • lil_KyungMin@xanga

    Whatever the case I think whoever says it means it. I'm still friends with the girls I've gone out with or got turned down by. We still talk and occasionally grab food. It is a nice way to let someone down but who would say it any other way unless they absolutely hate that person? So it's more like a default thing to say to let someone down like that.
  • buddy71@xanga

    i think it is tough to go from having strong feelings for some one and then try to curb those feelings to be just friends.  if you could not make it as a couple, you most likely not make it as friends.  but that maybe depending on how close you are. each of you have not changed, so what ever you didnt like about the person is still going to be to be there.  i just feel it would be hard to do as feelings can not be turned on and off.
  • clandestin_e@xanga

    i think it's situational... i mean i broke up with my ex bf of about 3 months, i'm happily dating my current bf (for 1.5 years) but i still talk to my ex sometimes, just about life, his current gf, him finding a job in graphic design, things we find on the internet.. random stuff. we don't talk often, but i still consider us 'friends', and i know i don't want anything else out of it (i honestly wouldn't even go to lunch with him... online friends works fine for me) and i dont think he wants anything else out of it either.
  • StillNotaPrettyGirl@xanga

    a boy said this to me once right after he dumped me for another girl. it made me so frickin enraged..in fact i'm getting pissed just thinking about it.

    whether it's sincere or not, it's still a hurtful thing to say. it's like saying: "you're cool to hang out with and all... but i don't like you enough to actually date you." and the dumpee is always going to be reminded of that fact throughout the course of the friendship.
  • xx0behindthesmile@xanga

    my ex said that to me. in the beginning, i was mad at him, because he didn't treat me like a friend the way he did when we were originally friends. i then realized, at the time, he liked me, and now that he didn't and there was history there maybe he couldn't go back. you can only go forward.


    i'm also not the type to be friends with my ex's. we talk once in awhile, catch up, make sure the other one is doing okay. we respect each other and like each other as people. i only got to that state after i was completely over him.
    this other guy i liked - we were only ever friends. there were emotions, but never a relationship, so going back to the friend mold was fine. i felt completely comfortable, again, when i was over him though.
    i think it depends on the person. it's a hurtful thing to hear when you feel more than friendship. but once you're over it, it's fine. and then if you mean it or not, it generally doesn't matter. people move on, you know? 
  • kinamorata@xanga

    It sucks being on the receiving end of it. 
  • Hinase@xanga

    @buddy71@xanga - So very true..


    @kinamorata@xanga - Yeah, you're right about that. I've had that happen before...it sucks if they mean it or not.
  • disorderedpersonality@xanga

    It all depends on the situation, in my opinion. Maybe you decided to try dating someone, only to find you don't click as a couple but do have enough common interests to remain friends. This has happened to me before, and we've managed to stay friends thus far. If it was a serious and/or long-lasting relationship, "just friends" probably won't work out too well.
  • sevencrystaltigers@xanga

    It can work, if one of the people doesn't have strong feelings for the other. How can someone be friends with their ex if they're madly in love with them?
  • x_unapologize_x@xanga

    I was recently just got told this the other day. This guy wrote me a love note and then said he was kidding and then said he meant it as friends and THEN finally told me he meant it as more than friends, but it took an arm and a leg for him to tell me. Anyway, it gets better, THEN he told me that he just wanted to be friends cause he didnt want to hurt me again.


    Am I buyin' that? Not at all.


    But then why did he go through all that? I just dont even know.


    I think the line within itself is just stupid. I have said it before but I elaborated on it and such. I honestly did just want to stay friends with this person and the attraction just wasnt there and what do you do when that's not there? So, I guess it is what it is.
  • huestar@xanga

    I said that to my ex even though he didnt deserve it cause I generally want to be friends with everyone and well..we're friends now haha. Mainly platonic and thakn goodness for that. 
  • chiffon_pixie@xanga

    i've said that to guys who tried to hit on me, and i didn't mean it, i just said it to get rid of them. but, i also said it to my ex, and i meant it. he retorted with "i'm not your fucking friend, fuck that" and proceeded to harrass and threaten my boyfriend and i. so i stopped talking to him, at which point he came to me apologizing and saying he sincerely wanted to be friends. at that point, i didn't really care if we were or not but i felt bad for him, so i agreed, which led to him playing the friends game while trying to get me back and taking subtle jabs at my boyfriend, which led to me ending communication again which led to him leaving me voicemails threatening to chop my boyfriends head off and shit, so now he's in jail, my boyfriend and i both have restraining orders and we need to go to trial pretty soon. i'm thinking either being friends with an ex is a really bad idea, or it depends on the person & he was particularly crazy, lol.
  • sastsuki@xanga

    My ex boyfriend told me that after we broke up that we could still be friends, but I thought I couldn't handle friendship after a hard breakup so I told him I didn't want to be friends at all. After some time or more like 3 years later things are good now. I guess things have changed and I guess it is better that we are friends instead.
  • lagnolalia@xanga

    I never really had to say it. All my best friends had feelings for me before and of course, I mean it when I say that everything between us is completely platonic, that I don't share their feelings and would like to remain the comfortable friends we are. I also include that I understand if they do distant themselves for awhile or decide to just take time away from me. :D

    I wouldn't say anything I don't mean. Honesty doesn't have to mean brutal but it shouldn't be sugar-coated either.
  • CelestDiggory@xanga

    I meant it the first time I said it, then when the second time came around, I didn't say it because I knew i DIDN'T want to be friends with the fucker.


    I mean most of what I say, and of the most, this is included.
  • Liquid_Pain_523@xanga

    Depends on the person who says it, obviously. You'll find out soon enough after the breakup if they really meant it.


    Also, that picture is adorable.
  • RealistFantasies@xanga

    i've never not be friends with an ex.
  • darkblinds@xanga

    Sometimes people cry over it. Sometimes people don't. It depends on the situation. Even though you have that connection, you are still remote.
  • DigItAll3691@xanga

    Whenever I say it I mean it. I do want to be friends but at the same time I don't want to hurt their feelings. 


    I mean what else would I say? I don't want to lie to them and say yes I like you cause that is a mess of problems waiting to start. 
    Whenever I have a new friend that's a girl; I always look for a friendship never someone to get with. 

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