Thursday, 16 September 2010
-
Help! I Think I'm In Love With My Older Brother's Best Friend
I'm 18 years old and last night after a night out and a bit too much wine, I walked home in the moonlight with this boy who I have liked for about six months now. It was perfect in every way. He was a great kisser, a gentleman, and he is genuinely one of the best looking males I've come across. Now I'm sat here the happiest I think I've ever been in my short life.I'm also terrified that tommorow when I see him at our local night club he will either:
A) Not remember due to alcohol
or
B) Choose to forget because he regrets it and then spends the rest of the night ignoring me
Either way I will be devastated. What makes this a little bit worse is that he is 26, yes, 8 years older than me.
What makes this even more worse... He's my 26 year old brother's best friend. They've been best buds since before they could talk and I just pulled him. My brother will kill him and I'm in a terrible situation. The fact that he is my brothers best friend also makes possibility B a lot more likely. Which in turn makes me hurt a hell of a lot.
Thing is, he flirts with me every week, he holds my hand in the club, he buys me drinks the whole night, and now he kisses me. He is a great looking guy, tall dark handsome, muscular, good beard (which I think is vital) I've fallen for him so bad, it is probably very naive and immature of me to say this, but I'm pretty sure I'm in love with him.
What the hell do i do?
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: kim
- Name: kim
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 1 Views: 0 1809 Comments: 0 17 View all posts by kim
Comments (18)
I hate to say it... but make sure he isn't doing it just to drive your brother nuts. Even if all of this is happening under your brother's nose, he could be trying to "land" you just to rub it in to your brother (yes, even though they are best friends).
My cousin ALWAYS had a thing for his best friend's sister. He would constantly flirt with her and try to hook up with her. I think he even took her out on a date. Why? While yes he was attracted to her, he thought it was super funny how much it drove his best friend crazy.
You have obviously known this guy for a long time (since he is your brother's best friend) so look at his dating habits... if he is a hit it and quit it type of guy... then be VERY careful. I'm not trying to doubt that he could have honest feelings for you... but you should check all sides to a story before letting yourself fall head over heels for this guy that already has strings attached.
B) Choose to forget because he regrets it and then spends the
rest of the night ignoring me
Then he's not a man. He's a boy. Who wants to be in love with a boy?
i have no real advice, sorry. but this story made me smile, and i think this (puppy, perhaps) love is adorable. good luck!
There's nothing wrong with an 8 year age difference. My one ex and I were 9 years apart. It only didn't work out for us because He wasn't right for me. (I have a tendency toward older guys. lol.)
As for your brother's best friend, I think you have the best advice, look at his dating habits, then look at how he handles the situation. If he talks to you about it, at least that shows some maturity. If he does either option A or B, then do you really want someone like that?
Talk to him about it, if he's really is a mature and genuine as you make it sound, he'll be more then willing to talk. And, if it makes both you and him happy, you're brother should be happy for the 2 of you, and not have a problem with it.
Although, I have to be honest. I've been there, and there's a chance he just sees you as his best friend's little sister, and is kind of just being protective of you. If that makes sense...my sister's guy friends were always like that with me, and now her husband is the same way.
he just wants to get it in. ur a girl and he's a guy. guys like sex and well... he might just want to get it from u. watch out
I think he wants to stick it in you. Plain and simple. Dudes are dudes, and alcohol only makes it worse.
Well if you're serious about a relationship, I don't see what's wrong with it. They're best buds. They should understand each other.
Alcohol from a man. Red flag.
You never really mentioned the other stuff besides physical atrraction. I dunno, seems like he just wants to bang but I really don't know. Just be careful because guys are douches (well not all but most of the ones I meet are) Oh and girl..... I love older men :) so sexy haha
Quit drinking.
Just go for it ;]
If I were in that situation, I would wait and see how things pan out. Don't worry about it, because that'll make the situation a LOT worse. In your mind that is. I would go to your club or whatever and act like things didn't turn out the way they did. Talk to him of course, don't ignore him, but don't jump to the conclusion that he'll either forget or choose otehr things over you. You never know, your brother could be a little shocked by it, but be somewhat ok with it. I would let the guy come to you. that's how it's supposed to work anyway ;) Let him come to you and if he brings it up then that's when you ask him what's going to happen.
Good luck!
go for it, the only problem i foresee if is if he does something to hurt you, then your brother will get pissed and big drama will occur. Otherwise, it should all be ok.
while everyone thinks this is none of the brother's business, ( which I agree) i can c why it can b a bad idea. What happens if they get together n eventually breaks up? this guy is the brother's BBF, n she is the sister.. .. can u say awkward??? What if it's a bad break up? the brother eventually hv to choose between the BBF or the sister's side. maybe.. i dunno, anything happens. Or of course it can b a really good relationship n they r happily ever after.
Okay so this exact thing happend to me four days ago..and iv like him for the last three years...it happend at my house...and after he went into my brothers room and told him straight away, and said he liked me...then the next day we where texting and he said that he liked me but didn't want to hurt my brother so we said we would just forget it happend...but i cant stop thinking about it and i really want it to happen again with him...so should i let my brother get in the way of my happyness or should i just let my brother be mad for a week and pursue this guy?
Well, if the guy had the audacity to say he likes you but not standup to your brother then how do you expect the realtionship will go after you have successfully got with him?
There's always going to be a 'I'm going to ask my brother/sister what they think' dynamic. And you have to come to the reality that the middle person (bestfriend/brother) is always going to be the third person in your relationship.
I think it is very selfish to disregard the realtionship you have with your bestfriend/brother. If you're a 'life is too short' type of person then you really don't need anyone's advice. However if you're really looking for a key lasting relationship (considering you have waited for 3 years) then I suggest that you wait for the guy to make his move again and stand up to your brother.
Anyways good luck. My general opinion is that it's too complicated when you get close to your bestfriend's brother or your brother's best friend. Every situation is different so tread carefully because you may hurt a lot of people.
J.F